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Yahoo
17 hours ago
- General
- Yahoo
14 Signs Your Husband Isn't 'Difficult'—He's Emotionally Manipulative
Navigating relationships can be tricky, especially when you're trying to figure out if your spouse is just being "difficult" or if there's something deeper, like emotional manipulation, at play. It's crucial to understand the difference, as manipulation can have long-lasting effects on your mental health and self-esteem. Recognizing these signs can help you make informed decisions about your relationship and take steps towards a healthier dynamic. Here are 14 signs your husband might be more than just difficult—he could be emotionally manipulating you. 1. He Denies The Truth Also known as gaslighting, this is a form of psychological manipulation that makes you question your reality. If your husband constantly denies things he's said or done, or makes you feel like you're overreacting, he could be gaslighting you. Dr. Robin Stern from the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence describes gaslighting as a way to "sow seeds of doubt in your own memory, perception, or judgment". This tactic can leave you feeling confused and powerless. Over time, it erodes your confidence, making it harder to trust your own instincts. If you find yourself frequently doubting your memories or feelings because he insists they aren't valid, this could be a red flag. It's not just an occasional disagreement but a consistent pattern that undermines your sense of self. When you start to believe you're the problem, it's often because the gaslighter has manipulated you into feeling that way. Recognizing this behavior is the first step in reclaiming your mental clarity. Trust your gut if something feels off. 2. He Emotionally Blackmails You Emotional blackmail is when someone uses guilt, fear, or obligation to control another person. If your husband often threatens to leave or harm himself if you don't comply with his wishes, he's using emotional blackmail. This tactic is designed to manipulate you into doing what he wants by exploiting your emotions. It can make you feel trapped in the relationship, as you're constantly worried about the consequences of not giving in. The fear of his threats often keeps you in a cycle of compliance and anxiety. Living under emotional blackmail is emotionally exhausting. It keeps you in a constant state of stress, as you're always trying to avoid triggering his threats. Over time, this can lead to feelings of helplessness and a significant loss of self-esteem. It's crucial to recognize these patterns and understand that his actions are not your fault. Setting boundaries and seeking support can be vital steps in dealing with this form of manipulation. 3. He's Constantly Criticizing You If your husband frequently criticizes you, it might be more than just being particular. Constant criticism can be a manipulation tactic designed to wear down your self-esteem and make you feel dependent on his approval. According to psychologist Guy Winch, Ph.D., persistent criticism can have damaging effects on mental health, leading to depression and anxiety. Being on the receiving end of constant negative feedback can make you feel like you're never good enough. It's important to differentiate between constructive feedback and relentless negativity. Constructive criticism can be helpful, but when criticism becomes a daily occurrence, it's typically not about helping you improve. Instead, it's about gaining control by making you doubt your worth. In healthy relationships, partners support and uplift each other rather than constantly pointing out flaws. If you feel like nothing you do is ever right in his eyes, it's a sign that his criticism is more about control than care. Remember, your worth isn't defined by someone else's opinion. 4. He Gives You The Silent Treatment The silent treatment is a common manipulation tactic used to control situations. By refusing to communicate, your husband might be punishing you or trying to get you to apologize for something you didn't do. This behavior can create a power imbalance, leaving you feeling anxious and desperate to resolve the conflict. It forces you to walk on eggshells as you try to figure out what's wrong. The silent treatment is not a healthy way to handle disagreements and can be emotionally damaging. When communication is intentionally cut off, it becomes difficult to address issues and move past conflicts. This tactic shifts the focus from the actual problem to the discomfort of being ignored. The silent treatment can make you feel isolated and unsure of how to fix things, further increasing your dependence on him. Healthy relationships rely on open communication and mutual respect. Don't let silence be used as a weapon against you. 5. He's Always The Victim If he constantly makes himself out to be the victim in every situation, it's a form of emotional manipulation. This tactic involves shifting blame onto you, making you feel guilty and responsible for everything that goes wrong. Psychologist Dr. Stephen Karpman identifies this behavior as part of the "Drama Triangle", where one person persistently plays the victim to manipulate others. By always being the victim, he avoids taking responsibility for his actions. This can leave you feeling blamed and burdened with fixing issues that aren't your fault. Playing the victim can undermine your confidence and make you question your role in the relationship. It can create a pattern where you're always the one apologizing, even when you've done nothing wrong. This shift in dynamics allows him to control the narrative, keeping you off balance. Recognizing this pattern is crucial for maintaining your emotional well-being. It's important to set boundaries and not take on blame that isn't yours. 6. He Withholds Affection Withholding affection as a means of control is another sign of emotional manipulation. If your husband withdraws love and affection when things don't go his way, it's a red flag. This tactic can make you feel like you're not deserving of love unless you comply with his demands. It creates a cycle of seeking approval and bending to his will just to receive affection. This behavior can erode your self-esteem and create an unhealthy dependency on his validation. Love and affection should be unconditional in a healthy relationship. When affection is used as leverage, it becomes a tool for manipulation rather than a genuine expression of love. It's important to recognize that you deserve affection even when disagreements arise. If you notice a pattern of affection being withheld to control your actions, it's crucial to address this behavior. Love shouldn't be conditional or used as a reward. 7. He's Jealous And Possessive While a little jealousy can be normal, excessive jealousy and possessiveness can signal emotional manipulation. If your husband constantly questions your whereabouts or accuses you of being unfaithful without cause, it's a control tactic. Dr. Craig Malkin, a clinical psychologist, explains that extreme jealousy is often rooted in insecurity and a desire to control. This behavior can make you feel suffocated and untrusted in your relationship. It's important to have mutual trust rather than constant suspicion. Jealousy that crosses into possessiveness can isolate you from friends and family. It creates a dynamic where you feel like you're always under surveillance, monitored for any missteps. This can severely limit your freedom and diminish your sense of independence. Trust should be the foundation of any relationship, not a constant need to prove your loyalty. Recognizing when jealousy becomes a problem is key to maintaining a healthy relationship. 8. He Love Bombs You Love bombing is when someone showers you with excessive affection and attention to win you over. Although it might feel flattering, it's often a tactic to create dependency and gain control. This behavior can quickly turn manipulative, as the initial warmth is replaced with criticism and control. Love bombing can make you feel indebted to him, trapping you in a cycle of highs and lows. The abrupt change in behavior can leave you confused and longing for the initial affection. When someone uses love bombing as a tactic, the relationship often starts with a whirlwind of romance. However, the affection is typically short-lived and used to manipulate you into a false sense of security. Once you're hooked, the focus shifts to controlling you, often leaving you wondering what went wrong. It's important to recognize love bombing and understand that true love develops over time with mutual respect and understanding. Don't be swayed by grand gestures if they're followed by manipulation. 9. He Controls The Finances Financial control is a common form of manipulation in relationships. If your husband restricts your access to money or makes financial decisions without your input, he may be using finances as a tool of control. This behavior can leave you feeling dependent and powerless, as financial independence is a crucial aspect of personal autonomy. By controlling finances, he keeps you reliant on him for basic needs. This tactic can make it difficult to leave the relationship, as you may feel trapped without resources. Financial control often goes hand-in-hand with other forms of manipulation. It can prevent you from making independent decisions or pursuing opportunities that enhance your well-being. When your financial freedom is restricted, it limits your ability to take control of your life. Recognizing financial control is essential for reclaiming your independence. It's important to have open discussions about finances and ensure that decisions are made together as a partnership. 10. He Makes You Feel Guilty If your husband frequently makes you feel guilty for his unhappiness, it's a manipulation tactic. This type of behavior shifts responsibility onto you, making you feel like you have to fix things. It can create a constant sense of obligation, where you're always trying to make him happy at the expense of your own well-being. Feeling guilty for things beyond your control is emotionally taxing and can lead to burnout. It's important to recognize when guilt is being used as a weapon against you. Guilt should not be a tool for manipulation in a healthy relationship. It's natural to feel guilty occasionally, but if guilt is a constant presence, it's likely being used to control or manipulate you. This tactic often involves exaggerated claims or emotional responses designed to make you feel responsible for his feelings. In a healthy relationship, both partners take responsibility for their emotions and work together to address issues. Don't let guilt be used to manipulate you into compliance. 11. He Keeps You Away From Friends And Family If your husband attempts to isolate you from friends and family, it's a sign of manipulation. He may criticize your loved ones or create conflicts to keep you from seeing them. This tactic is designed to make you more dependent on him for social interaction and emotional support. Isolation can make it difficult to get an outside perspective on your relationship. By cutting off your support network, he gains more control over you. Isolation is a powerful tool of manipulation because it limits your access to alternative viewpoints. When you're cut off from loved ones, it becomes easier for him to dictate the narrative of the relationship. This can lead to a sense of loneliness and dependency on him for emotional needs. Maintaining relationships outside of your marriage is crucial for a balanced and healthy life. Recognize the signs of isolation and make an effort to keep your support network strong. 12. He Sets Double Standards Double standards are a common manipulation tactic used to maintain control. If your husband has one set of rules for himself and another for you, it's a red flag. This behavior creates an unfair power dynamic, where he can justify his actions while criticizing yours. The inconsistency in standards can make you feel like you're always in the wrong. It's important to address this behavior and establish equal rules and expectations in your relationship. In healthy relationships, both partners should be held to the same standards. When double standards are present, they create a sense of inequality and undermine trust. This tactic can lead to feelings of resentment and frustration, as you're constantly navigating an unfair playing field. Recognizing and addressing double standards is vital for maintaining a balanced and respectful relationship. Equality and mutual respect are essential components of a healthy partnership. 13. He Overreacts To Small Issues If your husband frequently overreacts to minor issues, it could be a manipulation tactic. By blowing things out of proportion, he creates a climate of anxiety and tension. This behavior keeps you on edge, always worried about triggering his next outburst. It can make daily life unpredictable and stressful, as you're constantly walking on eggshells. Over time, this can erode your confidence and make you doubt your ability to handle situations. Overreacting to small issues often serves to shift focus away from the real problems. It creates a diversion, allowing him to maintain control by keeping you preoccupied with minor conflicts. This tactic can leave you feeling like you're always in damage control mode, trying to prevent the next blow-up. In a healthy relationship, partners address issues calmly and rationally, without resorting to dramatic outbursts. Recognize when overreactions are being used as a form of manipulation and address the behavior. 14. His Behavior Is Inconsistent Inconsistent behavior can be a sign of manipulation, as it keeps you guessing and unsure of where you stand. If your husband is loving and attentive one moment and distant the next, it creates a cycle of unpredictability. This inconsistency can make you feel like you're always trying to earn his affection and approval. It can lead to feelings of insecurity and self-doubt, as you're never sure what to expect from him. This rollercoaster dynamic can be emotionally exhausting and damaging to your self-esteem. Inconsistency in behavior often serves to maintain control by keeping you off balance. When you're unsure of how he'll react, it makes it difficult to address issues or set boundaries. This tactic can create a sense of dependency, as you're constantly seeking reassurance and stability. Recognizing inconsistent behavior as a form of manipulation is crucial for maintaining your emotional well-being. Consistent and predictable behavior is a hallmark of a healthy relationship. Solve the daily Crossword
Yahoo
24-07-2025
- Health
- Yahoo
How much the COVID-19 pandemic aged our brains
NEW HAVEN, Conn. (WTNH) — In today's Health headlines, how much the COVID-19 pandemic aged our brains, the connection between sleep and alcohol consumption in young adults, and how high blood pressure impacts breastfeeding outcomes. Dr. F. Perry Wilson, associate professor at Yale School of Medicine, Yale Medicine physician, and author of 'How Medicine Works and When It Doesn't,' joined Good Morning Connecticut at 9 a.m. to discuss. Copyright 2025 Nexstar Media, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.
Yahoo
17-07-2025
- Health
- Yahoo
Connecticut leaders announce increased funding for Community Health Centers
HARTFORD, Conn. (WTNH) — Connecticut leaders, including Gov. Ned Lamont (D), held a news conference Wednesday morning to announce an increase in financial support for Connecticut's Community Health Centers. Gunshot victim walks into New Haven hospital, police investigating The nonprofit, community-based facilities provide primary and preventative care to everyone, regardless of income or insurance status. Gov. Lamont said that service is crucial right now. 'I think it represents the very best in health care in our country,' Gov. Lamont said. 'Something we ought to try to replicate.' The state's Community Health Centers serve approximately 440,000 people each year. Copyright 2025 Nexstar Media, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. Solve the daily Crossword
Globe and Mail
16-07-2025
- Business
- Globe and Mail
Sturm, Ruger & Company, Inc. to Report Second Quarter 2025 Financial Results on Wednesday, July 30
Sturm, Ruger & Company, Inc. (NYSE-RGR) will announce its financial results for the second quarter 2025 and file its Quarterly Report on Form 10-Q on Wednesday, July 30, 2025, after the close of the stock market. On Thursday, July 31, 2025, Sturm, Ruger will host a webcast at 9:00 a.m. ET to discuss the second quarter operating results. Interested parties can listen to the webcast via this link or by visiting Those who wish to ask questions during the webcast will need to pre-register prior to the meeting. About Sturm, Ruger Sturm, Ruger & Co., Inc. is one of the nation's leading manufacturers of rugged, reliable firearms for the commercial sporting market. With products made in America, Ruger offers consumers almost 800 variations of more than 40 product lines, across both the Ruger and Marlin brands. For over 75 years, Ruger has been a model of corporate and community responsibility. Our motto, 'Arms Makers for Responsible Citizens ®,' echoes our commitment to these principles as we work hard to deliver quality and innovative firearms. The Company may, from time to time, make forward-looking statements and projections concerning future expectations. Such statements are based on current expectations and are subject to certain qualifying risks and uncertainties, such as market demand, sales levels of firearms, anticipated castings sales and earnings, the need for external financing for operations or capital expenditures, the results of pending litigation against the Company, the impact of future firearms control and environmental legislation, and accounting estimates, any one or more of which could cause actual results to differ materially from those projected. Readers are cautioned not to place undue reliance on these forward-looking statements, which speak only as of the date made. The Company undertakes no obligation to publish revised forward-looking statements to reflect events or circumstances after the date such forward-looking statements are made or to reflect the occurrence of subsequent unanticipated events.
The Guardian
16-07-2025
- General
- The Guardian
A moment that changed me: I stopped drinking – and realised what friendship really meant
The conversation began with an apology. I'd rehearsed it many times, trying not to sound too defensive or pitiful. I'd walked through every potential rejection that might come as a result of letting my friend Gillian into a side of my life I'd tried hard to keep hidden. But she had just told me that she wanted to come to visit me in New Haven, so I was cornered. 'I'm sorry,' I said. 'I'm sober now.' I felt embarrassed. 'I have stopped drinking,' I added, to clarify. 'If you visit, I can't drink with you.' In the pause that followed, I imagined her politely trying to work her way out of coming to see me, now that our favourite thing to do together wasn't an option. 'Thank God,' she said. 'You were a nightmare when you drank.' That's the good thing about true friends: they're more likely to be honest than polite. I met Gillian in a pub in Glasgow in 2016, treating my hangover with a vodka and Diet Coke at 11am. We connected over the inevitable heartbreaks and uncertainty we were living through during our mid-20s and our plans to pursue further education in the US, and we got drunk together – often. Drinking had always been practical for me. Without effort, it dissolved the self-conscious, self-critical and awkward parts of myself. It was my support for social situations and making friends, something I had struggled with since secondary school. I'd heard about people who had this kind of relationship with alcohol and that, somewhere down the line, it becomes a problem. I thought I could delay that for as long as possible. I hid my emotional dependence on alcohol in plain sight. I made my drinking a performance, tidying up my sometimes bizarre, sometimes dangerous behaviour into fun anecdotes. I was the wildcard, the bohemian, the hedonist. My days were spent either hungover, drunk or looking to drink. There was a sense of community in that; I could always find someone in a similar headspace, recruit them to my cause and call them my friends. From centre stage, I didn't realise that the people closest to me were tired of The Lauren Show. With time, I started to realise that I drank even when I didn't want to, that I couldn't stop once I started, but I didn't think anyone else noticed. I still thought it was what made me interesting, creative, exciting – the reason people would want to be around me. In my last days of drinking, the anxiety that alcohol could no longer suppress turned to doom. I withdrew, watching the same episodes of BoJack Horseman on repeat in my bedroom. Early recovery was a lonely experience: I avoided most people for fear of what they would think of me as a sober person, someone to whom they could no longer relate. When I spent time with other sober people, I assumed they were just taking pity on me. When you stop drinking, you're confronted with the reasons you started. When Gillian arrived to see me in New Haven, I had to face the fact that I had long avoided emotional intimacy; I was uncomfortable being myself, even around those I loved. I felt vulnerable without alcohol as my armour and got my first taste of what actually goes into maintaining an adult friendship. Gillian and I filled our time together visiting libraries and museums, being present with each other, and talking about so much more than we did when we were busy piecing together nights out that I couldn't remember. To my surprise, we also laughed more during her visit than we ever had before. She wanted to spend time with me – and not a hologram of what I thought she wanted me to be. Alcohol wasn't the bonding agent I thought it was. In fact, it was the thing I was using to keep people at a distance. I realised that drinking was actually a barrier to making lasting connections, but sobriety wasn't – I just needed to get some practice. Friendship is an action and an experience, and trying to numb the parts I found uncomfortable meant I'd never truly experienced the benefits before. After Gillian returned home, I decided to approach my existing friendships with a bit more willingness and honesty. With new friends, whether they were sober or not, I could better get to know them, now that I was no longer obsessing about myself and how I was coming across. Entering my 30s, I have realised that friendship isn't something you can fall into and take for granted; it is a necessity. It's an age when many of us start families and take the next steps in our careers, while our parents often aren't as healthy as they used to be and you can't look for the adult in the room any more, because most of the time it's you. These realities require a support that alcohol can't offer, especially if it makes you unreliable, unpredictable or shut-down. Now when I tell friends – old and new – that I don't drink, I don't feel the need to apologise; I know we'll have a better time without the booze. No Lost Causes Club: An Honest Guide to Recovery, and How to Find Your Way Through It by Lauren McQuistin is published on 17 July by 4th Estate (£16.99). To support the Guardian, buy a copy at Delivery charges may apply
