'I had no choice but to flee my controlling partner'
Ryan Wellings was jailed for more than six years after being found guilty of assault and coercive and controlling behaviour earlier this month after Miss Dawes death in July.At the trial, Judge Robert Altham said he had "disparaged her appearance, said her dead father would be ashamed of her, that she was fat and ugly and incompetent at her work".
The number of coercive control offences recorded by police across England and Wales has risen in the last two years to more than 45,000 in 2024, according to the Office for National Statistics (ONS).It was made an offence at the end of 2015, and the ONS said the recent increase could be due to improvements in police recognising cases and using the new law. The woman told the BBC her partner had "played with her mind", told her she was a "worthless person" and that "nobody else would ever want to go out with me"."He had worn me down so much that I believed him," she said.It was part of a pattern of controlling behaviour, including checking on her through phone calls, turning up in person, telling her what she could and could not wear, and on occasions even locking her in the house.
To the rest of the world he seemed like the perfect boyfriend, she said, but behind closed doors "he turned into something else".She said the relationship ended one Christmas after "he pushed me and I fell backwards into our bathroom and smashed my head and that's when he started kicking me".Her best friend hired a van and helped her pack in a two-hour window when they knew her partner would be out, before driving away to leave her house and most of her possessions. "When I look back, what I see is that he put a noose around my neck and then as the weeks went by he slowly, slowly, slowly tightened the noose," she said.She described the coercive behaviour as an "invisible, very secret crime"."I think there are too many women - and men as well - that suffer in silence," she added.Despite losing her home, she said she believed there was hope for those trying to escape as she did, adding: "I got my freedom back".
'Suffer in silence'
James Maguire, a solicitor for Maguire Family Law, said the Manchester-based practice had worked an increasing number of clients that were either victims of coercive control, or perpetrators."I see a staggering amount of cases where people are spying," he said. "Sometimes it will be the home security cameras and listening devices but sometimes they've purposely installed trackers on cars."The legal process can only help so far. The police can do what they can do in terms of their powers, and the same for a family law solicitor, but sometimes my clients are broken from this."His firm held a nationwide survey of 2,000 people that found more than a third of people did not know coercive control was a crime. Manchester charity Talk, Listen, Change offers relationship counselling and supports victims of domestic abuse but also works with the perpetrators of coercive control. The charity's Anna Callaghan said the help can take a long time to bear fruit, but results do come."We absolutely see lightbulb moments from people where they change their thoughts and feelings and their attitudes towards their partner or ex-partner and really start to understand the impact their behaviour has had on those around them," she said.She described the lack of awareness that coercive control is a crime as "really concerning" and said the organisation wants people to know there is help and support out there.
Listen to the best of BBC Radio Manchester on Sounds and follow BBC Manchester on Facebook, X, and Instagram and watch BBC North West Tonight on BBC iPlayer.
Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles
STV News
7 hours ago
- STV News
Up to 3,700 Afghans, troops and civil servants may be victims of new data breach
Some 3,700 Afghans, British troops and civil servants may have fallen victim to a new data breach, after an incident involving a company linked to the Ministry of Defence. Stansted-based Inflite The Jet Centre Ltd suffered a data security incident which led to 'unauthorised access to a limited number of company emails', according to the firm. The company provides ground handling for flights operated under a contract involving the MoD and the Cabinet Office. About 3,700 individuals are thought to be potentially affected by the incident, including Afghans who were brought the UK. It was revealed in July that some Afghans who fought alongside British forces had their data leaked when defence official released the details of 18,714 individuals 'in error' in February 2022. Troops travelling to routine military exercises and journalists accompanying ministers on official engagements are also among the potential victims. 'We were recently notified that a third party sub-contractor to a supplier experienced a cyber security incident involving unauthorised access to a small number of its emails that contained basic personal information,' a Government spokesperson said. 'We take data security extremely seriously and are going above and beyond our legal duties in informing all potentially affected individuals. The incident has not posed any threat to individuals' safety, nor compromised any Government systems.' A statement published on Inflite The Jet Centre's website said: 'We believe the scope of the incident was limited to email accounts only, however, as a precautionary measure, we have contacted our key stakeholders whose data may have been affected during the period of January to March 2024.' The data is not thought to have been shared publicly or released on the dark web. In one email, seen by the PA news agency, the Cabinet Office told a passenger that there was 'a risk' their visa details and information about their job had been leaked. Their passport details may also have been compromised. The notification read: 'HM Passport Office advises that you do not need to cancel or replace your passport, as security measures are in place to prevent misuse without the physical document.' The victim may be affected by the leak 'because certain information is required by ground-handling companies to enable flights to depart and to arrive'. In a separate notification reported in The Independent and The Times, the Government's Afghan resettlement team said that Afghan Relocations and Assistance Policy (Arap) reference numbers may also have been leaked. Get all the latest news from around the country Follow STV News Scan the QR code on your mobile device for all the latest news from around the country
Daily Record
9 hours ago
- Daily Record
Glasgow mum Michele Bourda who vanished from Greek sun lounger: searches enter second week
The whereabouts of 59-year-old Michele Bourda remain a mystery after her husband woke from a nap on a Greek beach to find her gone. The search for missing Michele Ann Joy Bourda, who vanished from her sun lounger while holidaying in Greece, has reached the two week mark. The 59-year-old's whereabouts remain a mystery after her husband woke from a nap on the beach to find his wife, from Glasgow, gone and her belongings left behind. I nvestigators continue to pore over clues as to what could have happened to the mum after mixed reports emerged from the scene in Kavala. A fortnight after her disappearance from Ofrynio Beach, the Mirror looked at the five major clues surrounding the case. Final hours before disappearance A photograph taken the morning Michele vanished was released to Greek media five days later. The snap shows the Glasgow-based British tourist dining at a beachside restaurant alongside her Greek husband Christos. Retired Michele, who previously worked at BT and for a local council, could be seen chatting to Christos. Pharmacist Christos, 66, previously said: "She had seemed quite happy that day. We went for a short swim as it was windy and there were a few waves. She then ordered a few crepes and said we could have a nice sleep after. Unfortunately, I fell asleep first, and when I woke up, she wasn't there." Outfit clue Michele has been described as 5ft 5in, with a slim build. She has blue eyes and shoulder-length hair. At the time she was last seen, Michele had been wearing a distinctive outfit. The British embassy in Greece shared a notice on social media which read: "Michele Ann BOURDA went missing on 01/08/2025 at the beach of Ofrynio in Kavala. On the day she went missing, she was wearing a swimsuit with decorative stones, yellow water shoes and red plastic sunglasses. Her life is in danger." Foul play statement Police have stated that they've seen no sign of foul play in their investigation, while asserting that they have not ruled out any possibilities. The Greek missing persons charity, Lifeline Hellas, issued a Silver Alert warning that her "life is in danger" the day after she vanished. The alert read: "Her life is in danger. If you know anything, contact the Silver Alert service, 24 hours a day, at the National SOS Line 1065." Greece's Hellenic Coast Guard launched a search operation at sea using three recreational craft, five fishing boats and two patrol boats. Christos later criticised the police probe, claiming: "The police didn't do anything on the day. One guest who was there that day said she didn't see any police and I didn't see any police that day either, not one single policeman at the beach. "The only thing I saw was a police car driving up and down the road to the beach. Not getting out of the car, just looking in the direction of the sea." Christos, who first met Michele at university 36 years ago, said: "I have been searching without sleep or anything. Day and night, especially early in the morning. Join the Daily Record WhatsApp community! Get the latest news sent straight to your messages by joining our WhatsApp community today. You'll receive daily updates on breaking news as well as the top headlines across Scotland. No one will be able to see who is signed up and no one can send messages except the Daily Record team. All you have to do is click here if you're on mobile, select 'Join Community' and you're in! If you're on a desktop, simply scan the QR code above with your phone and click 'Join Community'. We also treat our community members to special offers, promotions, and adverts from us and our partners. If you don't like our community, you can check out any time you like. To leave our community click on the name at the top of your screen and choose 'exit group'. If you're curious, you can read our Privacy Notice. "It was hard to see at night, though, as it was so dark. For days and nights I have gone up down the coast, searched bushes, olive groves, empty houses, building sites, later I went to the hills, nothing. [...] "The whole night before, she had been holding my hand, and you would never think anything was wrong or something like this would ever happen. I don't think my wife would have gone to somebody in the car or anything. I really don't. I have tried everywhere, but one person alone is very difficult to find something." Temporary stay A coast guard official said that Michele had been "residing temporarily" in Serres, northern Greece. But neighbours at home in Crookston, Glasgow, previously told the Record the couple live permanently there but regularly travel to Greece and have a holiday home there. They said the pair had lived in Glasgow for several years after moving from England to be close to their son and shared their shock at her disappearance. One told the Record: 'It's just horrendous. I can't imagine what the family are going through. Swim warning A sports instructor previously reported seeing a woman matching Michele's description swimming in deep waters, saying he had warned her not to swim further out. Police later informed Christos that the man has withdrawn his statement. Neighbours back in Glasgow told how the couple regularly enjoyed hiking and wild swimming. 'They are very outdoorsy and active. They go out hillwalking and wild swimming. 'I feel like the longer this goes on the less likely it is that she will be found ok.'
Daily Mirror
9 hours ago
- Daily Mirror
Waitress desperately tried to chew through plastic bags over her head before horror death
WARNING DISTRESSING CONTENT: Melinda Lee Mercer showed extraordinary determination in the final moments of her life, chewing through two of the four plastic bags that had been placed over her head In her final moments, Melinda Lee Mercer fought determinedly for her life, having attempted to chew through the plastic bags which had been cruelly placed over her head. An autopsy carried out after Melinda's tragic murder discovered evidence of the 24-year-old's desperate fight for survival, with findings which left investigators disturbed. On December 7, 1997, officers from the Washington Police Department received a call letting them know that the naked body of a young woman had been found at a dump site in the port city of Tacoma. This body was later identified as belonging to Seattle-based waitress Melinda, remembered by her mother as "the most loving girl" in a heartbreaking interview with The News Tribune. Tragically, Melinda had been ruthlessly slaughtered by evil Robert Lee Yates Jr, a former US Army helicopter pilot who would become known as the 'Grocery Bag Killer'. And the crime scene bore a chilling resemblance to three others that police had seen in the Northern Washington area. It comes after a boy, 5, is murdered by kidnappers because his mum couldn't pay the £39 ransom. READ MORE: One-year-old baby girl found dead in hearse as funeral home staff make horror discovery Melinda had been shot three times in the back of her head, but her death hadn't been quick, Crime Monthly reports. The ruthless killer had placed four shopping bags over her head during the attack, and plastic fragments found in her throat showed that she had managed to chew through two in a frantic attempt to escape. Drawing comparisons to the other three crime scenes, police realised they had a serial killer on their hands. Little did they know at this time that Melinda was in fact the eighth victim of the as of yet unidentified Yates, a father-of-five and former prison officer whose crimes dated back to the '70s. For years, Yates went undetected, often targeting sex workers during his killing spree, which lasted from 1975 right up until 1998. The twisted killer always stuck to the same method, shooting them and placing plastic bags over their heads. To this day, there is only one known survivor of Yates' who lived to tell the tale. Sex worker Christine Smith had initially been apprehensive about providing services to Yates, and even asked him if he was the cold-blooded killer local police were so anxious to track down. He reassured her that he was a family man and a veteran, and that she'd come to no harm with him. While performing oral sex on Yates, Christine felt as though she'd been struck on the head. Thankfully, she managed to run out of her attacker's van and straight to the police, where a medical examiner found fragments of a bullet in her hair. She'd been shot at, but miraculously, it had only grazed her scalp. Other women preyed upon by Yates were not so fortunate. Including Melinda, Yates killed at least 15 women, making him one of the most prolific serial killers in US history. Finally, three years after Melinda's horrifying death, officers began to close in on the truth, focusing their attention on the Johns who frequented the Red Light District. This included Yates, who was once pulled over by police with a sex worker sitting in his passenger seat. After Yates refused to give a DNA sample, officers became even more suspicious. A search of Yates' old Corvette, which he no longer owned, found traces of fibre from one of the victims, Jennifer Joseph, as well as a button from her blouse. Dried blood was also found in the passenger footwell. From this point on, the investigation snowballed, with officers able to link Yates to more than a dozen murders. In 2000, after being charged with 13 counts of murder, Yates was sentenced to 408 years behind bars after appearing before the Spokane County Superior Court. As per the Los Angeles Times, in a tearful courtroom address to the victims' families, Yates apologised for 'the sorrow, the pain and the anguish that you feel", acknowledging that he had "taken away the love, the compassion and the tenderness of your loved ones, and I've submitted in that place grief and bitterness". This admission would have provided precious little comfort to the grieving loved ones. This included Melinda's devastated mother Karyl Bushell, who harboured deep regrets over her final conversation with her daughter. As per the Associated Press, at Yates' second trial in 2002, Karyl wept as she recalled Melinda's issues with substance abuse. Karyl had lined up treatment for Melinda, who had confessed to struggling with heroin addiction, but when the young woman didn't show up, she decided it was time for tough love. When Melinda asked if she could move home with her, she refused. Karyl recalled: "She wanted to come home and I told her she couldn't. I told her she had to start helping herself. She said, 'Mom, you're supposed to love me.' I said, 'I do, but you have to help yourself.'" This conversation, which took place in October 1997, would be the last time Caryl ever heard from her daughter. She told the jury: "I'll never be the same." This second trial saw Yates convicted of the murders of two other women in addition to the previous 13: Connie Ellis and Melinda. This time, he was given the death penalty. To this day, Yates remains behind the walls of Washington State Penitentiary, having made unsuccessful attempts to overturn his conviction. In 2018, The Seattle Times reported that, along with other inmates, Yates' death sentence had been reduced to life imprisonment without the possibility of parole, after the Washington State Supreme Court ruled that the death penalty violated state constitution.
