Latest news with #TacoCat
Miami Herald
5 days ago
- Entertainment
- Miami Herald
Sassy cat abandoned for being ‘too much,' shelter says. Can you handle Taco Cat?
Some animals are the feline embodiment of Jennifer Lopez or any of the daughters on 'Downton Abbey,' but one cat in Colorado sets the entire mold. Meet Taco Cat, a sleek black cat with violent green eyes and an ego the size of … well, a cat's. 'I'll be frank with you, it is utterly exhausting being better than everyone else,' the Humane Society of the Pikes Peak Region in Colorado Springs said in an Aug. 5 Facebook post. Using her words, of course. 'This is not some cultivated persona, no grand performance for the public eye. No, darling … I simply emerged into this world fully formed: magnificent, discerning, impeccably correct about everything,' the shelter said in Taco's tone. 'I didn't ask for the responsibility of raising the standards for feline-kind, but apparently, the universe took one look at me and said, 'Ah yes, her. She'll do nicely.'' Now why the name Taco Cat and not perhaps Lady Charlotteton Diamond Sparkles McDontlookmeintheEye? 'Yes, spelled the same forwards and backwards. A feat of symmetry. A linguistic jewel. Iconic from every angle. It's not merely a name, it's a calling card. People hear it once, and they're done for, ensnared, which is both flattering and terribly tiresome,' the shelter noted. Taco ended up at the shelter due to an unconventional abandonment — like most powerful women, she was more than anyone could handle. 'The official story is that I was 'too much.' Which is a genteel way of saying they couldn't keep up. And to those people, I say: if you think I'm too much, by all means, go find less,' the shelter noted. This could have to do with Taco believing cuddling is far too beneath her and that she must be the one to make the first move when it comes to attention. 'Keep your hands to yourself unless invited. And as for the children in my previous residence… well, their grasp of 'personal boundaries' was more theory than practice,' the shelter mentioned. So, it's best if Taco goes to a home void of sticky-handed little kids and dogs. 'And yet somehow, I'm the difficult one? Please. I simply maintain standards. The other cats here? Practically throwing themselves at the feet of any passing human. I watch it unfold from my perch and can only shake my head. Such desperation is unbecoming,' the cat … er, the shelter said. Taco Cat likes the following, per the shelter: Showing off her ballerina-like leapsPlaytime with a wand toyNobody breathing in her space bubbleQuiet 'I am fully aware that I am a diva. I am Regina George, not Cady Heron. I am not the awkward girl-next-door destined for a saccharine meet-cute,' the shelter observed. 'I am the queen bee, perfectly aware of her crown. But even queens, dear, have hearts. Mine longs not for constant contact or suffocating devotion, but for a… partnership. You read your novel; I lounge in a sunbeam. Our eyes meet across the room in quiet understanding.' For more information, visit the shelter's website.
Time Business News
03-06-2025
- Business
- Time Business News
20 Hilarious Gift Ideas That Make the Best Funny Office Gifts
If you're on the hunt for the funniest office gifts that will have your coworkers talking long after the party ends, you're in the right place. Whether you need a last-minute item for a workplace celebration, a holiday exchange, or a Secret Santa surprise, this list of funny office gifts, funny coworker gifts, and funny white elephant gifts has you covered. Why Go for Funny Office Gifts? Humor is one of the best ways to break the ice, bond with coworkers, and make your workplace a bit more enjoyable. A well-timed joke gift can lighten the mood, improve team morale, and even become the highlight of the office party. With that in mind, let's dive into some hilarious ideas your coworkers will love. 1. Desktop Punching Bag Perfect for those stressful workdays. Just stick it on a desk and let the rage out — quietly and professionally, of course. 2. 'Meeting That Could Have Been an Email' Mug Because we've all sat through one. This mug is passive-aggressive humor at its finest. 3. Mini Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube Guy Straight out of a car dealership ad, but in miniature. It dances, it waves, and it cracks everyone up. 4. Toilet Golf Set Why not multitask during bathroom breaks? A weirdly popular gift and a true conversation starter. 5. Fake Mold Sandwich Bags Great for protecting your lunch — nobody's stealing that old-looking sandwich. Funny Coworker Gifts That Will Win You 'Most Fun Colleague' Award If you're shopping specifically for a teammate or buddy at work, these funny coworker gifts are ideal for birthdays, farewells, or just-because moments. 6. Decision-Making Dice Let your coworker roll their fate—options include 'Ask Again,' 'Take a Break,' or 'Panic.' 7. Memo Pads with Sarcastic Phrases Because 'ASAP' and 'I need this yesterday' don't always cut it. 8. Tiny Hands Set Hand over reports with these and see how long it takes for HR to notice. 9. 'I Survived Another Meeting' Award Ribbon Perfect for your overachieving office buddy who bravely attends all those endless Zoom calls. 10. Custom Bobblehead Send in a picture and get your coworker immortalized — with an oversized wobbling head. Best Funny White Elephant Gifts to Steal the Show For chaotic and fun gift swaps, nothing beats a good funny white elephant gift. These are supposed to be weird, unexpected, and hilarious. 11. Taco Cat Jigsaw Puzzle It's random, it's colorful, and it's confusing — everything a white elephant gift should be. 12. Bathroom Guest Book Let your guests (or coworkers) reflect deeply during their bathroom breaks. 13. Emergency Underpants Tin Yes, it's real. Yes, someone will definitely steal this gift during the swap. 14. Fart Machine A classic gag. Hide it under a desk or chair and let the laughter begin. 15. Miniature Desktop Dumpster Fire The most relatable 2020+ themed gift ever created. Ideal for anyone who says, 'It's fine, I'm fine.' Bonus: 5 More Funny Office Gifts That Everyone Secretly Wants 16. USB-Powered Coffee Warmer (because lukewarm coffee = sad worker) 17. Sarcastic Ball (like a Magic 8-Ball with attitude) 18. Canned Air from Another City (like NYC air, now in a can!) 19. Cubicle Guestbook (for all your 'visitors') 20. 'Out of Office' Desk Bell (ring it and walk away dramatically) Final Thoughts Whether you're shopping for a hilarious Secret Santa exchange, a coworker's birthday, or just to spice up the office vibe, these funny office gifts, funny coworker gifts, and funny white elephant gifts will make sure you're remembered for all the right (and ridiculous) reasons. TIME BUSINESS NEWS
