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South Park Savages ICE and Kristi Noem, Sends Trump to Mar-a-Lago — Read Recap
Did you think South Park would take it easy on Donald Trump this week? Yeah, we didn't, either. In Wednesday's episode, Cartman is enraged when he sees Clyde start a debate podcast where he says terrible things about women and Jews. Hey, that's Cartman's thing! As Clyde explains to guidance counselor Mr. Mackey, 'I'm just trying to make my nut, man.' (DoorDash isn't free, you know.) But then P.C. Principal fires Mr. Mackey because the government is cutting back on 'unnecessary expenses,' and Mr. Mackey is left wondering: 'What about my nut?' More from TVLine The Chi's Yolanda Ross Breaks Down Her Heartbreaking Exit in the Season 7 Finale: 'We All Lost It' The Sandman's Finale Made Us Wish for a Death-Centric Spinoff: 'We Did Play With Those Ideas,' EP Says Dexter: Resurrection Recap: Dexter's Connection With Mia Takes a Shocking Turn Mackey goes to the bank to look at his finances, and it's grim: His nut is $8,000 a month. ('I had no idea my nut was that big.') He can't find a job as a counselor, so he has to work for ICE rounding up undocumented immigrants because they're the only ones hiring: 'We don't ask for experience!… We don't care if you've read a book!' Mackey goes to the recruitment center and is immediately hired, and they show him an orientation video starring Homeland Security head Kristi Noem, who shoots dogs dead when she's not locking up immigrants. (Oh, and she doesn't look great without makeup on.) While Cartman takes over Clyde's podcast and becomes a 'master debater,' sporting a Charlie Kirk haircut, Mackey is handed a machine gun and sent out on his first ICE raid… at a Dora the Explorer concert. He and the other ICE agents rush in and arrest dad and grandmas, even Dora herself. Noem is pleased — but her Botox falters, and her face melts like a hot candle. ICE's overreach leads to angry protests in Denver, where one protestor argues 'there are many Latinos in heaven.' So Noem sends her ICE agents to heaven to round up all the Hispanic angels: 'If it's brown, it goes down.' By now, though, her face falls completely off and scurries away. Mackey's making good money as an ICE agent, but as his income increases, so does his nut. Noem has good news, though: The President has invited Mackey to Mar-a-Lago to thank him personally. He's flown down to Trump's pleasure palace, where Trump emerges in a pristine white suit like Ricardo Montalban from Fantasy Island — while his VP J.D. Vance is reduced to playing the pint-sized Tattoo. Trump wants to promote Mackey to head of homeland security, he says. But what about Noem? 'Her face freaks me out,' Trump admits. Mackey gets cold feet, though, when Trump pulls him into a bedroom with Satan — yikes — and as he tries to escape, Mackey finds that Mar-a-Lago is just a house of horrors. Even fellow guest Clyde is disillusioned: 'Just wanted to make my nut, sir. Didn't really want all this.' Mackey understands, telling the kid: 'If you're doing something you don't really believe in just to make your nut, you're gonna find that you just get sadder, and your nut just gets bigger.' They decide to leave together, with the help of Superman's flying dog Krypto… well, until Noem takes out poor Krypto with a sniper rifle. But when her face crawls off and leaves the ICE agents scrambling to recover it, that gives Mackey and the immigrants enough time to escape. All's well that ends well, we guess. Got thoughts on this week's ? Drop 'em in a comment below. Best of TVLine Mrs. Maisel Flash-Forward List: All of Season 5's Futuristic Easter Eggs Yellowjackets Recap: The Morning After Yellowjackets Recap: The First Supper
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17 minutes ago
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Decisive Gustavo Henrique shines, check out his stats
Gustavo Henrique had a high-level performance and was one of the best on the field in the Corinthians' classification. Author of the second goal in the victory over Palmeiras, he also intensely stood out without the ball. He completed 33 of the 36 passes he attempted, in addition to three long passes in five attempts. In the air, he won six out of eight duels and was also the leader in interceptions in the game, with 17 in total. To complete, he did not suffer any dribbles, nor did he commit any fouls during the 90 minutes. Data from Sofascore. With a safe, efficient, and decisive performance, Gustavo Henrique was one of the big names in the derby. This article was translated into English by Artificial Intelligence. You can read the original version in 🇧🇷 here.
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17 minutes ago
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Kelly Clarkson Reveals Ex-Husband Is ‘Ill,' Cancels Residency After Source Hinted at ‘Serious' Struggles
Kelly Clarkson has put her Las Vegas residency on pause as her ex-husband, Brandon Blackstock, battles a private illness. The mother of two — who shares daughter River Rose, 11, and son Remington Alexander, 9, with Blackstock, 48 — took to Instagram on Wednesday, August 6, to announce the difficult decision. 'Unfortunately, I need to postpone the remainder of the August Studio Session dates in Las Vegas,' she wrote. 'While I normally keep my personal life private, this past year, my children's father has been ill and at this moment, I need to be fully present for them.' 'I am sincerely sorry to everyone who bought tickets to the shows and I so appreciate your grace, kindness and understanding,' she concluded. Concerned fans flooded the comments section with words of love and support for the 'Since U Been Gone' singer, 43, and her family. One user replied, 'Those kids need you more than we do! Go be the best momma! Best wishes to all involved,' and a second fan chimed in, 'We love you Kelly! Positive vibes up for you and your family.' This comes one month after Clarkson canceled the first two shows of her Studio Sessions residency in early July. 'The prep and rehearsals have taken a toll on my voice,' she said in a post shared to social media. 'I want the shows to be perfect for y'all and I need to protect myself from doing serious damage so I am taking this weekend and next week to rest up so that we can deliver what you all deserve.' On July 8, an insider told Page Six that, along with her concerns about damaging her vocal cords, the American Idol alum had also been facing 'serious hidden battles' that 'very few people' were 'privy' to. At the time, Clarkson's pals were worried that she was 'completely burning out and running on fumes,' between her residency, her talk show, her upcoming gig on The Voice and more, a source told Star. Country legend Dolly Parton has also been 'calling and checking' in on her and 'offering support' to the singer. 'She wants to get together and have a talk, just the two of them, without any interruptions,' a separate insider told Star. Clarkson and Blackstock said 'I Do' in 2013 and welcomed their two children together before calling it quits following seven years of marriage. The 'Because of You' artist filed for divorce in June 2020, but their messy separation wasn't finalized until March 2022. Solve the daily Crossword
