Latest news with #LCSW
Yahoo
3 days ago
- General
- Yahoo
7 Behaviors That People-Pleasers Don't Even Realize They're Doing, a Psychotherapist Warns
7 Behaviors That People-Pleasers Don't Even Realize They're Doing, a Psychotherapist Warns originally appeared on Parade. "People-pleasing" has become a bit of a buzzword in recent years. While some people think of it as simply being considerate or selfless, others talk about it with a much more negative connotation. However, there's a lot more to this "fawn response" than what most people might realize. Meg Josephson, LCSW, author of Are You Mad at Me? How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You (published August 5), shares that it's important to acknowledge people-pleasing tendencies in order to heal and grow—but it can be tricky to recognize in yourself. "For many, people-pleasing is a survival strategy, and it's a behavior we learned early on as a way to feel safe and accepted," Josephson previously told Parade. Fortunately, she's here to share seven common behaviors that people-pleasers don't even know they're doing. Read on to see if any of these sound 7 Common Behaviors People-Pleasers Don't Even Realize They're Doing, According to a Psychotherapist Josephson reveals that these seven behaviors aren't always super obvious, but they're worth paying attention to and healing from. 1. Overthinking social interactions and wondering, 'Are they mad at me?' "When we're stuck in a fawn response, our safety lies in knowing that other people like us and are pleased with us," Josephson says. "Because of this, we're often hypervigilant in our relationships and even the slightest thing, like them saying 'k' instead of 'okay!' can activate that survival part of us, or when someone sees our IG story but hasn't responded to our text and we may think, 'Did I do something wrong?'"Related: 2. Feeling like we're 'bad' or always about to get in trouble "For many who resonate with the fawn response, we didn't witness anger or conflict dealt with in a safe and regulated way growing up," she explains. "Maybe conflict was dealt with in yelling matches or silent treatment, and then it was brushed under the rug, with no repair or acknowledgment after the fact."This makes a bigger impact than we might realize at the time."When this happens again and again, the child makes sense of it by blaming themselves," she continues. "And over time, we go from thinking 'I did something bad' to 'I am bad.' As adults, this feeling of 'Am I in trouble?' shows up especially in the workplace, fearing that we're about to get fired anytime our boss says, 'Do you have a sec?'"Related: 3. Avoiding conflict at all costs "Similarly, if we've never witnessed conflict handled in a loving way growing up, conflict can feel quite scary," Josephson says. "Often, as an adult, we may avoid conflict at all costs because we believe: 'If I have a conflict with this person, the relationship will be ruined or over, and there's no going back from it.' So we avoid hard conversations, we morph our opinions to match the other person's, so that we can avoid any friction. But actually, a little bit of friction in a healthy relationship is a good thing, because it means there is enough safety and space for differing opinions to exist. It means both people can be themselves, and trust that they can repair the rupture when it arises."Related: 35 Phrases To Set Boundaries Firmly and Fairly, According to Mental Health Pros 4. Overextending ourselves and struggling to set boundaries or say no "The fawn response is rooted in the belief: 'In order for me to be loved, I need to do more. I'm not allowed to have my own needs,'" Josephson explains. "This results in saying yes when we want to say no, silencing what we need and prefer, to make the other person happy. Many fawners overextend themselves and say, 'Well, I'm just being nice!' But when we do this again and again, we can begin to grow quite resentful in our relationships because our needs are never being addressed."Related: 5. Feeling like you're performing in your relationships "One of the people pleaser 'archetypes' in my book is 'The Chameleon,'" Josephson tells Parade. "Because a fawner is hyper-attuned to external approval, they may morph themselves in social situations and mask who they really are so as to not upset anyone. This can leave them feeling like they're always performing, and can result in quite a bit of shame: 'Am I fake? Am I just fooling everyone?'"Related: 6. Feeling like you don't know who you are "A lifelong people-pleaser has likely been so focused on what's happening externally (people's reactions, their moods, their emotions), that they've become completely disconnected from their own inner world: their emotions, needs, desires, opinions and preferences," she explains. "Over time, this can lead the fawner to feeling like, 'Who am I? Who am I when I'm not being perceived and trying to please other people?'"Related: 7. Feeling like you need to manage other people's emotions "For many, managing people's moods and making sure everyone was happy was quite self- protective," Josephson says. "When we're doing it in all of our relationships, it's exhausting. When someone is in a bad mood, a fawner may assume they've done something wrong or that it's their responsibility to fix it. The fawn response says: 'I can't be regulated until you are.'" Up Next:Source: Meg Josephson, LCSW is a full-time psychotherapist with over five hundred thousand followers and millions of likes across social media platforms, and author of Are You Mad at Me? How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You. She holds a Master of Social Work from Columbia University with a concentration in clinical practice and received her meditation teacher certification from the Nalanda Institute in New York City. 7 Behaviors That People-Pleasers Don't Even Realize They're Doing, a Psychotherapist Warns first appeared on Parade on Aug 12, 2025 This story was originally reported by Parade on Aug 12, 2025, where it first appeared. Solve the daily Crossword
Forbes
4 days ago
- Forbes
How Travel Helps You Process Grief, According to Experts
Rear view. Blonde woman in yellow dress getty When grief hits, the instinct is often to retreat. But for some people, changing environments can help create the space needed to begin healing. Grief travel (sometimes called a 'griefcation') is gaining attention as a powerful tool to support the grieving process. Whether it's a solo trip for quiet reflection, a return to a place filled with memories, or a wellness retreat that offers professional support, travel can offer the kind of emotional distance, perspective, and rituals that daily life rarely allows. The blissful moment on top of a mountain getty 'Griefcation isn't a clinical term,' says Lynn Zakeri, LCSW, a licensed therapist based in Chicago, 'but it captures something I've seen again and again, with clients and also in my own life.' She describes it as stepping out of the demands of everyday life—not to escape grief, but to finally give it room to exist. 'To cry without feeling like you have to pull it together… to have feelings and not apologize for them—that's powerful.' Dr. Gail Saltz, Associate Professor of Psychiatry at the NY Presbyterian Hospital Weill-Cornell School of Medicine, agrees that travel can offer relief—but she cautions against treating it as a one-size-fits-all solution. 'It's more recognized in the travel industry than in mental health,' she says. 'For some individuals, travel based in grief recovery can have benefits, but it is not a one size fits all and it is not prescribed as a treatment for grief.' Girl holding heart-shape symbol for love in sunset / sunrise time. getty One of the main reasons travel can support healing is that it interrupts the routines that reinforce absence. 'Most people don't get to grieve 'on demand' between work meetings or school pickups,' Zakeri says. 'Travel offers a pause. The change in scenery quiets the daily noise and lets emotions safely rise to the surface.' That change in environment may also give grief a different texture. 'A very different setting can create enough distance from the day-to-day feelings of loss to allow a more manageable amount of grief to be present,' says Saltz. 'As opposed to being awash in it and overwhelmed.' Zakeri recalls one personal experience where a spontaneous sunrise unlocked tears she hadn't been able to access at home. 'Now every sunrise brings that same person to mind,' she says. 'It doesn't feel unbearable—it feels tender.' Is It Healing—Or Avoidance? Young caucasian man standing in the middle of a prairie with his arms outstretched, enjoying a beautiful sunny day in the nature. getty Not all travel is helpful, though. Experts warn that grief travel shouldn't be used to suppress or deny feelings. 'If travel is used to deny death or to pretend the person is waiting at home, then it's not really processing the grief,' Saltz says. Zakeri draws a line between intentional space and avoidance. 'I've seen families go on fast-paced, distraction-heavy trips just to get through something—like the first holiday season without someone. That's different from making space to feel what you need to feel.' A key sign: If your trip gently invites emotion or reflection, it's more likely to support healing than hinder it. Choosing the Right Kind of Trip Mental support, comforting another person getty Grief is personal—so it makes sense that the best destinations vary widely. Zakeri says some people find comfort in nature: 'The ocean, forests, sunrises… they don't ask anything of you. They just hold space.' Others may want to return to a place filled with memories, or choose somewhere entirely new to explore a future without the person they've lost. 'There's no wrong answer,' she says. 'Just like buying a house, you'll know when a place feels right.' Saltz notes that structured trips with grief support programming can be especially helpful. 'There's no expectation to be 'normal'—grief is understood and allowed,' she says. What to Do While You're There Full length of woman walking on wet sea shore at sunset. Female in sundress is leaving her footprints on sand. Rear view of woman spending strolling on idyllic beach. getty Whether traveling solo or with a trusted companion, incorporating small rituals can deepen the emotional benefit of the trip. Zakeri recommends writing letters to your loved one, journaling one sentence a day, or talking to them out loud while walking. 'I've had clients make playlists, take meaningful photos, or light a candle each night,' she says. 'These rituals don't have to be elaborate. They just need to be yours.' Saltz echoes the value of ritual and memory. 'Memorial rituals can help the idea of lost but present, a celebration of their life, appreciation for what you had with them, and a method of letting them go.' After the Trip Ends Coming home from a grief-focused trip can be emotionally jarring. 'You might think you lost the progress you made,' Zakeri says, 'but that's not accurate. Just because you still feel grief when you return doesn't mean you're not healing.' Both experts recommend carrying something forward—whether it's continuing a journaling habit, joining a support group, or simply holding on to a small ritual— because grief isn't 'resolved' on a trip. 'Grief is a long up and down process,' says Saltz. 'They may have a setback of readjustment again, but they may also have new insight about the loss and feel more accepting of it.' As Zakeri puts it, 'You're allowed to keep grieving and keep living—at the same time.'
Yahoo
07-08-2025
- General
- Yahoo
A Psychotherapist Is Begging Everyone To Stop Believing This Common Myth About ‘People-Pleasers'
A Psychotherapist Is Begging Everyone To Stop Believing This Common Myth About 'People-Pleasers' originally appeared on Parade. These days, it's normal to scroll through social media and see psychologists warning about certain negative behaviors like gaslighting and manipulation. But lately (and perhaps surprisingly), "people-pleasing" has also been getting more attention. Merriam-Webster defines a "people-pleaser" as "someone or something that pleases or wants to please people" or "a person who has an emotional need to please others often at the expense of his or her own needs or desires." And in this age of burnout, overcommitment and validation-seeking, it's more important than ever to dig deeper into the impact of, and the why behind Josephson, LCSW, psychotherapist and author of Are You Mad at Me? How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You (released August 5), is passionate about keeping the spotlight on this behavior—but making sure we're all focusing on the right things. She's begging individuals (and society, as a whole) to stop believing a few common myths related to the way we think about people-pleasing—including the #1 myth she wants to nix for The #1 Myth About People-Pleasers, According to a Psychotherapist "The biggest myth is perhaps the language around it, that it's self-sabotage and something to shame ourselves for," Josephson tells Parade. The way we think about ourselves matters. And for many self-proclaimed "people-pleasers," the negative connotations with this label have greatly outweighed the reality. "For many, people-pleasing is a survival strategy, and it's a behavior we learned early on as a way to feel safe and accepted," she continues. "Because so many people-pleasers already carry such a deep sense of shame and a feeling that something is 'wrong' with them, adding more shame to this pattern isn't necessarily helpful or healing."So, what *is* helpful and healing?"Instead, viewing people-pleasing and the fawn response as something that has protected us—this is where the healing can begin," she explains. "This part of us that people-pleases is scared and wants to know it's safe. And sometimes, we need to fawn. But when it becomes our default way of being, we end up fawning when we're actually safe. Healing is really about acknowledging the ways in which people-pleasing has unconsciously protected us, and starting to become aware of it without adding a layer of shame to it, so that we can notice when it's happening and ask ourselves: 'Do I need to be people-pleasing right now?'"Related: 2 Other Myths About People-Pleasing To Stop Believing Myth: It's a personality trait Nope. "It's a pattern, and we can always change!" Josephson explains. "It takes time to heal. Because the fawn response is usually born out of complex relational trauma (AKA trauma that happened over a long period of time, in the 'small' moments of not feeling safe, heard [and] loved in our relationships), it's going to take time to heal the pattern, and we do so by being in relationships that feel safe. The wound formed in relationships, and the wound will heal in relationships."Related: Myth: Speaking up means you're not being nice "People-pleasers may often say, 'But I can't speak up, I need to be nice!' And of course, this comes from a self-protective place of wanting to be seen as 'good' and 'perfect,'" Josephson shares. "I always like to differentiate nice vs. compassionate. Nice is about being seen as nice, and maybe we're doing something nice on the outside but on the inside, we're resentful and angry. Is that being nice? Compassionate, on the other hand, is coming from an authentic place, where how we're acting aligns with how we're feeling."Wondering how that looks in the real world?"Sometimes, being compassionate means saying no, or being firm," she continues. "Nice is about reducing short-term discomfort and promoting short-term harmony, whereas compassion may lead to discomfort now, but ultimately has more harmony longterm." Up Next:Source: Meg Josephson, LCSW is a full-time psychotherapist with over five hundred thousand followers and millions of likes across social media platforms, and author of Are You Mad at Me? How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You. She holds a Master of Social Work from Columbia University with a concentration in clinical practice and received her meditation teacher certification from the Nalanda Institute in New York City. A Psychotherapist Is Begging Everyone To Stop Believing This Common Myth About 'People-Pleasers' first appeared on Parade on Aug 5, 2025 This story was originally reported by Parade on Aug 5, 2025, where it first appeared. Solve the daily Crossword
Yahoo
07-08-2025
- General
- Yahoo
5 Subtle Signs of Resentment—and How To Let Go, According to a Psychotherapist
5 Subtle Signs of Resentment—and How To Let Go, According to a Psychotherapist originally appeared on Parade. It's a fairly universal experience to deal with annoyances throughout the day—whether it's from specific situations or certain relationships. But there are times when we're not just talking pet peeves and minor frustrations, we're talking resentment and holding grudges. This next-level irritation can take short-term disappointment and turn it into long-term bitterness before you know Meg Josephson, LCSW, psychotherapist and author of Are You Mad at Me? How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You (released August 5), shares exactly how to let go of resentment, and points out five subtle signs of it to look out for in your marriage or other close people may struggle with feeling like it's not a "nice girl behavior" to address an issue or be confrontational with a spouse/partner, colleague, friend or family member. But communicating a boundary or sharing "you've hurt me" can actually benefit both you *and* the person you're speaking with, by allowing your vulnerability to bring you closer together. But even if you don't feel comfortable bringing someone else into a conversation like this, Josephson explains that releasing anger and resentment is still absolutely possible. Related: What Is 'Resentment,' Exactly? "I think of resentment as a messenger, a little piece of information that is saying, 'Hey, slow down. Something isn't right here,'" Josephson says. "Your needs aren't being met, or you're not being heard, and something needs to shift."The key is paying attention to that little messenger."When we can practice acknowledging resentment, we see that it's like our other emotions in that it's fleeting, and once we address it, will often pass or at least come in waves," she How Is Resentment Different from Holding a Grudge? "Holding a grudge, on the other hand, often manifests when we don't address the resentment, either with the other person or we're continuing to ignore it within ourselves," Josephson shares. "Holding a grudge means the resentment is stuck, we're clinging onto it and letting it fester."Fortunately, we don't *have* to cling to it in a negative way. Instead, it can help us learn and grow and adjust our expectations, if needed."We can remember the pain and allow that to inform how we want to be in relationship to the other person—and that doesn't have to mean we're holding a grudge," she continues. "There can be an objective neutrality to it."Related: 5 Subtle Signs of Resentment To Look Out For, According to a Psychotherapist 1. Fake arguments "[This is] the biggest and sneakiest one!" Josephson reveals. "It's a sign that the anger is becoming strong and needs somewhere to go. If we can't talk about it with the other person—either because we genuinely can't have a productive conversation with them, or because we're scared to—the anger will find another way to manifest."Related: 2. Talking behind someone's back/venting about someone constantly "[This is] another way for the anger to go somewhere, and [it 's] often a sign that a need isn't being met," she shares. "These are maybe the things we wish we could say to the other person."Related: 3. Saying yes and immediately feeling annoyed about it "It can be helpful to ask ourselves: 'Why am I saying yes? Is it because I want to or because I'm trying to please the other person and avoid discomfort/disappointment?'" Josephson 4. Feeling stingy or selfish This can look like "noticing yourself not wanting to be generous because the relationship is feeling imbalanced, like you're giving giving giving and it's not reciprocated," she explains. "In a relationship where our needs are getting met, generosity flows and we're not thinking about it transactionally. When we start to feel that way, it's usually something to pay attention to."Related: 7 Warning Signs You're in a Codependent Relationship, According to a Therapist 5. Bodily tension "Do you feel tightness and heat in your body when you agreed to do something with this person? Are you clenching your jaw? Our bodies often hold the emotions that we aren't processing," Josephson 11 Common Signs You're 'Parenting' Your Partner, According to Psychologists Is It Important To Let Go of Resentment? "What I find helpful is, instead of forcing ourselves to try to let it go, focus first on acknowledging it," Josephson tells Parade. "When we allow the emotion to be there when it arises, that practice allows the emotion to pass through us more quickly. We can have curiosity about the resentment: 'What is this telling me about this relationship?' When we've received and heard the message that the resentment is telling us, the need for the resentment fades. Often we try to 'let go' of our resentment but it's really us just shoving it away or ignoring it. Letting go comes with acknowledging it."Related: How To Let Go of Resentment You can use Josephson's "NICER technique" to successfully release resentment. She explains how it works: "Notice the resentment as it arises. Invite it to stay—it's allowed to be here. Have some curiosity around it: What is this resentment telling you? What triggered it? Is there a need of yours that isn't being met? Embrace the emotion, without trying to shove it away, let it be there and thank it for communicating to you. And then, instead of going in circles with resentment, we can shift our focus back to what's real and true right now. 'Now what? What can I do with this information? What is in my control and what's not? Do I need to set a boundary with this person or is that not possible in the context of this relationship? If it's not possible, can I instead just acknowledge the resentment internally and let it be okay that it's there?' Then notice the difference between sitting with the resentment versus sulking in it. Once the emotion passes, the mind may still be torturing you by bringing you through old scenarios and replaying everything. That is the sulking. Notice if you're still ruminating on the stories after the emotion itself has passed." Up Next:Source: Meg Josephson, LCSW is a full-time psychotherapist with over five hundred thousand followers and millions of likes across social media platforms, and author of Are You Mad at Me? How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You. She holds a Master of Social Work from Columbia University with a concentration in clinical practice and received her meditation teacher certification from the Nalanda Institute in New York City. 5 Subtle Signs of Resentment—and How To Let Go, According to a Psychotherapist first appeared on Parade on Aug 7, 2025 This story was originally reported by Parade on Aug 7, 2025, where it first appeared. Solve the daily Crossword
Yahoo
06-08-2025
- Health
- Yahoo
All In Solutions Detox Unveils Enhanced Recovery Programs with Personalized Care in Simi Valley
Simi Valley, Aug. 05, 2025 (GLOBE NEWSWIRE) -- All In Solutions Detox in Simi Valley has announced a significant update to its treatment programs to better support individuals on their road to recovery. The organization is dedicated to providing thorough care and continually improving its services to meet the needs of those seeking help with addiction. This new initiative showcases their commitment to offering various types of support through every step of the recovery process. They are expanding their program to include a wide range of therapeutic options tailored to individual needs. By emphasizing personalized care, All In Solutions Detox in Simi Valley ensures that each person's journey is guided with compassion and expertise. These new options will give individuals greater access to the resources they need as they face the challenges of addiction treatment. Expert input has been a key component in shaping the updated program, which uses proven practices to promote lasting recovery. These methods not only help individuals build healthier coping strategies but also provide tools for maintaining sobriety. This comprehensive support system addresses both the physical and mental aspects of addiction, offering a more rounded approach to recovery. "Our Simi Valley addiction treatment program was designed with one goal in mind - to help the people of Ventura County and the Greater Los Angeles Area stabilize, heal, and reclaim their lives" said Jonathan Goelz, LCSW, MCAP, Executive Director of All In Solutions Detox. "We believe in treating the whole person, not just the addiction, through an evidence-based bio-psycho-social model of recovery. We hold ourselves to a very high standard when it comes to the clinical care we provide, and that's reflected in the outcomes we see with our clients." In addition to enhancing its therapeutic offerings, All In Solutions Detox has introduced family support services. This aims to help loved ones understand and actively participate in the healing process. Family involvement is a recognized factor in successful recovery, and by offering guidance and resources, the organization extends its support beyond the individual receiving treatment. Given the ongoing issues related to opioids and the increased demand for effective treatment solutions, it is vital for addiction service providers to keep evolving. All In Solutions Detox in Simi Valley remains steadfast in its mission to adapt its services to meet the growing needs of its clients. By taking a holistic approach to treatment, they tackle both substance use and the underlying factors of addiction. Detailed information about their comprehensive addiction treatment options can be found at their main site. Making treatment more accessible is another critical focus of the program. All In Solutions Detox is working to reach a broader audience by offering various payment plans and collaborating with insurance providers. This effort aims to break down financial barriers, allowing more people to seek help and take control of their lives. A representative from the organization stated, "Our expanded services demonstrate our dedication to catering to the diverse needs of our clients. We are committed to ensuring that anyone who seeks treatment at All In Solutions Detox in Simi Valley receives full support on their road to recovery." All In Solutions Detox in Simi Valley remains dedicated to its mission of assisting individuals fighting addiction. By improving its services to include personalized treatment plans, research-based methods, and family engagement, the organization creates an environment that fosters healing and recovery. Their ongoing efforts to expand show a strong commitment to positively impacting the lives of those dealing with addiction. For more about their specialized programs and levels of care, please visit the All In Solutions Detox website. ### For more information about All In Solutions Detox, contact the company here:All In Solutions DetoxMichael Maddaloni(818) 938-2177info@ Deodora St, Simi Valley, CA 93065 CONTACT: Michael Maddaloni
