Signs You're Getting Older That No One Warned You About
"When doing nothing became my favorite thing to do on the weekend."
"At 44 I don't feel old, but when I'm going to do something nowadays, I think about if I could get hurt."
"When I started mixing corn flakes with frosted flakes because frosted flakes alone was too fucking sweet. Seven-year-old me would be shocked at old me."
"Making 'uuuof' noises when sitting down or getting up from the sofa."
"When celebrities would come on late night shows and they looked SO much older…then I would think 'I guess I do, too…'"
"Spent my 30th birthday itching to go home and take my new cordless vacuum cleaner for a spin."
"Whenever I have to enter my birthdate in a drop-down menu."
"I recently saw a Reddit post about things that were popular 27 years ago, and I thought about the '80s until I saw a comment that pointed out that we are talking about the '90s. I also then realized that I am older than 25. I also recently used the phrase '20 years ago' when I was talking to a friend. That hit different."
"The first time the barber asked if I wanted my eyebrows trimmed."
"The guy at the liquor store looked really quickly at my license. I said, 'That was fast.' He said it starts with 19..."
"When I realized everything seems to be an act of letting go."
"When I gave dating sites a try and found that the people my age were old-looking."
"I used to sneak out of my home to go to a party, now I sneak out of the party to go home."
"My 'Check Knee' light turned on."
"When the supermarket started playing the music I listened to in high school."
"When I went out to the bar, and thought that some of the people there looked like children to me. They were probably 25…"
"When all of my fellow welding apprentices at work started calling me their 'shop mom.'"
"When I started taking naps before noon. 😴"
"You know what's a totally not fun game to play with your younger coworkers? Asking them what cartoons they grew up watching."
"Nirvana being considered Classic Rock."
"Look at an intact cardboard box you have in your house. What do you think? If the answer is: 'Oh, this is a good cardboard box, I should hold on to it,' you know it has started."
"When Grandpa Simpson's eternal words ring truer and truer: 'I used to be with 'it,' but then they changed what 'it' was. Now what I'm with isn't 'it' anymore, and what's 'it' seems weird and scary.' It'll happen to you!"
"The setting in Back to the Future was the same distance from the 1950s as we are to the 1990s."
"Two words: gray pubes."
"My job has an iPad that we use for certain things. I asked a younger coworker how to adjust the volume, and he said, 'Oh, it's just an iPad. Wait, do you not know how to use an iPad?' He was genuinely surprised that I'd never used one before. I'm a millennial. My mom used to say I was tech-savvy with my flip phone. Now look at me, pathetic."
"When Gen Z started calling me aunty."
"When I tripped during a work outing and none of my coworkers laughed, but instead gasped and all ran to my side to make sure I was OK."
"When I realized I have scars older than some of my coworkers."
And finally: "My partner will occasionally take a picture of me when I 'look just like my mom' and send it to me because he thinks it's cute and it mortifies me. Eyeglasses propped on top of my head, peering at my phone, wearing a soft cardigan. Goddammit."
What about you?! Are you old, and what was your moment of realization, if so?
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