Latest news with #insecurities
The Guardian
a day ago
- General
- The Guardian
My girlfriend told me she prefers big penises. Now I'm worried I won't satisfy her
I have been seeing a woman whom I met online for almost a year. Before we met face to face, we had a number of phone calls, during which she became very sexual very quickly. She asked me the size of my penis (which is slightly above average). Then she told me she liked big penises and that an ex-partner's was 12in (30cm) long. This made me feel very insecure and I told her this. She said: 'It's only a preference.' Since then, this issue has surfaced again and again. I know it's hard to believe, but we haven't had penetrative sex yet. (Initially, I wanted to take things slow. Plus, she is menopausal and hasn't been feeling sexual much of the time.) We do have other kinds of sex and she says I am the 'best' in this respect. But penetrative sex, for me, is very important. She says I'm 'big enough' and that she is sure I'll satisfy her – but the thought that she 'prefers bigger' is devastating. She says she doesn't understand why she made the original remark. She is sorry, but this doesn't help. I feel I should walk away, but I have strong feelings for her. It is very likely that this woman was telling the truth when she said she doesn't know why she made the initial remark, but it probably came from her own insecurity. Trying to connect with someone new online or by phone can create a lot of anxiety, so some people present themselves as something they are not. When any woman talks about 'preferring big penises', it's usually – consciously or not – an attempt to gain power due to a sense of weakness, so it would be wise for you to try to ignore it. Her words have had the effect of pushing you away but try having a gentle and frank conversation. Hopefully, both of you will get to the point of recognising the other's insecurities and resolve to work on mutual soothing and acceptance. Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders. If you would like advice from Pamela on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns to (please don't send attachments). Each week, Pamela chooses one problem to answer, which will be published online. She regrets that she cannot enter into personal correspondence. Submissions are subject to our terms and conditions.
The Guardian
a day ago
- General
- The Guardian
My girlfriend told me she prefers big penises. Now I'm worried I won't satisfy her
I have been seeing a woman whom I met online for almost a year. Before we met face to face, we had a number of phone calls, during which she became very sexual very quickly. She asked me the size of my penis (which is slightly above average). Then she told me she liked big penises and that an ex-partner's was 12in (30cm) long. This made me feel very insecure and I told her this. She said: 'It's only a preference.' Since then, this issue has surfaced again and again. I know it's hard to believe, but we haven't had penetrative sex yet. (Initially, I wanted to take things slow. Plus, she is menopausal and hasn't been feeling sexual much of the time.) We do have other kinds of sex and she says I am the 'best' in this respect. But penetrative sex, for me, is very important. She says I'm 'big enough' and that she is sure I'll satisfy her – but the thought that she 'prefers bigger' is devastating. She says she doesn't understand why she made the original remark. She is sorry, but this doesn't help. I feel I should walk away, but I have strong feelings for her. It is very likely that this woman was telling the truth when she said she doesn't know why she made the initial remark, but it probably came from her own insecurity. Trying to connect with someone new online or by phone can create a lot of anxiety, so some people present themselves as something they are not. When any woman talks about 'preferring big penises', it's usually – consciously or not – an attempt to gain power due to a sense of weakness, so it would be wise for you to try to ignore it. Her words have had the effect of pushing you away but try having a gentle and frank conversation. Hopefully, both of you will get to the point of recognising the other's insecurities and resolve to work on mutual soothing and acceptance. Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders. If you would like advice from Pamela on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns to (please don't send attachments). Each week, Pamela chooses one problem to answer, which will be published online. She regrets that she cannot enter into personal correspondence. Submissions are subject to our terms and conditions.
The Sun
14-05-2025
- Entertainment
- The Sun
Katie Price's ex Kris Boyson ‘furious' over cheating claims after her bombshell interview
KATIE Price's ex-fiance Kris Boyson is "furious" after she once again claimed that every man she's been with has cheated on her. Although Katie, 46, didn't name names in her latest interview, Kris, 36, is fed up with being caught in the fallout of her broad-brush relationship claims. It's believed the personal trainer, who dated Katie from 2018 to 2019 and was briefly engaged to her, wants to distance himself from the narrative she continues to promote. A source told The Sun: "Kris is furious that Katie talked about how all men have cheated on her on the Paul C. Brunson podcast, as he never did and he's sick of her saying it. "She's said it during a few interviews now, and he feels like it's dragging his name through the mud and tarnishing him with the same brush as some of the other blokes she's dated, when he has moved on. "They dated years ago, but Kris feels like she talks about all her exes as if they are the same and like she is completely blameless for anything ever going wrong in a relationship.' The latest instance came during Katie's appearance on We Need To Talk, where she opened up about her insecurities and the emotional damage of past romances. She told Celebs Go Dating expert Paul: 'I suppose every, literally, every relationship I've been in, I've been cheated on. 'And when I see the people they cheated on me with, I've always gone, 'Oh, why have they gone for them? I thought I was a little bit better looking than them' "It sort of gives you that self doubt, 'What am I good enough for?'' She also spoke about patterns of jealousy, gaslighting, and toxic dynamics, saying: 'That's all I've ever been used to... there was domestic abuse, gaslighting.' Also in the interview, Katie detailed the harrowing abuse she suffered at the hands of a jailbird boyfriend in her teens. The Page 3 legend opened up about her first boyfriend, who was 10 years her senior when they began dating, shortly after his release from prison. Katie said her ex was "always p***ed" and recalled losing her her virginity to him on her 16th birthday after they attended an East 17 concert. Katie's mum Amy did her best to prevent the relationship, but her daughter didn't understand her reasoning at the time. She explained: "I argued with mum, 'when I'm going out, he's picking me up' and now I look back, thinking my mum was stopping me, she wasn't, she was protecting me. 'The amount of times my mum had to pick me up, where he'd cut all my clothes off and I was naked in a telephone box, [calling her mum] 'Mum, he's done it again. Pick me up'." Despite Amy's best efforts to intervene, it took a long time before Katie could free herself of her abuser. 'Then my mum called Child Protection and the police," said Katie. Then I was training to be a nurse, because that's what I wanted to do, be a registered nurse. "But before I did the course, I worked in these nursing homes. I was like 16, and they had to call the police on him. These are memories that I've got, a big police van, him kicking off because he thought I fancied a guy that worked there. 'It took ages to get out of that relationship. It was dreadful. But I was so sucked into like, yeah, he's older with the car. And it was near the end of my school years.' Katie is currently in a relationship with Married At First Sight 's JJ Slater. Domestic abuse - how to get help DOMESTIC abuse can affect anyone - including men - and does not always involve physical violence. Here are some signs that you could be in an abusive relationship: Emotional abuse - Including being belittled, blamed for the abuse - gaslighting - being isolated from family and friends, having no control over your finances, what you where and who you speak to Threats and intimidation - Some partners might threaten to kill or hurt you, destroy your belongings, stalk or harass you Physical abuse - This can range from slapping or hitting to being shoved over, choked or bitten. Sexual abuse - Being touched in a way you do not want to be touched, hurt during sex, pressured into sex or forced to have sex when you do not consent. If any of the above apply to you or a friend, you can call these numbers: The Freephone National Domestic Abuse Helpline, run by Refuge on 0808 2000 247 for free at any time, day or night Men who are being abused can call Respect Men's Advice Line on 0808 8010 327 or ManKind on 0182 3334 244 Those who identify as LGBT+ can ring Galop on 0800 999 5428 If you are in immediate danger or fear for your life, always ring 999 Remember, you are not alone. 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men will experience domestic abuse over the course of their lifetime. Every 30 seconds the police receive a call for help relating to domestic abuse. 4 4
