Latest news with #adjustment
Forbes
a day ago
- Business
- Forbes
2 Consequences Of Moving Because Of Your Partner, By A Psychologist
The decision to move with a partner, or especially, for a partner, carries significant weight. It also carries some risk — adjusting to a completely new environment, building a new social community and retaining your sense of individuality and personal ambition in the process are all critical factors to consider. For some couples, moving somewhere new together is a simple matter of saying 'Where you go, I go.' There's no question about it. But when a couple has gotten together only recently, or either partner absolutely loves their lives right where they are, things begin to get complicated. A move could mean job loss, housing challenges and unforeseen financial stress. This, in turn, can impact the relationship itself, creating uncertainty about its future as well as each partner's life trajectory. So, how do you decide whether it's the right choice for you? A new study published this month in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin addresses the reality of relocating with a partner to support their career, highlighting the emotional consequences both partners face, including both rewards and stressors. Researchers surveyed over 200 couples two months prior to relocation and then at quarterly intervals for one year post-relocation. They studied the impact of partnered relocation across four domains: Here are two insights researchers can offer into the impact of partnered relocation, based on this study. 1. Moving Can Be Highly Stressful, But The Stress Subsides Researchers found that the effects of relocating were somewhat of a mixed bag. In the early stages of the move, participants reported moderate levels of stress across all domains. They felt that losing meaningful social connections — moving away from family and close friends — and managing the finances and logistics of the move were among the most stressful outcomes of relocating. However, researchers also highlight something that most other research on partnered relocation tends to overlook — people adapt. It might take time, but it isn't stressful forever, and positive experiences can co-exist with feelings of stress. Essentially, it might not be the best to begin with, but it's not necessarily the worst. As couples settle into new routines and gain more control over their lives, their stress also subsides. Time and a sense of stability can ease the challenges of relocation. 'While the early stages of relocation may be characterized by logistical burdens, social isolation, and job-related stress, later stages may involve a greater appreciation for new opportunities, stronger connections, and a sense of mastery over challenges. For instance, starting a new job or moving into a new home can be both stressful and rewarding — stressful due to uncertainty or disruption, and rewarding due to novelty and growth,' the researchers explain. Interestingly, researchers also found that couples who were more satisfied in their relationship fared better across the four domains of relocation, facing lower levels of stress in the early stages, steeper declines in stress levels as time went on and a more consistent sense of reward across the domains. So, a solid foundation in your relationship sets the stage for a solid future, despite the chaos and upheaval of a move. Relocating partners must navigate these complex feelings of loss and gain, all at once. While it's important not to minimize the grief you might experience leaving familiar spaces behind, these findings highlight how it's possible to look forward, and embrace a new era of your lives together. 2. Moving Can Be Rewarding In Unexpected Ways New experiences can bring unexpected positive change in one's life. Researchers found that in some domains of relocation, moving was more rewarding than stressful. Participants found that experiences like starting a new position, learning about a new culture, moving near family, making new friends, settling into a new home and experiencing a higher standard of living were all deeply rewarding aspects of their move. However, there may be differences in the experiences of the partner who initiates relocation (the relocator) and their accompanying partner. For instance, while the relocator may be thriving at their new job, the accompanying partner may be reeling from the loss of their previous career opportunity. At the same time, the relocating partner may also struggle with the impact of their decision. 'Relocators may carry the burden of guilt and responsibility for changes made to the couple's lives, which can create additional stress,' the researchers explain. Interestingly, researchers also found that the rewards of relocating could ebb and flow with time. 'Some rewards declined over time — especially those associated with novelty such as starting a new job and adjusting to a new culture. Meanwhile, rewards that were slower to emerge, such as financial stability or relief from previous social obligations, increased slightly as time progressed,' the researchers explain. This variability highlights how the positive effects of novelty may begin to fade, but other surprising benefits may emerge. At the end of the day, the emotional experience of relocation also depends on how a couple handles stress together, how prepared they are for the transition and the intention they put into making the best of their move. So, relocating for a partner has clear pros and cons, depending on the unique nature of your transition. The ultimate decision lies with you, and it's crucial to respect your own needs in the process, even though you wish to honor your partner's too. You must discern whether the move will help you grow, or only hold you back. The key to successful relocation may be in ensuring that it benefits both partners, and that both feel supported through this life transition. Self-sacrifice can easily turn into resentment, which is why the decision to move needs to be mutual. Researchers also suggest that focusing on the rewarding aspects of personal growth, togetherness and novelty can help couples find meaning and joy through this transition, regardless of who initiated it. Partners can find mutual support systems, navigate new cultures together and choose to be a united front through the ups and downs they face. By sharing their fears, excitement, insights or even their culture shocks, partners can focus on what brought them there in the first place — their relationship and their desire to keep 'doing life' together. New destinations invite new experiences. How open are you to such change? Take the science-backed Openness To Experience Scale to find out.
Forbes
5 days ago
- Forbes
2 ‘Compatibility Tests' For Your Relationship, By A Psychologist
Meeting someone compatible can be difficult, but being with anyone requires mutual adjustment from both sides. It's not just about finding someone who 'gets' you, but rather knows how to handle boredom, conflict and daily stressors. Compatibility may look different to everyone, but some values stand true for all. Here are some questions that help you determine how compatible you are with your partner: Here are two ways to answer these questions of compatibility in real life, and assess the strength of your relationship. 1. The Vacation Compatibility Test Travelling together stands out as a powerful way to put relationships to 'test.' This is because travelling often puts us in new environments and situations where our 'true colors' come to light. You'll likely see your partner at their best and their worst. Travelling together reveals how you two solve problems together, how planned or spontaneous you are and how you emotionally regulate yourselves. For instance, one partner saying 'I'm good with anything' while you struggle to pick out a restaurant, only for them to reject your cuisine choices more than once, may make you want to give up on the spot. During your next vacation, ask yourselves these questions to reflect on key aspects of your relationship: There are, in fact, some traits that 'win' the vacation compatibility test. A 2025 study published in Tourism Review explored the personality traits and conflict styles that are most important for keeping relationships strong during travel. They found that displaying openness, agreeableness and being obliging as a conflict resolution strategy is essential for relationship maintenance. If you prefer to go with the flow, for instance, you can try to be more agreeable to your partner who prefers a planned schedule for the day. But if you're the organized one, being open to new experiences can reduce friction with your partner, while you find new ways to enjoy the trip. A 2015 study published in the Journal of Travel Research also found that vacation satisfaction is linked to relationship satisfaction and commitment. So, if done right, vacations can bring you closer. 2. The Live-In Compatibility Test Living together is an important decision that requires a lot of foresight, trust and commitment to your partner. It turns out, relationship outcomes vary based on the intent behind this decision. Are you living together as part of the dating process? Are you living together with clear plans for a future together? Or is it out of pure convenience? Research published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships studied over 13oo never-married couples who live together. Researchers found that engaged couples who are aligned on marriage plans had the best relationship outcomes, whereas couples with mismatched goals on marriage were the least satisfied and had more conflict. So, before the two of you agree to move in together, discuss whether you're on the same page about marriage. While many couples tend to live together due to financial constraints, do not live with someone just to relieve economic burden or because it 'just happened.' Your intent to move in should stem from genuine feelings and love for them. Once you do move in together, you'll start to find out more about your partner, their qualities and quirks. It's worth having early, detailed conversations about things like routines, finances, household rules and personal space. Try to figure out answers to these questions: Living together brings out how you both navigate the everyday nitty-gritty. The rules can change, but the important thing is that you're both okay with the system you build for yourselves. Once you do, you get an idea of the big picture: Can I do life with this person, not just the fun parts, but also the mundane and the messy? Travelling and living together give you enough time to find out each others' habits, strengths and areas for improvement. It tells you how 'safe' you feel around them (do you still run to the bathroom or balcony just to fart or can you be in the same room and laugh it off?) and how well you solve problems, from splitting chores to figuring out the best path on a hike. You learn if you can spend time apart as well as you spend time together, and how much time apart is best for both of you. While compatibility comes naturally to a large extent, partners can also learn to be better for each other with time. They can learn to compromise, adjust to each other's routines and fulfil each other's needs. Compatibility often requires evolution, and can grow as the relationship does. Are you and your partner truly compatible? Take this science-backed test to learn where your relationship stands: Relationship Satisfaction Scale
Yahoo
20-06-2025
- General
- Yahoo
I moved 22 hours away to start a new job. A couple I met by chance took me in, and now they're like family to me.
I was excited to start a new job in a new city, but also a bit nervous. A chance meeting with a couple in a cable store turned into a years-long friendship. Their kindness helped me adjust to my new surroundings. When thinking about family, whether they are distant relatives or close loved ones, we rarely would consider outsiders, let alone strangers. But that hasn't been my experience. While it may sound like a lot of work, making new genuine connections can be easy; sometimes it's as simple as finding a common interest with a person. As random as it might sound, that's exactly how I was able to meet a lovely couple at a cable store in Nebraska. For someone who had just moved 1,500 miles away from my hometown of Virginia to work as a journalist for the local news station, the last thing I ever expected I'd do is talk to strangers. But in retrospect, everyone was a stranger, including my new coworkers. After a 22-hour drive from Virginia Beach to Kearney, my parents and I had finally made it to our destination, and all that I could think about the entire way, as we reached each city limit sign was "What have I done?" My parents were about to drop me off in the middle of nowhere. "Why aren't they stopping me?" I thought as we got closer. It was bittersweet — celebrating a huge accomplishment, stepping into my career, all while getting emotional at each restaurant during the road trip. It wasn't until then that I realized the importance of spending time with family. The smallest things made me cry: watching my dad go up to the breakfast buffet at Shoney's for seconds and thirds, and seeing my mom ask for French vanilla coffee creamer. I contemplated telling them just to take me back home, but I had to commit to my decision. Picking up my keys from the apartment leasing office seemed to be the only thing that could cheer me up — sure, I was sad, but who wouldn't feel accomplished moving out of their parents' house? They were set to fly back home that following Monday, so helping me get settled was our main goal for the next few days. Everywhere we went, it felt as though we stood out as a Black family in Kearney. But like most talkative dads, mine didn't care, and he'd have small talk about sports with random people to get a feel of the environment. Setting up my cable service was a priority. Little did I know, it would be a turning point for me. As we were choosing cable plans, my dad started chatting with a white couple who were also setting up their services. They began telling us the ins and outs of living there — helpful information that I needed to know. A few people shared insights with me on the area, but to hear it from actual residents made a huge difference. As a Black woman in her early 20s moving to a strange place, the couple made me feel welcome. They were aware that I relocated for work and shared that their daughter had also just moved for college, so we had something in common. Assuming that the connection was just a one-off situation where I'd never hear from them again, they proved me wrong. My mom and the man's wife became Facebook friends, which made me even more comfortable with the idea of reaching out. After all, the connection was completely normal, just two mothers posting about how much they love their kids. After months of living in Kearney, finally accepting that I needed a wholesome bond to make me feel at home, I decided to take the couple up on an offer to go to church together. And there I was on a Sunday morning with people I met at a cable store. Was I nervous? Of course. But about 20 minutes into the service, it hit me that there are genuinely good people in the world. So when they invited me out for brunch afterwards, there was no hesitation in my mind — I even rode with them to the restaurant. On the ride, they shared more details about the area, helping me to become more acquainted with my environment. They made me feel comfortable, and at home, something I needed at the time. Since moving back to Virginia, our relationship has been limited to Facebook updates, but at least I know that I will always have family in Nebraska. Read the original article on Business Insider
Yahoo
25-05-2025
- Business
- Yahoo
Gemini Daily Horoscope Yahoo Life Astrology: May 25, 2025
Your bills and accounts need some adjustment, so now is a good time to roll up your sleeves and get down to the (boring) work at hand. Your energy is just right for preparing for big business. Discover how to make your life the best it can be with, your ultimate destiny, with your premium Karma Report.
