Latest news with #puberty
Washington Post
17 hours ago
- General
- Washington Post
My 11-year-old daughter doesn't wash her hair or brush her teeth effectively
Dear Meghan: Our 11-year-old daughter is not motivated by personal hygiene. She will shower when reminded to, but she does not wash her hair effectively (I still have to wash it for her sometimes to make sure it gets clean). She is in puberty and is starting to get pimples on her face, but she will not wash her face at night unless I basically walk her into the bathroom and do it with her. When she brushes her teeth in the morning, she still has morning breath afterward, so clearly is not doing an effective job. I am at a loss. We have worked with her and, frankly, nagged her for years, and I'm just tired of it. Is this developmentally appropriate? We do not believe she is neurodivergent, and she's a great kid — smart, social and involved in a lot of activities. I don't understand this refusal to do the basics of effective personal hygiene. The approach we've been taking is clearly not working, so I would love some advice. Thank you! — Nagging Not Working Nagging Not Working: Personal hygiene is a sticky issue in these in-between years. Your daughter is no longer a young girl, but she's not quite a teen yet. Hormones, changes in her body and social pressures all take center stage at this age, and three things come to mind when I read this letter. First, parents need to understand the development stage of their child. Second, I am not sure that neurodivergence is off the table. And third, you need to find a new style of communication with her, stat. Developmentally, your daughter is experiencing puberty in her body, but her mind may still be immature. In her book, 'The Crucial Years,' psychologist Sheryl Gonzalez Ziegler says: 'Children in the earlier years of middle school aren't equipped for puberty. Their bodies may be maturing faster, but their brains are not. … This means that kids under the age of twelve aren't ready to understand or process many of the feelings and situations their changing bodies might lead to.' Essentially I am wondering, despite the nagging and helping, does your daughter actually understand what is happening in her body? She needs guidance and support, beginning with flipping through a book (choose one that matches your family's values) with her, detailing what puberty is and isn't. This isn't a moment of shame, 'See, this is why you have more zits and your hair is oily!' Rather, it's a moment to say: 'Hey, everyone goes through this, and here are some ideas for how to take care of your body. Let's figure it out so it works for you.' I know that there is much talk about the autism spectrum these days, but it is worth mentioning that girls go un- and underdiagnosed, often well into adulthood, because of how well they mask (which is the term used for coping to look 'neurotypical' in social settings and even with family). It isn't that people with autism don't 'care' about hygiene, it's that their sensory system is sometimes overwhelmed, clouding how well a task has been completed or even completed at all. Some people hate the feeling of sudsy hair, or the toothpaste is too minty. And some people simply get stuck in their own minds and don't attend to needs right in front of them — which is maddening until you understand that this is not a willpower issue. Finally, I don't know whether your standards of cleanliness are, in fact, appropriate for your daughter. Check with your pediatrician to see whether your expectations are in line with typical hygiene behavior in an 11-year-old. If your expectations are reasonable, use the Ross Greene Collaborative and Proactive Solutions problem-solving method to find solutions that work for both parties (there are books, a website and trained facilitators). Hygiene is important, but your daughter's voice must be centered here, and the Greene model allows for both parent and child to voice their point of view. When the parent is controlling a child's body as much as you are, this problem-solving model may feel slow and frustrating at first, but there's a bigger goal: We want our children to find reliance on and independence with their own bodies. You may have a vision of cleaner hair and fresh breath (understandably), but let's instead focus on helping your daughter grow skills to care for her own body. There are numerous resources available in the Greene approach, and don't be afraid to hire someone trained in the framework to help you. In the meantime, immediately find and praise what your daughter is doing well. She may feel quite ashamed by your fussing over her body, so establish a deeper connection by creating situations where your daughter shines (especially when it comes to self-care). Whether it is her outfit or hair style, find what is working and truly see her, while ignoring the bad breath and skin (for now). Get the support you need, start with her doctor and stay loving. Good luck.
The Guardian
4 days ago
- General
- The Guardian
The kindness of strangers: when my period arrived, a lifeguard quietly put a towel around me
It wasn't my first period, but it was within the first year of getting my period. I was only 13 years old and, when you first start menstruating, you never know when your next period is going to arrive. I was away on holiday with my family, playing in the hotel pool with some new friends I'd just met. There was definitely a boy there I fancied. At one point, I hopped out of the pool and suddenly this lifeguard, who must have only been 15 or 16 himself, walked straight up, put a towel around me and said really quietly in my ear, 'You need to go to the bathroom.' I looked down and realised why: my period had started. That was it. He said nothing more. Not even my twin sister, who was also in the pool, had any idea what had happened. He was that subtle about it. If he hadn't done that, it likely would have destroyed my entire holiday. You can just imagine the humiliation of having met a group of cool teenagers you're trying to impress and suddenly you've got blood running down your legs. This was the 1980s – they would have pointed at me and laughed! I will always be grateful to that lifeguard. I've always wished that I could go online and find this boy to thank him – or thank his mother more than anything, as she clearly taught him perfect manners. He somehow knew not to make a big deal of it, and how not to embarrass me. It was just done so beautifully. I now have two sons myself and I've always said to them, if you ever see a stain on a girl's dress, take off your jumper, put it around her waist, tell her she needs to go to the bathroom and never mention it again. That day also showed me that kindness doesn't have to be big, sweeping 'look at me' gestures – the smallest acts can be the most impactful. From making your day to changing your life, we want to hear about chance encounters that have stuck with you. Your contact details are helpful so we can contact you for more information. They will only be seen by the Guardian. Your contact details are helpful so we can contact you for more information. They will only be seen by the Guardian. If you're having trouble using the form click here. Read terms of service here and privacy policy here
Washington Post
18-05-2025
- Health
- Washington Post
Healthy diet in childhood linked to later first menstrual period
Eating an unhealthy diet is tied to an earlier first period, a new analysis suggests. The study linked a girl's first menstrual period — a milestone known as menarche — to what she ate, showing ties between potentially inflammatory diets rich in processed and refined foods, red meat and beverages such as soda and an earlier onset of menstruation.
Daily Mail
13-05-2025
- Health
- Daily Mail
I have small genitals, no sex drive and can't smell... meet the men who didn't go through puberty because of this little-known syndrome that affects thousands
While other boys his age were dealing with acne and mood swings, as a teenager, Neil Smith experienced none of this. For Neil, now 55 and a biomedical scientist from Rickmansworth in Hertfordshire, never went through puberty. He has Kallmann syndrome – a condition where puberty is delayed or absent, due to a problem with the release of sex hormones. Those affected have small genitals and no sex drive; they also have a reduced or total loss of smell.
Daily Mail
07-05-2025
- Health
- Daily Mail
Scientists discover trigger for 'alarming' rise in girls hitting puberty as young as nine - putting them at increased cancer risk
Girls who eat an unhealthy diet are more likely to start their periods worryingly early, putting them at increased risk of breast cancer in later life, a new study has suggested. Researchers found that pre-teens who consume plenty of vegetables, wholegrains and lean meat were far more likely to hit puberty above the average age of 13, compared to those on a diet high in processed foods and salty snacks. The results were independent of body mass index, suggesting that healthy diets are crucial regardless of wh a child is overweight. The results were independent of body mass index, suggesting that healthy diets are crucial regardless of whether or not a child is overweight. Previous studies have shown that starting puberty at a very young age can increase a woman's cancer risk in later life. This is thought to be due to prolonged exposure to reproductive hormones like oestrogen, which stimulates breast tissue, raising the risk of the disease. A 2012 analysis, involving data from more than 100 studies, found that for every year younger a girl started her period, her risk of developing breast cancer increases by five per cent. The researchers found that girls who started their period at around 10 years-old had a 25 per cent increased risk of breast cancer in later life, compared to girls who started their period aged 15. Other studies found that girls who have their first period before the age of 11 have a 15-20 per cent increased risk of breast cancer. It comes as studies suggest that the average age that puberty begins is on the decline in girls. A study published last year found that girls born between 2000 and 2005 started their period at around 11, compared to 12 in the 60s and 70s. The Harvard University researchers found that the proportion of girls starting their periods before the age of 11 had increased from 8.6 per cent to 15.5 per cent between 1950 and 2023. Meanwhile, the proportion of girls who started their periods before the age of nine had more than doubled during that same time frame. Professor Holly Harris, who led the current study, is now underscoring the need for young children and adolescents to have access to healthy, nutrient-dense meals. The first of its kind study, published in the journal Human Reproduction, investigated the link between diet and the age girls started their period. The researchers studied 7,530 girls, aged between 9 to 14, from the Growing Up Today Study (GUTS) in the US in two waves, from 19996 to 2001 and 2004 to 2008 respectively. Upon joining the study girls completed a questionnaire about their diet, updating the researchers every one to three years. They also reported their age when their period first started, in years and months. The researchers assessed the girls' diets against two established eating patterns, known as the alternative healthy eating index (AHEI) and the empirical dietary inflammatory pattern (EDIP). The healthy index diet awards more points for healthier foods, such as vegetables, legumes and wholegrains, while typically unhealthy foods including red and processed meats and salt score lower. Foods that are more likely to cause inflammation in the body—such as processed meats, sugary drinks and refined carbohydrates like pasta and white breads—are reflected by the EDIP. Over the course of the study, 93 per cent of girls had their first period at around 13-years-old. Researchers found that the girls with the healthiest diets were 8 per cent less likely to have their first period within the first month of the study, compared to those who had unhealthy eating habits. They also found that those with the most processed meat and refined carbohydrates in their diets were 15 per cent more likely to have their first period in this time. These girls also reported completing less hours of exercise in comparison to the girls with the healthiest diets. Prof Harris said: 'We observed that these two dietary patterns were associated with age of menarche (the first menstrual cycle), indicating that a healthier diet was linked to menstrual periods starting at an older age. 'Generally eating fruits, vegetables, whole grains, fatty fish, nuts and legumes, while limiting intake of red and processed meats, refined grains, sugar-sweetened beverages and added salt, benefits everyone regardless of age', she added. Menstruation usually starts around age 12, but experts such as Dr Natalie Shaw, a neuroendocrinologist at the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences (NIEHS), have found that girls have increasingly been tending towards a younger onset. In some cases in the US, girls as young as six have started menstruating before noticing any other signs of puberty. Experts have put this down to the ongoing obesity crisis, with fat cells containing hormonal properties triggering puberty at a younger age. One of the most devastating consequences of starting puberty early is the increased risk of developing breast or uterine cancer later in life. While it had been speculated on in previous years, ground breaking research in 2020 established the association between early puberty and breast cancer. Dr Dale Sanders, chief epidemiologist at the National Institute of Environmental Health explained: 'Girls experience hormonal changes during puberty, along with changes to the breast tissue itself, that we think could affect breast cancer risk.' 'The breast is thought to be more vulnerable to carcinogens during periods of rapid development, like during puberty', she added. Dr Frank Biro, who led the 2020 research, agreed that early puberty can increase breast cancer risk. Early menstruation is triggered by a hormone called insulin-like growth factor 1 (IGF 1). Girls who have higher levels of this hormone at a young are more likely to go through puberty younger, and maintain high levels of IGF 1 throughout their life. This hormone is liked to higher levels of oestrogen, which regulates the female reproductive system. Women who have higher oestrogen levels typically have larger breasts and a thicker uterus lining than others. This in turn increases the risk of developing cancer. 'When a cell is driven to grow, then you increase your risk of having a bad copy made of the cell that is growing', Dr Biro explained.
