Latest news with #LateNightRoundup
New York Times
5 days ago
- Entertainment
- New York Times
Seth Meyers Braces for Trump's Kennedy Center Honors
Welcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night's highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now. No Wokesters, Please President Trump, who's taken over the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, said on Wednesday that he'd 'turned down plenty' of candidates for its annual honors because 'they were too woke. I had a couple of wokesters.' 'I'm sorry, did he say 'wokesters'?' Seth Meyers said during his 'Closer Look' segment on Thursday. 'A 'wokester' sounds like a car your great-grandfather drove after the war.' 'Also, shout-out to the free-speech warriors going radio silent while the president just fully admits he's punishing artists for their politics. You keep doing you, but only when it fits your worldview, you [expletive] hypocrites.' — SETH MEYERS Trump also remarked that he'd always hoped to receive a Kennedy Center award himself, but somehow never got the call. 'Oh, you were waiting by the phone for a Kennedy Center award? What did you think you were going to get it for? I mean, I know he thought he should have won an Emmy for 'The Apprentice,' but the Kennedy Center honor is for performing artists who have contributed a lifetime to the culture. Did you put out an album we don't know about? Were you in a band called Trumpawampa?' — SETH MEYERS 'You haven't done anything for the arts, and you still sat by the phone saying, 'I think this might be my year.'" — SETH MEYERS 'They don't give these things out for dressing up as a garbage man and dancing to 'Y.M.C.A.'' — SETH MEYERS The Punchiest Punchlines (The Summer I Turned Putin Edition) Want all of The Times? Subscribe.
New York Times
6 days ago
- Entertainment
- New York Times
Late Night Hopes Trump's New Hosting Gig Will Keep Him Busy
Welcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night's highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now. Not So Humbly Accepting the Honor President Trump announced this year's Kennedy Center honorees on Wednesday, along with the news that he will host this year's ceremony. 'Jimmy Kimmel Live' guest host Nicole Byer said she's glad Trump is going to play host. 'I mean, let him host the Emmys, the Grammys, a podcast with Theo Von, ' she said. 'He could be the host at an Applebee's. Anything that distracts him from running this country into the ground.' — NICOLE BYER 'Yeah! Give him something stupid to do to keep him out of trouble. Hosting award shows is what he envisioned being president is in the first place. [imitating Trump] 'I'll now present the award for Sexiest NATO Ally — and congratulations to the women of Latvia!'' — SETH MEYERS 'Well, guys, after naming himself chairman of the Kennedy Center, today President Trump announced this year's honorees, including Sylvester Stallone and the band Kiss. Sylvester Stallone makes sense. I mean, he really deserves it, and when you think about Trump's first seven months in office, the word 'Rocky' definitely comes to mind.' — JIMMY FALLON 'And Trump said he picked Kiss, because 'they're one of the greatest rock 'n' roll bands of all time.' And also 'cause they wear as much makeup as he does.' — JIMMY FALLON 'Giving Kiss a Kennedy Center honor is like giving Garth Brooks a B.E.T. Award.' — NICOLE BYER 'Other honorees include country legend George Strait and disco legend Gloria Gaynor. Trump was like, 'Something for the straights, something for the gaynors.'' — JIMMY FALLON The Punchiest Punchlines (Putin and Trump Take Alaska Edition) 'Meanwhile, Trump's meeting with Vladimir Putin is almost here, and today Trump warned that Russia will face severe consequences if Putin doesn't agree to end the war. Yup, severe consequences. Putin responded, 'Like what, a second meeting?'' — JIMMY FALLON 'Ahead of Friday's summit with President Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin, the White House is reportedly trying to temper expectations. Of course, now the question is, how do you temper nothing?' — SETH MEYERS 'Well, get this — Trump is hosting Putin at a U.S. military base because it's peak tourist season in Alaska, and the options were limited. This meeting could end a war, and Alaska's like, 'Ooh, sorry, but the Marriott conference room is all tied up with a Rotary Club salmon retreat.'' — JIMMY FALLON 'While speaking yesterday about his upcoming summit with Russian President Vladimir Putin, President Trump told reporters that he expects to know whether he can make a peace deal 'probably in the first two minutes.' Or, more likely, he just doesn't wanna stay longer than that: '[imitating Trump] Whelp, we did our best! Thanks for coming in on a Friday!'' — SETH MEYERS Want all of The Times? Subscribe.
New York Times
7 days ago
- Entertainment
- New York Times
Jimmy Fallon Isn't Optimistic About the Trump-Putin ‘Listening Exercise'
Welcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night's highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now. Say What Now? On Tuesday, the White House press secretary, Karoline Leavitt, described President Trump's upcoming Alaska meeting with Vladimir Putin as a 'listening exercise.' 'And we all know listening and exercise are Trump's two favorite things, so this should go well,' Jimmy Fallon said on Tuesday. 'It'll be a listening exercise. Yep, then a series of role-playing games, followed by an hour of trust falls and then Dollaritas at Applebee's.' — JIMMY FALLON 'Today the White House said that President Trump's upcoming meeting in Alaska with Vladimir Putin will take place in the city of Anchorage. Yep, temperatures should be overcast and in the 50s, or as Putin put it, 'Beach weather, baby.'' — JIMMY FALLON 'Meanwhile, Trump said that in his meeting with Putin, he will know probably in the first two minutes whether a deal is possible. It's reassuring when a president talks about ending a war like a Tinder date.' — JIMMY FALLON The Punchiest Punchlines (Taylor Swift Edition) 'Taylor Swift is releasing her 12th studio album. So congratulations, white women, you're finally back on top.' — NICOLE BYER, guest host of 'Jimmy Kimmel Live' 'Americans are like, 'Wait, there's good news out there? I don't know what to do with myself!'' — JIMMY FALLON 'Seriously, we all need Taylor Swift right now, because without her music and her merchandise, we end up doing weird stuff like starting a Labubu collection.' — JIMMY FALLON 'Yeah, following the announcement, Taylor's website immediately crashed. Yeah, and then, out of habit, so did Ticketmaster's.' — JIMMY FALLON 'As of now, we don't know the exact release date, but we do know that no one else is releasing music that day.' — JIMMY FALLON The Bits Worth Watching Seth Meyers skewered his 'Late Night' writers for their worst joke submissions on Tuesday's 'Surprise Inspection.' What We're Excited About on Wednesday Night Sharon Stone will discuss her role in the new action thriller 'Nobody 2' on 'Late Night with Seth Meyers.' Also, Check This Out With small but memorable roles in 'Hacks' and 'Dying for Sex,' Robby Hoffman, an Emmy nominee, has a developed a reputation as a scene stealer.
