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16 Phrases Psychologists Are Begging Parents and Grandparents To Stop Saying to an Oldest Daughter
16 Phrases Psychologists Are Begging Parents and Grandparents To Stop Saying to an Oldest Daughter

Yahoo

time23-07-2025

  • General
  • Yahoo

16 Phrases Psychologists Are Begging Parents and Grandparents To Stop Saying to an Oldest Daughter

16 Phrases Psychologists Are Begging Parents and Grandparents To Stop Saying to an Oldest Daughter originally appeared on Parade. Eldest Daughter Syndrome (EDS) may not be a clinical diagnosis. However, many women felt seen when the term trended on social media last year. EDS refers to the experience of having unique—and often age-inappropriate—responsibilities and expectations placed on . Even with all we know about gender norms and stereotypes, psychologists warn that these beliefs are still alive and well today."Parents and grandparents may communicate differently with the oldest daughter because they may view the oldest daughter as the 'second matriarch' of the family," warns Dr. Emily Guarnotta, Psy.D., the co-founder of Phoenix Health. "Some families may view the oldest daughter as more mature and capable than other siblings and therefore speak to her more like a peer rather than a child."(Not so) Good 'ole cultural norms are largely to blame for these expectations, and they can manifest in daily conversations with this child. For this reason, psychologists are urging parents and grandparents to daughters. They also share the one, simple phrase that oldest girls need to hear 16 Phrases To Avoid With Eldest Daughters, According to Psychologists 1. "Why did you let your sibling do that?" , a licensed psychologist with Thriveworks, says this phrase usually references maturity and responsibility that an eldest daughter does not own."Yes, as an older sibling, it seems natural to expect that person to chip in at times, but the reality is, the oldest daughter is not a parent and does not need to have parentified roles or expectations," she suggests pausing before using this phrase to ensure that it falls within the "scope" of sibling-hood. "Why did you let your sibling do that?" may fit if the daughter told their younger brother to draw on themselves in permanent marker, knowing that it went against house rules. However, it wouldn't meet the moment if a younger sibling jumped off the couch while a parent was doomscrolling in another 2. "Can you help your sibling with that?" Again, context matters here. Sometimes, this phrase is empowering. Other times, it misplaces responsibility."While encouraging a child to help their siblings from time to time is important, relying too much on older daughters to care for their younger siblings puts them in the role of a surrogate parent," Dr. Guarnotta adds that the blurred line between sibling and parent can negatively affect an oldest daughter's relationship with their sibling and caregivers. 3. "Help me with the little ones." And other times, parents and grandparents don't bother to ask the oldest daughter to help. They just tell them. Once again, this phrase puts a child into a "junior Mom" role, and it has the potential for long-term harm rather than empowerment."She then understands that her worth is tied to helping and love comes with being useful," reveals Dr. Gayle MacBride, Ph.D., LP, a psychologist with Veritas Psychology Partners. "She then may focus on this and not her own developmental journey."Related: 4. "Be a good example." This one is well-intentioned, but Dr. MacBride says it gives the eldest daughter the impression she has little room for error."She now has learned that her role is not just to grow and learn, but she has to do it perfectly because she is the example that someone else is going to copy off of," she explains. "Her mistakes are not personal, but they are on display for others." 5. "Be a good girl." It may sound like a valid request to some, but it has a nails-on-a-chalkboard effect for at least one psychologist."'Be a good girl' quickly becomes loaded, especially for the child who already feels pressure to be calm, pleasing and responsible," explains . "It subtly implies that goodness is tied to behavior, and that mistakes or boundary-setting make her somehow bad."She prefers, "Make kind choices," which is less likely to set off a lifetime of chasing 6. "You ought to know better." Your eldest daughter is not David Coulier (who is widely believed to be the inspiration for Alanis Morissette's "You Oughta Know")."The assumption here is that older equals wiser, but these are kids and not 'mini-adults,'" Dr. MacBride says. "Give all kids the grace to grow at their own pace." Danny Tanner and Uncle Joey would approve of this message. 7. "This gives you good practice with what it's like to be a wife and a mom." This one is loaded with a capital L."These comments infer an expectation that your daughter will marry and have children," Dr. Smith reports that your daughter may alsowant that for herself, and it may happen. However, she may envision and even choose another path because she doesn't want that, all while hearing these phrases on repeat. As a result, she may start to doubt herself and fear disappointing her loved 18 Phrases To Use With Your Adult Kids That Will Transform Your Relationship, According to Psychologists 8. "You're so grown up." It's not quite the compliment people think it is."This phrase is actually starting to rob a child of her childhood," Dr. MacBride reveals. "We say this and then give ourselves permission to offload more responsibility onto the child. It can create pressure for her to become an adult more quickly than she feels capable."Related: 9. "You're so smart." You may be surprised to see this one here, and it's proof that even well-meaning parents and grandparents have blind spots."While meant as praise, this statement can reinforce a fixed mindset, suggesting that intelligence is something she is rather than something she builds," Dr. Todey says. "Instead, I coach parents to cultivate a growth mindset by reinforcing effort, encouraging mistakes and failure as part of the learning process."She recommends praising a child's hard work, persistence and curiosity so that they embrace challenges rather than avoid them, thereby overcoming their fear of 10. "Don't be so sensitive." Remember, emotions are human."This phrase is very invalidating and communicates that her feelings are 'too much,'" Dr. Guarnotta says. "As an adult, she might have a hard time trusting her own emotional responses. It can lead her to suppress her feelings and hinder her ability to express herself in a healthy way."Related: 11. "Stop being dramatic." In related news, this phrase can also promote emotional suppression."For oldest daughters who are frequently expected to keep it together, this invalidation can create confusion and emotional shutdown," Dr. Todey says. "I recommend helping children build emotional awareness by teaching them to evaluate the size of the problem and reflect on whether their reaction matches the situation."She notes that the goal isn't to downplay big feelings but to give girls tools to help them understand how to cope without shaming themselves. For instance, dropping a cracker on the floor may be upsetting, but it's fixable and learning to take a deep breath in frustrating moments is a good life 12. "You're stronger than that." Dr. Todey says parents often use this one during meltdowns."Parents may mean it as encouragement, but it unintentionally shames vulnerability," she warns. "For the daughter who's already trying to be emotionally regulated, this statement can unintentionally imply that feelings make you weak."Instead she suggests using the phrase, "This is hard, and you can do it." This phrase is encouraging and validating. 13. "Let it go." Unless you're having a Frozen karaoke session, delete this one from your rotation (Bonus points for discussing how the flick's oldest daughter, Elsa's, parents, however well-meaning, caused harm by locking her away for her powers)."Comments like this one do not permit space for normative emotions when their younger sibling is problematic and has a negative impact," Dr. Smith says. "This comment sends the message that the oldest daughter is 'just' supposed to 'put up' with problematic behavior, which can instill norms and expectations that are detrimental to other areas of the daughter's life presently and as she grows up."Related: 14. "I don't worry about you." This sounds like praise, but it doesn't land that way."It signals that her needs aren't a priority or urgent," Dr. MacBride says. "Being low maintenance just teaches you that your needs don't matter." 15. "You've always been the responsible one." No pressure, right?"This phrase can lock her into a rigid role and make her feel like her worth is tied to taking care of others," Dr. Guarnotta says. "As an adult, she might have a hard time relaxing, delegating and accepting help from others."Related: 16. "You are my rock." Dr. MacBride doesn't think it's fair for parents and grandparents to say this phrase to the oldest daughter—or any child or grandchild, for that matter."Often, the oldest daughter can become the confidant for her mother, as if she is supposed to be her mother's emotional support," she shares. "This is another opportunity for her to learn that she is responsible for making others happy and taking care of their feelings."Related: The #1 Phrase Eldest Daughters Need To Hear The oldest daughter could really use a reminder that "It's OK to make mistakes.""This gives her permission to be a child and not carry the weight of the world on her shoulders," Dr. Guarnotta says. "It reminds her that life is a learning process and she is loved for who she is, rather than what she does for others."Dr. MacBride agrees."I think it's important to counteract the messaging that oldest daughters get from parents, grandparents, and even media with a reminder that it's 'OK to not be OK' and that someone is there to help them with that," she shares. "These girls need a place where their feelings are validated and someone can see that life is messy, but none of that is contingent on whether they are loved, validated or respected."Up Next:Sources: Dr. Emily Guarnotta, Psy.D., co-founder of Phoenix Health Dr. Brandy Smith, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist with Thriveworks Dr. Gayle MacBride, Ph.D., LP, a psychologist with Veritas Psychology Partners Dr. Amy Kincaid Todey, Ph.D., a psychologist 16 Phrases Psychologists Are Begging Parents and Grandparents To Stop Saying to an Oldest Daughter first appeared on Parade on Jul 22, 2025 This story was originally reported by Parade on Jul 22, 2025, where it first appeared.

Uhhh, People Are Stuffing Plain Salad In Their Mouths
Uhhh, People Are Stuffing Plain Salad In Their Mouths

Yahoo

time02-05-2025

  • Lifestyle
  • Yahoo

Uhhh, People Are Stuffing Plain Salad In Their Mouths

Let's be real. Everyone, me included, could do with more veggies in their daily diet. You can always just eat a side salad or throw a serving of broccoli into your weeknight pasta, but these routes require effort, planning, and dishes. Luckily, there's another way making its rounds on the internet (and no, it's not hidden spinach brownies). TikTok user Amy Garrett (@sahmthingsup) is the face of "Dinosaur Time," which might just be the single healthiest internet wellness hack you've ever heard of. Its sole purpose is to add a serving of vegetables to one's daily intake and have fun doing it — by acting like a dinosaur. @sahmthingsup / TikTok / Via Let me explain. Amy takes a moment out of her day right before lunchtime to open up a plastic box of salad greens, grab a giant handful, and go to town. It looks a little something like this: She's conquered spinach, butter lettuce, bok choy microgreens, and more in this fashion. What started as a "lazy girl hack to get your greens in" has blossomed into a true internet phenomenon. Amy has been featured on NPR and made dozens of follow-up videos answering commenters' questions. She's also added the Jurassic Park theme music to her TikToks, of course. Amy described her sole purpose for Dinosaur Time in an FAQ video: mainly, to get more greens into her diet with the least hassle possible. She says she does it before she eats lunch so that she doesn't have to "pretend to like the taste" or go through the effort of incorporating a sufficient serving of veggies into her meal. She also says she doesn't add something like cheese or salad dressing for taste because her "brain is more focused on getting it down" (but to go for it if you want). @sahmthingsup / TikTok / Via Related: A New Study Has Found That 'Eldest Daughter Syndrome' Is A Real Thing, So Call Your Sister And Let Her Know People were kind of mind-blown. Who knew it could be this simple?! This person wrote, "adulthood is just finding increasingly strange ways of tricking yourself into doing what you're supposed to." (I couldn't agree more.) Many people have said they're trying Dinosaur Time for themselves or doing it with their children. I figured adding more vegetables to your life couldn't possibly be a bad thing, but I wanted to get an expert's take on this nonetheless. Related: 19 Wholesome Posts I Found On The Internet This Week That Are So Urgently Needed Right Now BuzzFeed spoke with New York-based registered dietitian Esther Tambe, MS, RDN, CDN, CDCES about the potential benefits of Dinosaur Time and whether it's something people should think about trying for themselves. Esther told BuzzFeed she's "always concerned about TikTok nutrition trends, especially when advice comes from people without proper expertise," but generally supports people getting more vegetables in their diet. After all, only about 1 in 10 Americans eats the federally recommended 2+ cups of vegetables daily. But there are potential pitfalls, too. Esther says that you should consider any medications you might be taking, as some can react poorly with more vitamin K-rich greens in your diet (namely, the anticoagulant drug, Warfarin). She also said that for some gastrointestinal conditions that require less fiber intake, Dinosaur Time might not be a great idea; she recommends speaking with a dietitian "before making significant changes to your fiber intake to ensure it aligns with your personal health needs." Esther also has a gentle warning for those making it a family activity: "I've also seen this trend used to encourage kids to eat vegetables, which can make it fun, but it's important to consider how it might impact their relationship with food," Esther said. "Always consult a qualified professional to ensure a trend is right for your needs." Another creator, Jordynn Nicholson, has been on the handful-of-spinach train since at least last year. She had two videos go super viral a couple of months ago and hasn't slowed down taking what she calls her daily "vitamin." In one of her videos, Jordynn says she's doing it because she learned that the first thing you taste and digest "sets the tone for your cravings for the rest of the day." She proceeds to munch some salad mix straight from the strainer, followed by eggs, toast, and sausage. @ / TikTok / Via So, BuzzFeed also asked Esther whether there's any truth to the idea that the first thing you eat "sets your cravings." Her answer? Not really. "Nutrient-dense foods like leafy greens are high in fiber, which promotes fullness and satiety," she said. "However, this is not a guaranteed way to reduce cravings or make your food choices healthier throughout the day." The bottom line is that Esther "wouldn't necessarily recommend following" trends like Dinosaur Time, but does support eating more veggies in general. "Greens like spinach, kale, and collard greens are great for boosting fiber and overall nutrition, but they're not the only vegetables that provide these benefits," she said. "If you're not a fan of spinach, don't feel like you have to force it down! Plenty of other vegetables can offer fiber, vitamins, and other nutrients," Esther said. She also emphasized that "nutrition is highly individualized" and that it can be confusing to understand how many servings of vegetables you should be eating. "A good guideline is to include at least one serving of vegetables and/or fruit (one cup raw or cooked) with each meal and snack. Aim to fill half your plate with vegetables or fruit, and vary your colors daily (green, orange, red, yellow, white, purple/blue)." So, friends, whether they're blended in a shake, dressed in a salad, or munched straight from the container — make like a dinosaur and eat your vegetables. Let me know how you're getting your greens in the comments. Also in Goodful: 19 Wholesome Posts I Saw This Week That Were So Cute, They Legitimately Put Me In A Happier Mood

Fitness Experts Are Absolutely Dragging The Mel Robbins Podcast For Claiming Women Need To Be Able To Do 11 Push-Ups
Fitness Experts Are Absolutely Dragging The Mel Robbins Podcast For Claiming Women Need To Be Able To Do 11 Push-Ups

Yahoo

time02-05-2025

  • Health
  • Yahoo

Fitness Experts Are Absolutely Dragging The Mel Robbins Podcast For Claiming Women Need To Be Able To Do 11 Push-Ups

If you're into podcasts, you've probably heard of the hugely popular Mel Robbins Podcast, which is currently the No. 1 podcast on Apple Podcasts and is in the Top 10 podcasts on Spotify. If you aren't familiar, Robbins is a motivational author, speaker and podcast host who regularly talks about mental health topics such as anxiety, stress and confidence, as well as physical health topics such as disease prevention and women's fitness. Her podcast episodes often inspire lots of conversations and even lifestyle changes, and a March episode of the podcast was no different. On the episode, podcast guest Dr. Vonda Wright, who is an orthopedic surgeon and longevity expert, shared with Robbins the weekly exercise regimen that all women should follow: It included walking a total of three hours each week (broken up over at least four days), lifting heavy weights at least twice a week, and learning 'to lift your own bodyweight' — which according to Wright means all women should be able to do 11 push-ups. Robbins asked if those push-ups could be done on your knees, and Wright replied, 'No.' The 11 push-up idea quickly caught the attention of women across the country, who took to social media to try the challenge. But do all women really need to be able to do 11 push-ups? Or are there better measures of fitness? Below, trainers share their honest thoughts on this 11 push-up challenge: No, all women should not be able to do 11 push-ups. Related: A New Study Has Found That 'Eldest Daughter Syndrome' Is A Real Thing, So Call Your Sister And Let Her Know According to Katie Gould, the founder of KG Strong, a strength-training gym in Philadelphia, the idea that all women should be able to do 11 push-ups likely comes from a 2019 study of 1,100 male firefighters that found that men who could do more than 40 push-ups had a lower risk of cardiovascular disease compared to men who could do fewer than 10 push-ups. 'So, these findings aren't really directly ... applicable to women,' Gould noted. Danielle Repetti, the founder and head coach at Iron and Mettle, a women's strength training gym in San Francisco, agreed and said the 11 push-up number feels arbitrary. Gould also questioned how fast people were doing the push-ups, which can make them easier to do, or if they were doing them with resistance, which can make them tougher, and if they even had proper form. 'If you're doing three super slow push-ups, to me, I would say that that's an even greater indicator of strength than doing 11 improper form fast push-ups,' Gould said. 'I've had clients that can bench press 100, 125 pounds, and they aren't able to do 11 push-ups on their toes, and that doesn't mean that they're not strong, and it doesn't really mean anything about them as people in a body,' Repetti said. Both Repetti and Gould said there are many reasons why a fit, strong person can't do a chest-to-floor push-up. Maybe they just had a baby, have wrist issues, have larger bodies or are older, Repetti said. 'I'm not going to ask them to do a full-range push-up. It doesn't feel good, it hurts. So that's not how we're necessarily going to strengthen their upper body,' said Gould. 'We're going to do single-arm floor press, or we're going to do a plank and hold that. There's so many other exercises that can build your upper body if a full-range hands-on-floor push-up isn't accessible to you,' Gould noted. Your strength goals should be personal and should make you feel good. Related: "I Had To Be Held Down By Two Nurses": Women Are Sharing Their Absolute Worst Experience In A Doctor's Office While it's important to have benchmarks when it comes to bettering your health and fitness, it doesn't mean one across-the-board benchmark is right for everyone, noted Gould. 'Your personal goals are really going to be the determining factor for what your benchmark should be. Not everybody's goal is going to be to do 11 push-ups,' Gould said. 'Strength goals should be personalized, and while push-ups are a really valuable measure of upper body and core strength, they're not the only indicator of fitness, and they're not a sole indicator of health conditions,' Gould added. Plus, your strength goal shouldn't make you feel bad. That will only discourage you from returning to a workout class or personal training session in the future. 'Any time we embark on a strength journey, I think it's really important to feel good about your body while you're doing it, and not look at it from the lens of 'Oh, I failed and that means something about me and my body,'' Repetti added. An 11 push-up challenge is a fast-track way to feel discouraged if you can't hit the number. Everyone expresses strength in different ways, and everyone has different places where they excel and where they struggle, Repetti said. 'If you go and do the push-ups and you can't do it ... I just really want women to know that doesn't mean anything about you and your own strength,' Repetti noted. In strength training, you'll find the movements that you're great at and not so great at. 'It's important that women don't think of the push-up as being the end all be all,' Repetti added. But push-ups do have benefits when it comes to healthy aging and building strength. 'So, push-ups work pretty much all the muscles in the upper body — chest shoulders, triceps, those are all parts of the horizontal pressing motion, and then push-ups also challenge our core,' Repetti said. Push-ups benefit your posture, your functional strength, and can help with daily activities like lifting things, pushing things away, pulling yourself up and even boosts your bone density (which is crucial for women as they age and bone density drops), said Gould. Push-ups can also help you have the strength to push yourself off the ground, whether you're playing with your grandkids, your pets, or if you fall down, both experts said. Like all strength training, push-ups can help you continue to do the things you want to do as you get older, such as move around your home, go up and down stairs, even dance. 'How you feel in 50 years is kind of dependent on some of the things you're doing now,' Repetti said. 'We really want to build as much strength as we can so that ... we don't have to be one of those people who are like, 'Oh, I used to do that, and now I don't anymore because my body doesn't feel good when I do that.'' If you do want to be able to do push-ups, there are steps you can take to get there. So, not being able to do a push-up (nonetheless 11) on your toes doesn't mean anything about you or your fitness, but if you do have a goal to be able to do some push-ups, the trainers who spoke with HuffPost have some tips. First, you can try to do push-ups on your knees, but Gould said she prefers an incline push-up as a way to build your upper body strength. For this type of push-up, you'll want to put your hands on an elevated surface like a bench or box, said Repetti. Or, you can even do it with your hands on your couch. This way, you're moving less of your body weight while still maintaining a push-up position. You can also see your progress as you move to lower and lower surfaces, said Gould, 'and that is a big thing for me with my clients.' These modifications allow you to 'train the full range of motion and get the most out of learning that movement,' noted Repetti. 'So, once you strengthen some of those muscles, then the push-ups in and of themselves get easier,' Repetti said. 'We want to essentially make the movement easier at first, so that our body can learn how to do it, and then slowly and gradually over time, make that movement more and more challenging.' 'I would consider a push-up on your toes one of the more challenging variations of the push-up,' Repetti said ― and noted that you can make a push-up even harder by adding weight. 'But, for most people, I think learning some of the easier variations and then slowly building up to push-ups on your toes is the best way to get better at push-ups,' she said. And, if you find that you can't hit 11 push-ups even with some additional training, that's OK. There are other ways to get strong and stay strong — what matters most is that you find a sustainable strength regimen that makes you feel good and keeps you article originally appeared on HuffPost. Also in Goodful: 19 Wholesome Posts I Saw This Week That Were So Cute, They Legitimately Put Me In A Happier Mood Also in Goodful: 19 Wholesome Posts I Found On The Internet This Week That Are So Urgently Needed Right Now

Doctors And Medical Professionals Are Sharing The Medical Questions Friends Asked That They Wish They Hadn't
Doctors And Medical Professionals Are Sharing The Medical Questions Friends Asked That They Wish They Hadn't

Yahoo

time02-05-2025

  • Health
  • Yahoo

Doctors And Medical Professionals Are Sharing The Medical Questions Friends Asked That They Wish They Hadn't

If you're a doctor, nurse, paramedic, or some adjacent medical professional (no matter how adjacent), you've probably encountered many questions from your family, friends, or even strangers about their random medical ailments. I, too, am guilty of being the concerned friend asking my doctor-adjacent friends what to do about my problems — still, I try to ask within reason!!! So, when I came across this Reddit thread that asked, "Doctors of Reddit, what is a medical question a friend has asked you that you wish they hadn't?" I was very curious about the kind of asks I should probably steer away from. Here's what everyone shared: 1."Mum's friend showed me her MRI scans at a dinner party ahead of seeing her neurologist. The report and pics showed features consistent with multiple sclerosis. There was no way I was having that conversation with her, so I feigned stupidity and said it was outside my knowledge area and told her to discuss it with her doctor instead. My mom was mad at me for pretending to be dumb. I made it clear that under no circumstances would I be giving any ad hoc medical advice to her friends moving on." —Unusual-Ear5013 2."'Can you read my husband's MRI report?'...Report clearly shows metastatic cancer. Oof." —Boogersnsnot 3."Not a proper doctor, but I'm a retired combat medic, and I've been asked a couple of odd questions. At a Christmas party for a charity that my ex used to work with, I got chatting to with the charity's founder. Naturally, we got round to, 'Oh, you're X's partner?' Oh cool, uh, if you don't mind taking a look at something for me...'" "He'd slipped on the stairs a few days earlier, had a bit of an ache in his upper arm, and wasn't sure it was worth going to a doctor. I took a look for him because why not? I'm accommodating. Reddit, his humerus was broken. Midway, by the feel of it, clear through the bone. Not displaced, but it was grinding a bit when he moved his arm. That was a fun one to explain." —ParticlesInSunlight 4."Not a doctor, but rather a critical care paramedic. I had a long-time friend ask me to clarify notes she received from her boyfriend's oncology visit. Just asking me to translate medical speak. It was one of the worst reports I've ever seen, and I was amazed he was still alive. She was super hopeful and obviously wanted the best outcome. I gently told her that I was not the one to go over the report with her. He passed about a week later." —redundantposts Related: A New Study Has Found That 'Eldest Daughter Syndrome' Is A Real Thing, So Call Your Sister And Let Her Know 5."Wishing I had a funny or less depressing answer, but in training, I ended up diagnosing and eventually confirming cancer in a hometown friend when he asked me why he sweats through his sheets every night. He's cancer-free and in remission now, but also doesn't talk to me anymore." —LonelySeeds24 6."I am not a doctor, but I am a respiratory therapist. During one of the waves of COVID, a lab tech's mom was admitted and was on a BiPAP (a type of noninvasive ventilation) with COVID. One night, while we were both working, she asked me how her mom was doing. I told her I didn't want to tell her because I was not going to lie to her. She told me she wanted to know." "'Everyone I have had on this high of settings on the BiPAP has died,' I said. 'That's not to say we aren't going to keep trying, but I want to be realistic with you.' She started crying. She had just lost her grandmother a week prior, so this was pretty rough. Up until that point, apparently no one had been honest enough to tell her just how serious her mom's COVID was." —pwg2 7."Not a doctor but a former anesthesia RN here. The worst question? My mom asking if she was going to be alright, after they found a 2€ coin-sized melanoma on her back. The damn thing was showing dendrites when she finally went to the doctor. The PET scan they did a few weeks later lit up like a Christmas tree. Due to some trial meds, she did make it past two years, which is a miracle on its own. In the end, the cancer won, though." "Second worst question? People asking what the most horrible case I have seen in the OR. It's not really something you want to talk about or want to be reminded of. I usually answer with, 'It's the kids that hit hardest,' and it's so damn true." —DullMaybe6872 Related: 19 Wholesome Posts I Found On The Internet This Week That Are So Urgently Needed Right Now "Occasionally, less often as my circle and I age, someone will, upon finding out that I'm a surgeon, ask, 'What's the worst thing you've ever seen?' The answer is, and has always been, something about which I've been trying very hard to avoid thinking, no matter what that is. The worst thing I've ever seen is very likely something that I can't remember and deliberately so." —themeanestthing 9."I'm a sonographer. I had a friend who was on a sports team with me send me her images from an ultrasound she had performed on a breast mass. It was not good." —thnx4stalkingme a medical student: "Recently visited my parents, and a family friend was over the house, and shoved a phone in my face with MyChart results pulled up. They wanted me to interpret imaging and labs before their doctor contacted them. I held my tongue and refused; their degenerative spine was a trainwreck and had progressed to needing surgery. Not my place to tell them." "...It's bad medicine to diagnose without performing a clinical exam. I hate diagnosing with just a CBC or a blurry phone picture. Better to see the patient and include a physical exam before drawing conclusions. Some things are black and white, but most exist in grey areas. There's nuance and context that that results and imaging simply can't elucidate." —nevertricked And lastly, to end on a lighter note, here are a few somewhat unfortunate and funny entries: 11."I'm going to go with the time that my uncle sent me an unsolicited picture of his anus asking if this was a hemorrhoid or not." —InvestingDoc 12."Had a friend ask me to look at his taint at the height of monkeypox. It was a heat rash." —CSnarf 13."A friend of my then-boyfriend asked me, 'How do you know if you have syphilis?' out of the blue one day. I asked him why he was wondering, and he said he was just curious. Sure, Bert, sure, we're all curious. But if you think you NEED to know if you have syphilis, the chances are high you have been engaging in syphilis-enhancing behavior and should get yourself and your downstairs area checked out. He went to the doctor. He had syphilis." —tryingisbeautiful 14."My wife's cousin wanted me to see if his testicles had shrunk from using steroids. I politely declined." —nycemt83 And lastly: 15."Not a doctor, but a paramedic, and I think this fits all right. I had my dad and mother call me because my dad was dizzy. He was lying down, and they checked his blood pressure, and it was fine. I was doing the questioning I normally would, and I asked him to sit up and take his blood pressure again, and it was low. I asked a few more questions and finally my dad blurts out that he took Viagra and it started right after they "Turns out he took his new blood pressure medication/anxiety medication that day. He had never taken both medications on the same day. Both affect blood pressure, and the combo was most likely the cause of the blood pressure issues. I was glad to help before he walked around and passed out or took them both again another time. But I could have gone my whole life without that knowledge." —cierramaranara Welp, do you work in the medical field and have questions you hate when people ask? Let me know your experiences in the comments or at this anonymous form below. Also in Goodful: 19 Wholesome Posts I Saw This Week That Were So Cute, They Legitimately Put Me In A Happier Mood

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