29 "Effed Around And Found Out" Stories That Range From Horrifying To Absolutely Hilarious

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02-03-2025

Recently, Reddit user iwanttheworldnow turned to the popular r/AskReddit page to ask people, "What's your 'fucked around and found out' story?" and the answers are very entertaining. Let's cut straight to the chase — here are 30 of the best!
1. "Walking down the sidewalk in NYC with my wife, I saw a banana peel on the ground and was like, 'Why do they always show people slipping on these? How slippery can they be?'"
"I then proceeded to put all my weight on it, and totally did the legs flying up in the air, landing on my butt thing like you see in cartoons. I looked up and my wife was rolling her eyes to the point that I think she was seriously wondering how she married me."
— u/Plug_5
2. "When I was 13, a friend and I hopped onto a slow-moving freight train for...kid reasons. Then we took a seven-hour ride through nowhere before it slowed down again."
Sergey Kucherov / Getty Images
"Mom was pissed about that phone call."
— u/Meet_the_Meat
"How far away from home did you end up?"
— u/phillymjs
"About a four-hour drive."
— u/Meet_the_Meat
3. "When I was in middle school my parents used to buy granola bars to have around as quick snacks for us kids. Well, one day they came home with a Costco-size box of Fiber One bars."
"I had no clue what fiber did; all I knew was those bars were tasty, and I had an insatiable appetite, so I went to town.
The next day at school, my stomach was absolutely killing me. I mean it felt like steel wool was ripping around my intestines. It was so bad I had to have the school nurse call my parents to pick me up."
"When my dad arrived he asked if I had eaten anything unusual, so I fessed up to mowing through Fiber One bars."
NBC / Via giphy.com
"Dad: Do you know what fiber does?
Me: No.
Dad: How many did you eat?
Me: ...Six.
Cue the absolutely maniacal laughter from my father. That was about 20 years ago, and I still haven't lived that one down."
— u/d-dinosaur
4. "When I was a welder, we had a lot of people who thought using any kind of PPE was feminine, from old guys to brand new 18-year-olds."
"One day a guy was using the squint method to do a vertical weld and managed to splash some of the molten metal into his eyes. He's blind now, and due to not using the PPE provided he wasn't able to get worker's compensation or sue the corporation."
— u/LordofDonuts
5. "When I was a bouncer, there was a small scuffle at the bar, and I went to go steaming in. My workmate told me to slow down. I didn't listen."
"Ended up fighting a guy who played for the Leicester Tigers (rugby) and he absolutely manhandled me like I was a small child! I found out."
— u/CalCalDZ
6. "I put my finger on a hot car cigarette lighter. I didn't think it was hot because it wasn't red, it was white. Btw, this was like 45 years ago."
7. "My neighbor was remodeling her attic into a game room. She had stacks of beautiful old furniture, including a Tiffany-esque lamp. She asked me if I wanted it but warned me it would probably need to be rewired because it was from 1910 or something."
"I got it home, cleaned it thoroughly, and plugged it in to admire the glass panels. Great, worked fine. Then I went to move it and touched the bottom while it was plugged in (the metal base was missing a part).
The resulting shock gave me a glimpse of the afterlife, and I sat there stunned for about 20 seconds checking if my heart was still beating. Yes, it did need to be rewired."
— u/EmmelineTx
8. "I got my finger stuck in a bottle trying to get more cream out. My finger quickly became swollen and purple, and I had to go to the ER."
— u/Sims2Enjoy
"I had the rubber part of an earbud come off in my ear because I pushed it in too far. Couldn't get it out after like an hour of trying with a pair of big tweezers I have. My girlfriend couldn't either.
So I sheepishly walked into the ER and told the person working the desk what I did. She sort of rolled her eyes and called a nurse or something over. He laughed and grabbed a small forceps and removed it immediately. I think they took pity on my stupidity because they didn't take down my info or charge me. An expensive stupid tax would have been somewhat justified."
— u/bg-j38
10. "Went bowling as a kid. Wanted to know why stepping across the foul line was such a big deal. That was how I learned bowling lanes were lubricated. And probably what a pulled groin felt like."
11. "At 18, I had a real grown-up job and decided to splurge a bit when I got my first check. I bought a party tray of two dozen chocolate chip cookies from the local Safeway (if you know, you know) and decided to eat some. 'Some' turned into 24."
Kieran Stone / Getty Images, NBC
"I shit my pants on the way to work, turned around and left, shit my pants again on the way home. Shit for two days straight.
I can't look at a chocolate chip cookie without feeling my butthole quiver."
— u/BagelwithQueefcheese
12. "I was hitting a rock with a hammer as a kid. Well, the rock eventually flew up right into my eyeball. Took my family an hour to convince me that my eye didn't pop."
— u/Meckles94
13. "My uncle gave me some M-80s. I thought it would be a good idea to light them up and put them in a large fire ant nest to get rid of the ants. Turns out, all it does is piss them off and make them airborne. I ended up getting a nice hot shower of fire ants. I don't recommend it."
Iwak Lumba / Getty Images/500px
14. "I took part in an orgy and got chlamydia. So yeah, quite literally fucked around and found out."
15. "I worked in a nightclub. Someone attacked the bouncer and was ejected with a bop on the head and a, 'Don't fuckin' come back.'"
� Nina Dietzel / Getty Images
"The guy came back; he grabbed a lady inappropriately. Two bouncers grabbed him and took him out the back door and beat the crap out of him and took his wallet. (they took it into the police station the next day.)"
— u/Desperate_Dingo_1998
16. "At work, I decided to jump over a rolled-up carpet that was blocking the aisle. Instead of carefully navigating over or around it, I decided to jump over it."
Jose A. Bernat Bacete / Getty Images
"My toe caught on the stretch wrap and I went knee-first onto the concrete at high speed. Split my knee to the bone and I was out of work for a month."
— u/SolarOrigami
17. "My father told me not to cut toward myself with a pocket knife. I said that I was fine. I got four stitches in my hand that day."
— u/yameyeonthissite
18. "I started bullying the only kid who was geekier and smaller than me in high school for one reason, and one reason only — to impress the one girl who lived next door to both of us. On day one, he kicked my ass in front of the girl."
— u/TA-SP
19. "I went to a haunted house with three people who my dad said not to go with in a neighborhood he said not to go to."
"They started a fight with four locals. Two of them and three of us required an ambulance. I drove home alone and hurt without having any fun at all."
— u/CryAffectionate7814
20.
"Went on a hike with my family as a kid. I found an old metal bar and was hitting random things with it. When we got back to the car, lo and behold I found an old WD-40 can. My old man was very specific about me not hitting it with the bar. Well, I did."
NBC / Via giphy.com
21. "I ate an entire ghost pepper on a dare. Spent the next hour crying in the bathroom with milk and yogurt. My taste buds filed for divorce that day."
— u/PureEstimate3836
22. "I wondered if the ice was thick enough to cross the river. It wasn't."
Boy_anupong / Getty Images
"I'll tell you, being on the wrong side of the ice can really motivate you to move fast.
Luckily, it was not a big river — I was able to get close to the bank and break back through there."
— Squigglepig52
23. "When I was 8, my parents wouldn't let me have a bike. I borrowed my friend's bike, fell off, and fractured my skull. 💀"
24. "I was 4. My brother had the flu and was getting so much attention. Attention I wanted."
Vera Livchak / Getty Images
"4-year-old me proceeds to run out in the middle of winter, all but(t) naked, screaming that I wanted the flu.
I got the flu.
I did NOT want the flu."
— u/Unhappy_Mountain9032
25. "I didn't do well in school. Was pushing 30 and have only worked dead-end minimum wage jobs."
— u/satisfiedschools
"I went back to school at night at 30. I'm 45 now and things are so much better because I didn't fuck it up the second time."
— u/cbftw
26. "The first week Pokemon Go came out, it was rumored that ghost Pokemon could only be found in cemeteries. 'The biggest one In LA should work,' I thought, so I drove myself there.
Photitos2016 / Getty Images
"As I was driving through, there were several funerals taking place, and I just thought about how morally wrong this was, and I shouldn't be doing it. But I pressed on…"
"I found a hillside to park with no one around, got out of the car, and started roaming around with my phone. About 20 seconds into looking, I heard some pound horns blowing and witnessed half the hillside explode, like giant explosions triggered one after another, 100 yards away."
Jason Armond / Los Angeles Times via Getty Images
"A giant wall of dirt and dust almost got me as I jumped back into my car. A few guys in construction outfits came up to me a minute later, asking how I got there. I pointed out the roadway, which they realized they hadn't blocked off. Nothing more was said, and I left.
Needless to say, fucked around looking for ghost Pokemon and almost became one."
— u/CantAffordzUsername
27. "I was roughly 14 years old, and this was before cell phones/smartphones. I was shooting a BB gun in the desert, plinking cans and bottles in triple-digit weather. About a mile away, there was always a line of old freight cars on a set of tracks."
Artur Debat / Getty Images
"I walked over and shot at them for a bit, and eventually climbed into one of the cars. The interior was shaped like a 'W' with the center crest only about half the height of the walls, and a dead coyote was chillin' at the bottom of one of the bays. I didn't realize I fucked up until after jumping in."
"There was no ladder inside the car. Just steep inclines and vertical metal. I spent the next two hours repeatedly trying to run up the incline and grab the ledge to no avail."
"Sweltering hot and exhausted, I kinda resigned myself to my fate, same as the coyote. I tried again after another hour or so, and FINALLY managed to frantically grab the ledge and climb out.
DO NOT FUCK WITH TRAINS."
28. "Got a cut on my finger working in a warehouse about a decade ago. One particular coworker made fun of me for cleaning it and putting a bandaid on. Not one hour later, he got almost exactly the same cut, but just kept working to 'show me how a man does it.'"
Lingqi Xie / Getty Images
"The next day I come into work with a fully healed finger. He comes in with a sore red finger. After a couple days of it getting worse, he eventually goes to see a doctor.
Turns out his finger got infected. He almost got part of his finger amputated, missed time at work, and had to (mostly) pay out of pocket for antibiotics. That is apparently the 'manly' way to deal with a small cut."
— u/nitrobskt
29. And finally: "I was a 7-year-old at a kid's party and we all walked down to the bodega on the corner for slushies. I finished mine, and while we were all hanging out at the pool, I noticed another girl's unattended slushie."
Chatchai Tuppavasu / Getty Images
"I was still thirsty and being a greedy little shit, so I put the straw to my lips for a sip.
I just didn't realize a bee was stuck upside down in the straw, stinger first. Stinger meets lip. Swollen for days.
Greatest story of karma I've ever encountered."
— u/Eveningwisteria1
"Almost the exact same thing happened to me! But it was a can of Coca-Cola I left unwatched for a few minutes..."
Nurphoto / NurPhoto via Getty Images, Bsip / Universal Images Group via Getty Images