Their Best Match Came With the Final Swipe

New York Times

21-02-2025

Illyse Brittany Singer and Ty Christian Duncan were both disillusioned with dating when they connected on Tinder in October 2022.
'I was on every single dating app and dating all the wrong people but seeking a true partnership,' Ms. Singer said.
'I was just about to give up on the dating scene for a while, but then I met Illyse,' Mr. Duncan said.
The two, who both lived in Brooklyn, matched on Tinder because they both worked in the arts and liked each other's profile pictures. Mr. Duncan works at Gagosian Gallery in Manhattan's Chelsea neighborhood, and Ms. Singer at Roxy Cinema, an independent film house in TriBeCa.
At the time, Mr. Duncan, 47, was renting an apartment in Prospect Park. Ms. Singer, 38, had lived in the same apartment in Williamsburg for 18 years, where the couple now reside.
After a flurry of text messages over three days, they met for coffee on Oct. 13 at Sullivan Street Bakery, near Gagosian Gallery. 'I thought Illyse was beautiful and seemed very determined,' Mr. Duncan said. They spoke about their shared love of art, music and film and their personal and professional goals.
'I lost track of time and was late for my next appointment,' Ms. Singer said. Later that day she invited Mr. Duncan to a screening of the 1983 war drama 'Merry Christmas, Mr. Lawrence' at the Roxy that evening.
They had their next date two days later, again at the Roxy. They caught a screening of the 1979 crime drama 'Hardcore.' 'It was a super busy weekend at the theater, and I was tied up working and couldn't give Ty my full attention,' Ms. Singer said. 'Regardless, he wasn't intimated. There was a spark, almost an electric feeling between us.'
Mr. Duncan, who grew up in the Atlanta area, is an art preparator for Gagosian Gallery, a role that entails installing, packing, and shipping art. Ms. Singer is from Miami and is the cinema director for Roxy Cinema. She has a bachelor's degree in art history from Hunter College.
A few days after seeing 'Hardcore,' they had dinner at the Mediterranean restaurant Lighthouse BK, in Williamsburg, where they talked for five hours nonstop. Eventually, Mr. Duncan walked Ms. Singer to her apartment building, and when he turned around to leave, she grabbed his arm and pulled him in for a kiss. 'The way I felt with Ty was unlike anything I had ever felt with anyone else,' she said.
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Several more dates followed. Then Mr. Duncan asked Ms. Singer if she would go away with him to the Catskills over Halloween weekend. While there, they hiked, enjoyed fireside dinners and talked about how they had both wanted to own a house in upstate New York. 'I was entranced, heads over heels in love by the end of the weekend,' Mr. Duncan said.
The getaway cemented their relationship, and they fell into a cadence of seeing each other several times weekly for dinners or movies at the Roxy. On weekends, they took trips to the Catskills and started discussing the possibility of buying a home together. 'We used to go to open houses, and then our search became more serious,' Ms. Singer said.
Ms. Singer said that she knew she wanted to marry Mr. Duncan in June 2023 when they went to Marco Island, Fla., to celebrate her birthday with her parents and siblings.
'Ty was so loving to my nephews and taught them how to fish,' Ms. Singer said. 'They idolized him, and my entire family loved him.'
Mr. Duncan moved into Ms. Singer's apartment in July 2023. That month, they also found what they describe as 'their ideal home,' a Victorian house in the Catskills with a large garden and mountain views. 'All of our dreams were getting realized together,' Mr. Duncan said.
The couple had extensively talked about their married future together and became officially engaged on Dec. 25, 2023.
They were in their Catskills home celebrating Christmas with Mr. Duncan's mother who was visiting from Atlanta. 'We had just opened presents, but Ty said there was one more and pointed to an ornament of a wrapped present box on the tree,' Ms. Singer said.
She opened it to find a diamond and emerald ring inside. 'He got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife,' Ms. Singer said. 'The three of us couldn't stop crying.'
The couple were wed on Feb. 10 before 60 guests at the French restaurant Pastis in Miami. Norman Rabinovich, a close friend of the couple's who was ordained by Universal Life Church for the occasion, officiated.
In a nod to Ms. Singer's love for movies, the musician Adam Green sang a rendition of Nicolas Cage's interpretation of 'Love Me Tender' from the 1990 film 'Wild at Heart' as she walked down the aisle. Later they sat down to a lunch that included fried artichokes, steak frites and passion fruit tarts.
The celebrations continued that evening with a smaller group in a suite at the Arlo Wynwood hotel. 'I've waited so long for this moment and this man,' Ms. Singer said. 'I couldn't have imagined anything more perfect.'