Late Night Hopes Trump's New Hosting Gig Will Keep Him Busy
Not So Humbly Accepting the Honor
President Trump announced this year's Kennedy Center honorees on Wednesday, along with the news that he will host this year's ceremony.
'Jimmy Kimmel Live' guest host Nicole Byer said she's glad Trump is going to play host. 'I mean, let him host the Emmys, the Grammys, a podcast with Theo Von, ' she said.
'He could be the host at an Applebee's. Anything that distracts him from running this country into the ground.' — NICOLE BYER
'Yeah! Give him something stupid to do to keep him out of trouble. Hosting award shows is what he envisioned being president is in the first place. [imitating Trump] 'I'll now present the award for Sexiest NATO Ally — and congratulations to the women of Latvia!'' — SETH MEYERS
'Well, guys, after naming himself chairman of the Kennedy Center, today President Trump announced this year's honorees, including Sylvester Stallone and the band Kiss. Sylvester Stallone makes sense. I mean, he really deserves it, and when you think about Trump's first seven months in office, the word 'Rocky' definitely comes to mind.' — JIMMY FALLON
'And Trump said he picked Kiss, because 'they're one of the greatest rock 'n' roll bands of all time.' And also 'cause they wear as much makeup as he does.' — JIMMY FALLON
'Giving Kiss a Kennedy Center honor is like giving Garth Brooks a B.E.T. Award.' — NICOLE BYER
'Other honorees include country legend George Strait and disco legend Gloria Gaynor. Trump was like, 'Something for the straights, something for the gaynors.'' — JIMMY FALLON
The Punchiest Punchlines (Putin and Trump Take Alaska Edition)
'Meanwhile, Trump's meeting with Vladimir Putin is almost here, and today Trump warned that Russia will face severe consequences if Putin doesn't agree to end the war. Yup, severe consequences. Putin responded, 'Like what, a second meeting?'' — JIMMY FALLON
'Ahead of Friday's summit with President Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin, the White House is reportedly trying to temper expectations. Of course, now the question is, how do you temper nothing?' — SETH MEYERS
'Well, get this — Trump is hosting Putin at a U.S. military base because it's peak tourist season in Alaska, and the options were limited. This meeting could end a war, and Alaska's like, 'Ooh, sorry, but the Marriott conference room is all tied up with a Rotary Club salmon retreat.'' — JIMMY FALLON
'While speaking yesterday about his upcoming summit with Russian President Vladimir Putin, President Trump told reporters that he expects to know whether he can make a peace deal 'probably in the first two minutes.' Or, more likely, he just doesn't wanna stay longer than that: '[imitating Trump] Whelp, we did our best! Thanks for coming in on a Friday!'' — SETH MEYERS
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