Nicole Kidman is still 'raw' after mother's death
Nicole Kidman is still feeling "raw" following the death of her mother.
The 57-year-old Hollywood actress was left devastated when her mom Janelle, 84, passed away in September 2024 while her daughter was attending the Venice Film Festival in Italy and she dropped everything to fly home to be with her family - and now Nicole has admitted she's still struggling to deal with the loss.
She told Allure magazine: "Losing my mother changed every part of me … I'm so raw with it. I feel embarrassed because I feel like: 'Oh, you've talked about it enough.'
"I'm trying to be quiet and have it be a more intimate thing. The love was so profound that the loss of it … I'm on the journey of grief, the year of magical thinking."
Nicole went on to talk about ageing and admitted she finds it difficult to face losing her loved ones.
She added: "I've always been a future person, and suddenly you go: 'Oh'. It's coming to terms with the idea that you have no control over the future.
"Probably that's to do with losing people very, very suddenly. I have more time behind me than ahead. That shift in the ratio becomes a big thing …"
She went on to joke that she's looking forward to getting older and losing some inches off her height, adding: "My mom always said: 'It's hard being five ten and a half.' I have not shrunk at all.
"I'll be very happy when it happens. But at this stage, the last thing you need to be saying is" 'I wish.' At some point you go: 'Don't wish for anything.' Move forward. Shut up. And get on with it."
Nicole previously revealed there's no "time limit" on grief and she will continue to process her feelings in any way she wants.
During an appearance on 'CBS Sunday Mornings', Nicole explained: "Wow, three months on, and people say to me 'Yeah, she was 84, a good life ... '
"But that was my mom. It doesn't matter what age someone is. There is no limit on grief, you don't have to have a time limit on it, you don't have to be all better by this time.
"You're allowed to pass through in waves and people go: 'Oh well, whatever', but it's my mama, my life, and I'm allowed to process and grieve in the way I want to."
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