24-07-2025
Men Share Their Biggest First-Date Red Flags
Sometimes it all lines up on paper. Their profile says you have similar interests, life goals, and it definitely helps that they are a THIRST TRAP! But sometimes the fantasy starts and ends with a profile, and the first date reveals it allll.
So when Reddit user White-Kitten8 asked men, "What's something a woman has done on a first date that completely turned you off regardless of how attractive she was?" I wanted to give us all a PSA. Do you agree with these? Let's see...
"She invited her friend (without telling me) for 'security.' The restaurant was pricey, and she expected me to pay for her and her friend. It was ridiculous. Especially when they both ordered the most expensive things on the menu. I waited for them to order, told the waitress I needed some more time, but asked her to go ahead with their orders. I then went to the bathroom and left."
"She ordered her meal, PLUS a meal and a salad to-go. She was absurdly gorgeous, but the audacity!"
"I told her I was an EMT. Her eyes widened and she said, 'So that means you can get, like, pills and stuff, right?!?!' No. No, I can't. Have a nice life."
"She first showed me a pink bag full of BDSM stuff, and disclosed that it wasn't for me. Then she showed me a picture of her ex-boyfriend's penis in a chastity cage. Yeah, there was no second date."
"She brought her mom, dad, and little brother. They bought tickets behind us in the movie theatre and loomed over us the entire time. Then she got unbelievably upset at me when I didn't want to make out during the movie in front of her entire immediate family. It was so weird."
"After explaining my last relationship ended because I was cheated on, she told me that she didn't believe cheating was that bad, and that she'd cheated on multiple partners. A date has never ended so fast."
"She got a text from someone named 'Ryan' when we were sitting in her car that said, 'We had plans tonight. No call?' Then 'Ryan' showed up at her house, and he was not happy."
"She invited me to her home to have a bottle of wine. I asked what kind she preferred. She said red. So I brought two bottles of something really nice. She said, 'Oh, you brought so much alcohol. I hope you're not thinking we're having sex.' Then she told me how her boss was the most important man in her life, who actually helped her emotionally and physically, and made insinuations on how they were having an affair."
"She yelled, 'Well, this is boring,' in the middle of a crowded restaurant. I didn't even realize she had an issue. We'd been talking up until that point. I finished my food, said I was going to the restroom, I paid for myself, then left."
"She had a smelly apartment with rabbits running around. She also 'needed' to smoke weed before we got intimate. Nothing against weed, but 'needs?' Argh."
"She told me that she's immune to COVID, cause apparently, 'Disease is a state of mind, and if you don't believe you will get sick, you won't. A negative mindset is what lets it in.' Yeah, it's a 'yikes' for me, dawg."
"She started talking about how many kids we were going to have, and when and where she would want our wedding to be. She's married with kids now, so well done?"
"We went ice skating with my friends. She intentionally ignored me the whole time. When she needed help or had a question, she only talked to my guy friends. When I tried to ice skate near her, she said, 'I like to go fast,' and would skate away."
"She took a shot of whiskey in her mouth, kissed me, and squirted the alcohol into my mouth. I wasn't expecting it and choked. Whiskey really burns down the airway."
"I went on a blind date, and once we got into my car, she lit up a cigarette. I don't date smokers, so I told her that it wouldn't work out, and she should get out. She was a smokeshow, both physically and literally. What a shame."
"She complained about her ex-husband incessantly. Literally, the whole entire night. They had been divorced for eight years."
"I kissed her, she kissed me back, then kindly pushed me after about 10 seconds. We talked more, then she kissed me, so I kissed her back, then she pushed me away. After four times, I got tired. When I went back home, she messaged asking me why I didn't push for it more."
"I hooked up with a woman at a friend's wedding, then went to dinner with her the next weekend. Twenty minutes into the date, she asked how much was in my bank account. She got mad and left when I asked why she wanted to know."
"One told me I looked like my bathroom was clean. There wasn't a second date."
"She started picking her teeth with her extremely long nails after eating."
"She got so drunk that I had to look after her. I don't mind drinking, but you are your own responsibility."
"I was at a bar once, and this pretty girl came over and told me she was on a date, but he was boring, so she came over to talk to me. I said, 'Wait…so you just ditched him? Wtf!' Then she got MAD."
"She was more than a little mean to our young waitress, who handled it well, but shouldn't have had to. I was stunned. Particularly as she also worked in the hospitality industry. Maybe it was some sort of weird flex?"
"She bragged about dropping out of high school and having a job that allowed her to rent a room from her mother."
And finally: "She was on her phone the whole time."
In the comments or the anonymous form, tell me the biggest question mark, red flag, or pet peeve someone has shown on a first date. For me, I don't like it when people aren't upfront about their interest in you and frame a date as "hanging out." My now-husband asked me on a date the second time we met, and his blunt intentions were veryyyy sexy.
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