Jeremy Clarkson renames his trans pig – and makes hilarious new decision on its future
TELLY farm favourite Jeremy Clarkson has made the rasher decision not to send his tiny transgender pig to the slaughterhouse.
While most of the Sun columnist's swine are dispatched to be turned into bacon, sausages and pork chops, he has decided to save diminutive Richard Ham — named after his ex-Top Gear and Grand Tour co-host Richard Hammond.
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Jeremy Clarkson has made the decision not to send his tiny transgender pig to the slaughterhouse
Credit: Getty
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Jeremy has decided to name the diminutive pig Richard Ham
Credit: Amazon
But in scenes from the latest episode of Clarkson's Farm — streaming tomorrow — viewers discover the pint-sized pig is not being kept purely out of affection.
Instead, he is spared the butcher's knife in a bid to get the next lot of female pigs 'in the mood' — and is likened to late Playboy boss
Jeremy says: 'The problem is, if he goes on the lorry, he's killed and all we get in return is chipolata and a pork chop the size of a walnut.
'If he stays here, we've got to feed him for no reason.
READ MORE ON JEREMY CLARKSON
'And that's not farming.
'But the next lot of sows, we're going to use artificial insemination on them, to make them pregnant.
'But we can't do that until they get in heat and they won't get in heat unless there's man pig nearby.
'So why don't we keep him as the farm's man
Most read in News TV
'Good old Richard Ham — you could be
Last week, viewers saw farm manager
I don't want folk going veggie due to farming crisis, rages Jeremy Clarkson - so my pub will serve pig uterus & squirrel
Then Kaleb informed him Richard Ham was showing signs he might be trans after being bonked by another boar.
But Kaleb is still bewildered by Jeremy's decision to keep the little porker, saying: 'What is this farm coming to?'
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The Irish Sun
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The Irish Sun
2 hours ago
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AN F1 boss has revealed insider information on Michael Schumacher's inner circle - like who "regularly" visits him and his shock at one pal who won't. Schumacher hasn't been in the public eye since 7 Schumacher lifts the trophy after victory in the Formula One Monaco Grand Prix in Monte Carlo, Monaco Credit: Getty 7 German formula one world champion Michael Schumacher of Ferrari hugs his wife Corinna in 2004 Credit: Alamy 7 Ex-Red Bull chief Richard Hopkins has spoken out about the star Credit: Re-Engineering Australia Foundation 7 The F1 legend's family Now ex-Red Bull chief Richard Hopkins has spoken out about the star - and revealed who regularly him. He told "I believe Luca Badoer, who is a close family friend, visits him. read more f1 "If there is a third, I don't know who that would be." But Hopkins also spoke of a pal who won't visit Schumacher - He added: "Flavio is, as we know, a flamboyant character. I would have thought he would have probably been the first person who would have wanted to see Michael in whatever way that was. But you have to respect that decision. "That's down to the individual. Not necessarily shared by all. I know there are close friends that go and see Schumacher and that's their own choice and for their own reasons. Most read in Motorsport "But Flavio has obviously got his and it's very deep and personal how we remember people, and how we want to remember people. "I think we all have to respect that one." Michael Schumacher's Monaco Grand Prix-Winning Ferrari F2001 In 2020 Briatore's former wife Elisabetta Gregoraci claimed that: 'Michael doesn't speak, he communicates with his eyes.' Addressing this rumour, Hopkins said: "I'm not in that circle to know the absolute facts about Schumacher. Not many people are. Does he communicate through his eyes? Quite possibly. "There is rumour he does watch Grand Prixs. But this is just speculation and perhaps unfair for anyone to make assumptions and guesses. "Any remark I make will be unqualified as well in that sense, so it's difficult to be drawn on it." In April, Schumacher belonging to fellow F1 icon Sir Jackie Stewart with help from Corinna. The helmet will be auctioned to raise money for Stewart's charity Race Against Dementia . But Hopkins has described the signing as potentially being a "one-off". He said: "I suspect that [Jackie Stewart helmet signature] gesture was a one-off. There was a lot of media around that and maybe for the family too much media. 7 Michael Schumacher and Flavio Briatore Credit: Getty - Contributor 7 Alpine F1 Team Executive Advisor Flavio Briatore looks on in the paddock during qualifying Credit: Getty 7 Race winner Michael Schumacher celebrates on the podium in 1994 Credit: Alamy "They try to keep everything quiet and private, so I'd hazard a guess that it was a one-off. 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The best medical treatment that money could buy brought the sporting great, who is worth £468million, back to consciousness. There had been rumours that further treatment in Paris had allowed Schumacher to take some small steps, but that was later dismissed. What do we know about Schumacher since his accident? MICHAEL Schumacher's life changed forever on December 29, 2013, when a skiing accident left the seven-time F1 champion with a severe brain injury. Since then, his family has protected his privacy, with only a select few remaining in contact with the racing legend. December 29, 2013 - The skiing accident : Schumacher suffers a life-threatening head injury while skiing off-piste in Méribel, France. He falls and hits his head on a rock, causing severe brain trauma despite wearing a helmet. He is airlifted to a hospital in Grenoble, where he undergoes two emergency surgeries. Doctors place him in a medically induced coma to reduce swelling in his brain. January 2014 - Schumacher fights for his life : Schumacher remains in a coma. Doctors describe his condition as 'critical but stable'. His family, led by wife Corinna, remains at his bedside. The world's F1 community rallies behind him, with fans holding vigils outside the hospital. June 2014 - Schumacher brought out of his coma : After nearly six months, Schumacher is brought out of his coma. His family confirms he is no longer in a coma but gives no further health details. He is transferred from Grenoble to a rehabilitation facility in Lausanne, Switzerland. September 2014 - Back home: Schumacher is moved to his family home near Lake Geneva. Corinna announces he will continue his recovery at home, with a dedicated medical team. 2015–2018 - Mystery surrounding his health: Reports suggest Schumacher is receiving round-the-clock medical care at home, costing £50,000 per week. Jean Todt reveals he still visits Schumacher and that they watch F1 races together. May 2017 - German magazine sued by Schumacher's family: The magazine Bunte has to pay Michael Schumacher €50,000 (£42,000) in damages after claiming in 2015 that Schumacher would walk again. The Hamburg regional court determined that the statement was false and infringed upon Schumacher's right to privacy. September 2019 - Schumacher secretly transferred to Paris : French media reports that Schumacher is taken to Paris for stem cell therapy at the Georges-Pompidou Hospital. The procedure is led by renowned surgeon Dr. Philippe Menasché. Details of the treatment remain undisclosed. December 2019 - Manager issues rare statement : Schumacher's longtime manager Sabine Kehm says his condition will remain private. She dismisses speculation and false reports about his health. September 2021 - Netflix documentary 'Schumacher' released : A new Netflix documentary, Schumacher, provides rare insights into his life. Corinna speaks publicly about his condition for the first time, saying: 'Michael is here. Different, but he's here, and that gives us strength.' December 2023 - 10 years since the accident : Schumacher turns 55. The anniversary of his accident is marked by tributes from the F1 world. Jean Todt confirms he still sees Schumacher regularly and describes his visits as 'full of affection'. September 2024 - Daughter Gina's wedding : Gina Schumacher, 27, marries longtime boyfriend Iain Bethke at the family's £27million Majorca villa. Reports claim Schumacher attends the wedding, but close friend Johnny Herbert later calls it 'A1 fake news'. Guests are reportedly required to hand over their phones to prevent leaks. December 2024 - Schumacher to become a grandfather : Gina announces she is pregnant, three months after her wedding. She shares the news on Instagram, writing: 'Impatiently awaiting the arrival of our little girl.'
