Latest news with #monogamish
Yahoo
25-07-2025
- General
- Yahoo
Monogamy vs. monogamish? 7% of Americans are in monogamish relationships
Monogamy vs. monogamish? 7% of Americans are in monogamish relationships Summer is heating up, and love—or at least lust—is in the air. However, love is no longer the 'until death do us part' variety, according to a recent Hims survey. A majority of men (64%) and women (57%) in America say monogamy is outdated, unrealistic, or downright impossible. Others say they just want to keep their options open. When asked about their feelings towards monogamy, America tipped non-monogamous, with 39% of respondents saying monogamy is the only type of relationship they'd consider, and the other 61% saying otherwise. Specifically, 9% say it's aspirational but not realistic; 9% say it's old fashioned and outdated; 7% say they don't believe it's possible; and 6% saying it's possible for women but not men (hmm). Another 7% say they are keeping their options open, and 11% say it just depends—the more sexual options people have, the less monogamous they are likely to be (see Monogamy By the Numbers). 12% say the jury's out—they just aren't sure what they think about monogamy one way or the other. Q: Which describes your feelings toward monogamy? 39% It's the only type of relationship I'd consider 11% It depends on how many sexual options a person has—the more options people have, the less monogamous they are likely to be 9% It's aspirational but unrealistic 9% It's old-fashioned and outdated 7% I don't believe people can be monogamous 7% I just don't want to be in a monogamous relationship 6% It's possible for women but not for men 12% I'm not sure America is Open to Open Relationships Backing up the finding that monogamy is falling out of favor, or at least not as expected as it used to be, America was split on whether they preferred marriage or something other than tying the knot. 54% of respondents said old-fashioned courtship and marriage was their preferred path, with a close 46% saying they are looking for something else. Furthermore, 7% of respondents are currently in an open relationship, including 15% of Gen Z respondents (see below), about the same percentage of respondents who report not being married, but in a monogamous relationship (8%). Sexual experimentation also tied with sexual comfort as America's preferred way to express their romantic relationships (49% vs. 51%, respectively) and one-third of respondents (32%) value 'a little mystery' over a serious commitment, with women and men being about equally as likely to want some wiggle room in their relationship (29% of women want to keep things open vs. 34% of men). Gen Z is the least monogamous generation to date—but they're still looking for love, IRL As a generation that has consistently bucked the trends, it's not surprising that Gen Z is the least likely to say monogamy is their preferred relationship style. 68% of Gen Zs, including 65% of Gen Z women and 71% of Gen Z men, say they'd consider non-monogamous relationships. This compares to 64% of Millennials, 50% of Gen Xers, and 43% of Baby Boomers, showing a clear trend between monogamy and generation. Also, it is unsurprising that only 44% of Gen Zs are looking for old-fashioned romance compared to 54% of total respondents. Gen Zs are also 2X more likely to be in an open relationship than respondents overall (15% vs. 7%), and 5X more likely than their Gen X parents to be in an open relationship (15% vs. 3%). However, as noted in Gen Z is Finding Love the Old Fashioned Way, next-generation relationships don't necessarily mean virtual ones. 74% of Gen Zs and 77% of respondents prefer IRL relationships to digital courtship. In other words, Gen Zs don't want to digitize their romantic partnerships; they just want to diversify them. What else do Gen Zs want in a romantic partner? Ambition. Gen Zs were more likely than other generations to say they prefer ambition to romance, with 38% of Gen Zs picking a partner who is ambitious to one who is romantic, compared to 36.5% of Millennials, 32% of Gen Xers, and 27% of Baby Boomers who feel the same way. In bed, women call the shots as much as men In another departure from tradition, women report calling the shots in bed as much as their male partners. 50% of women and an equal 50% of men say, when it comes to who takes the lead in bed, 'it's a 50/50 split.' And what do women want from their partners? Experimentation. Women were nearly as likely as men to say they want sexual experimentation over sexual comfort (48% of women want experimentation vs. 50% of men). Gen Z women were more likely than their Gen Z male counterparts to want to experiment: 55% of Gen Z women want sexual experimentation over sexual comfort compared to 52% of Gen Z men. This study is based on a 7,100-person online survey, which included (1) 5,000 18-to-65-year-old respondents in the top 50 metropolitan areas (100 respondents per city); (2) 5,000 18-65-year-old respondents in each of the 50 states (100 respondents per state); and (3) a nationally representative sample of 500 18-to-65-year-old respondents to contextualize results. These three categories are not mutually exclusive; some respondents fall within multiple categories. The study was fielded in January 2025. Findings were analyzed by 190 demographic and psychographic cuts, including city, region, gender (when Hims refer to 'women' and 'men,' it includes all people who self-identify as such), age, race and ethnicity, relationship status, parenting status, sexual orientation (heterosexual, bisexual, gay, lesbian, pansexual, asexual, queer, etc.), fandoms (music, sports, etc.), and fitness and diet preferences, among other areas of interest. All data in this study are from this source, unless otherwise noted. Independent research firm, Culture Co-op, conducted and analyzed research and findings. This story was produced by Hims and reviewed and distributed by Stacker. Solve the daily Crossword
The Guardian
01-06-2025
- Health
- The Guardian
This is how we do it: ‘In my 50s I want to be 'monogam-ish' – to have to have my cake and eat it'
There was some sexual frustration in our early years together, and that led us to discover that we were both ethically non-monogamous Ever since I was young, I've looked up to strong men. I remember being really interested in my gym teacher when I was at school. So when I saw Gavin's profile on a dating site, I instantly liked the stats. He's athletic, pays attention to self-care, and right from the get go we found lots to talk about. It was an easy match. We're both into kissing and we love passionate embraces, but at the beginning we weren't connecting very well physically. It took us time to really develop a strong chemistry in bed. And then one day it just clicked, and we've never looked back. There was some sexual frustration in our early years together, and that led us to discover that we were both ethically non-monogamous. It all started when I told him that one of his ex-partners made me a little bit horny. I was apprehensive to tell him because it's a sensitive topic. But Gavin was receptive. He said, 'Well, maybe one day we could explore bringing in other people.' It took time to build a relationship before we were willing to entertain going elsewhere, but it was a natural progression. It changed the dynamic for the better and brought us closer. We call it a 'monogam-ish' relationship. We got here by mutual trust and respect – the idea that we're sexual beings and our relationship shouldn't stop us from exercising those tendencies from time to time. Gavin's retired so he has opportunities to meet people online and host them during the day, which I can't because I'm working. That's happened a couple of times and I've felt a little bit uneasy about it – I was worried about his safety more than anything. But on the flip side, he's mentioned that the pool starts to shrink the older you get. So if there's an opportunity, he believes it's fleeting and has to take it. Though being engaged sexually with Gavin is paramount to me, we're not daily sex people – we do it about once a week. Most evenings we tidy up in the kitchen, go to bed and live like an old married couple. Sign up to Inside Saturday The only way to get a look behind the scenes of the Saturday magazine. Sign up to get the inside story from our top writers as well as all the must-read articles and columns, delivered to your inbox every weekend. after newsletter promotion If you're keen to talk to us about your sex lives you can get in touch by filling in the form below. It is very important that both sexual partners are happy to participate. Jimmy was very much in favour of trying to meet a third person, with the understanding that if one of us was uncomfortable, that would be the end of it Despite our age difference, we're both very sexually active – it's continued to thrive and grow through our 11 years together. I was more conscious of the generational difference than Jimmy, and we took it very slowly, not wanting to rush into anything. Jimmy had always dated older guys, but this was new territory for me. We have a very open attitude to sex, and in about our third year we set up a joint dating profile and began introducing other people into our experience. It was my idea, but Jimmy was very much in favour of trying to meet a third person, with the understanding that if one of us was uncomfortable, that would be the end of it. It took a lot of conversations about what the expectations were and it was a new experience for both of us. When you hit your 50s, you realise what you really want out of life. For me that was to be happy, to have freedom, to have a loving partner but to not feel restricted. To have my cake and eat it. As I'm older than Jimmy, I'm not quite as interested in sex. I don't feel any guilt about that, because if he wanted to have sex with someone else, he could do that. It brings us closer together as we find it exciting to hear about each other's fun times outside our relationship. Obviously there are people who Jimmy finds attractive and I don't, and vice versa. He is a very attractive young man and when we're out you can see people flirt with him. It's fun to watch and makes me appreciate him and all he has to offer. We have an active sex life together but I think having sex with outsiders is a realistic expectation of a 20-year age gap. When a person gets older they don't give up on sex, but a younger person definitely has a higher drive, so to have this freedom keeps it interesting for both of us. It keeps things sexy.
