Man Says His Girlfriend Let Her Ex Move in with Them — and Doesn't Understand Why He Doesn't Want to Live There Anymore

Yahoo

24-05-2025

A man said that his girlfriend bought a home last year, and he moved in with her — but she then told him her ex would also be moving in to help co-parent the daughter they share
The man said that it soon became clear that his girlfriend's ex 'still had feelings' for her, and so he opted to move out to protect his 'mental and emotional well-being'
The man, who shared his story on Reddit, added his girlfriend is now 'upset' — but his fellow Redditors say he should end the relationship immediatelyA man said that his girlfriend let her ex move into the home they share, and she doesn't understand why he's not okay with it.
The man detailed his experience on the Reddit forum, 'Am I the A------,' a place where Reddit users can go to seek input and advice about interpersonal conflicts. In his post, the man explained that his girlfriend, whom he says has a 10-year-old daughter from a previous relationship, bought a house last year, and 'I moved in with her.'
The man added that while he is not on the deed or mortgage, he was 'happy to contribute to the household,' noting that up until recently he was contributing about $2,000 per month towards the $5,000 mortgage.
He says that 'things were going well' — until his girlfriend informed him that she 'was going to let her ex (her daughter's father) move in to help with co-parenting.'
'I wasn't excited about the idea, but I tried to be understanding since I know how important stability is for their daughter,' the original poster continued.
However, the OP said that he eventually started feeling like a 'third wheel' in the home.
'It became clear that her ex still had feelings for her. He was overly familiar and acted like he was still part of the relationship. It made me very uncomfortable,' he wrote.
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The Redditor said that he ultimately decided to move out 'for my own mental and emotional well-being,' but his girlfriend is now 'upset' that he is no longer living there or contributing to the mortgage.
'I've told her that I'm not comfortable living in the same house as her ex, and that I don't feel it's fair to keep financially supporting a property I don't have any ownership in, especially under these circumstances,' he explained.
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'I care about her and her daughter, but I also need to look after my own financial and emotional health,' the man wrote at the end of his post, adding, 'AITA [am I the a------]?'
The vast majority of commenters said that think the poster should completely move on from this relationship, with a number of them theorizing that the girlfriend may be using him.
'This woman is using both of you to pay her mortgage. She's playing games for financial gain,' one person replied.
'NTA [not the a------],' someone else said, adding, 'But you are a chump. Girlfriend has her ex move back in — that alone is enough to break up.'
'NTA. You're not on the mortgage, and you're not currently living there. Cut and dry,' another commenter wrote.
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