
Autopsy (of an Ex-Teen Heartthrob) by Avan Jogia
Avan Jogia grew up as a teen idol. He stumbled into the spotlight during the birth of the internet, the early days of Instagram and Twitter, before everyone online was a star. He spent his time in that spotlight writing, observing the cult of celebrity, the hilarity, the absurdity, and sometimes sinister side of being idolized before you've even had the chance to decide for yourself who you are.
Now, in his most revealing and honest work to date, he has assembled a book of poems as an act of self-dissection. Part boozy lovesick rage and part personal reflection on the nature of fame, Autopsy (of an Ex-Teen Heartthrob) is a sharp, tantalizing collection of poems examining Avan's relationship with ego, idolatry, love as an act of worship, rage as an act of prayer, and sadness as confession.
Through vivid imagery (and sometimes startling honesty) Avan cuts himself open and observes the false gods he has worshipped, the ways he has sinned, and exhumes a version of himself that looks like someone we all know: a person searching for the means to cure pain, mend the wounds of insecurity, and satiate cravings for love.

Try Our AI Features
Explore what Daily8 AI can do for you:
Comments
No comments yet...
Related Articles


Japan Forward
2 hours ago
- Japan Forward
Exclusive: Retired Star Satoko Miyahara Still Seeking Future Path
Satoko Miyahara took time from her busy tour schedule to discuss her illustrious career, current work, and thoughts about the future in an exclusive interview. Satoko Miyahara dazzles during her performance in one of the 2025 Rock Stars on Ice tour stops. (©TRI NGUYEN) SAN JOSE, California ― Three years removed from her competitive career, Satoko Miyahara is just entering the prime of her life and the possibilities going forward are limitless. The 27-year-old Miyahara recently completed a grueling month-long tour of Canada and the United States with "Rock Stars on Ice." This marked the fourth year that the four-time Japan champion has skated with the group, which included the likes of two-time world champion Ilia Malinin and fellow world titlist Alysa Liu. Miyahara took time out from the busy tour schedule for an exclusive interview with Ice Time, where she discussed her illustrious career, current work, and thoughts about the future. Ice Time asked the two-time world medalist how she came to be the only Japanese skater with the Stars on Ice troupe. "When I retired from competition, I really wanted to do shows overseas," Miyahara stated in a quiet room inside the SAP Center before a Sunday afternoon show. "I was skating as a guest skater in Stars on Ice Japan. That was the very first connection. My agent contacted the producer of SOI and asked if I could join the Canadian tour, and the answer was positive." Satoko Miyahara in a recent file photo. (SATOKO MIYAHARA/via INSTAGRAM) Renowned for her beautiful line and edge on the ice, I wondered whether she enjoyed competitions or show skating more. "I think I like shows better, but I really like the training process toward competitions," Miyahara commented. "So it's hard to decide which. Just talking about the actual performance, I like to perform in shows. "I think at competitions I pressure myself too much and I never thought that I did my best programs at competitions. But when it comes to shows, it is more about how you perform, and you can do the programs you really want to do." Satoko Miyahara (JACK GALLAGHER) Her successful career has brought her a legion of fans in various parts of the globe, and along the way she has earned several nicknames. Ice Time wanted to know which one was her favorite. "I adore them all," Miyahara remarked. " 'Satopi' is from (former training partner) Ayaka Hosoda and it's my oldest nickname. 'Satton' comes next because one of my friends who trained with me gave me that name. "It's so funny, to say our nicknames in Western Japan, it's a very Kansai nickname. The pronunciation is Sat-ton, but the people in Kanto cannot really pronounce it right. Even between skaters we always have fun talking about that." The final moniker is believed to have been originally bestowed upon her by foreign fans. " 'Tiny Queen' I love because my fans gave me that name and it always brings me the feeling that I should be honored about myself and be like a tiny queen. I tend to shrink and feel like I am not good enough. 'Tiny Queen' brings the feeling that I should be proud of myself and show my best." Satoko Miyahara Added Miyahara, "I don't know if it was foreign fans or Japanese fans who came up with the nickname, but everybody knows it means me." Satoko Miyahara competes in the women's short program at the 2018 Pyeongchang Olympics. (©SANKEI) When one has had as decorated a career as Miyahara has, I was interested in hearing her memories of the Pyeongchang Olympics, where she came in fourth in 2018. "I was very, very, very happy with both the team event (Japan finished fifth) and my individual event," Miyahara proclaimed. "Both were a great result. For me, the Olympics were the biggest goal, so I was so happy that I was able to get that opportunity to participate in the competition. The whole event felt like I was in a wonderland. That is my biggest memory." Ice Time was in Pyeongchang and vividly remembers Miyahara's outstanding performance, where she finished behind Russians Alina Zagitova and Evgenia Medvedeva, and Canada's Kaetlyn Osmond. From left, runner-up Satoko Miyahara, gold medalist Elizaveta Tuktamysheva and third-place finisher Elena Radionova in the women's singles competition at the 2015 World Figure Skating Championships in Shanghai. (DAVID W CARMICHAEL/CC BY-SA 3.0/via WIKIMEDIA COMMONS) Miyahara, a two-time Grand Prix Final medalist, considers the 2018 Games to have been the pinnacle of her career, but also cited a couple of other competitions as being high on her list of favorites. "The Pyeongchang Olympics was my highlight," Miyahara recalled. "Also, the very first worlds (2015), where I got the silver medal, those were my two highlights, thinking of the results. "But program-wise, the Grand Prix Final in Barcelona (where she placed second in 2016)," she continued. "I really felt like I was doing my programs without any doubts, [and] I felt really free. Program-wise, performance-wise, that was my best." Rock Stars on Ice performer Satoko Miyahara has participated in its shows in North America since 2022. (JAMES BENNETT) After addressing the glorious moments of a career that earned her seven medals at the Japan Championships, Ice Time wanted to know if she had any competitive regrets. "I don't have any competitions that I regret, but if I can say one, the very last season of my career," Miyahara remembered, referring to her fifth-place finish at the 2021 Japan Championships. "It was the selection competition for the Olympics. I fell on my [triple] lutz and, I don't know, but if I landed it, I might have been selected for the Beijing Olympics." Miyahara continued: "I still question if I had landed it, but it is what it is and I don't regret it at all. I'm so happy right now, so I have no regrets." Satoko Miyahara in 2018. (ⒸSANKEI) To call Miyahara's family successful is a bit of an understatement, as both of her parents are doctors. Ice Time asked for specifics on their fields of practice. "My mom is a hematologist and my father is a lung surgeon," Miyahara noted. Growing up around that high level of professional achievement, I wondered if she felt any anxiety about life after skating. "I don't feel any pressure, because my parents really respect my opinions," Miyahara commented. "They say, 'You should do whatever you want to do.' " She then said, "They support me a lot. Maybe a tiny bit they would like me to attend medical school. I don't know. This is my guess. They really respect me and I respect them." Miyahara, who won the Four Continents Championships in 2016, confessed that she does not have a firm plan about her future path at this time. "I actually do not know what I want to do," Miyahara remarked, adding, "I just want to experience whatever I can. Whatever comes along my path, I would like to try everything and see what I want to do and what I don't want to do. I am searching for what I want to do." Added Miyahara, "I just have to see what I want to do in the future. I think because I don't know what I want to do after skating, that is making me feel worried a little bit." Satoko Miyahara (front row, center) and other members of the 2025 Rock Stars on Ice tour. (SATOKO MIYAHARA/via INSTAGRAM) As she continues her career as a professional skater, Miyahara has begun to dabble in choreography, including creating a new exhibition program for three-time world champion Kaori Sakamoto. Ice Time wanted to learn the origin of that arrangement. "I recently started to work with some kids and I did one show program with a senior girl, Miyabi Oba," Miyahara stated. "She's my great, great friend. Because I did that a lot of skaters thought, 'Oh, you do choreography?' Kaori was one of the skaters, and she just texted me, 'Is it OK if I ask you to make my exhibition program?' "I was like, 'It is such an honor, but are you sure that you want me to make your exhibition program?' Miyahara recalled. "And she was like, 'I would love you to.' " Miyahara admitted she had some trepidation about the task. "I was a bit nervous, but I wanted to take on that challenge," Miyahara said, adding, "I really love Kaori, so I accepted it." While she enjoys doing choreography, Miyahara isn't considering it as a primary vocation looking ahead. "I don't see myself doing choreography as a main job in the future. But as a life experience and to bring it to my next career," Miyahara stated. "I think it is going to be a great opportunity and experience. For now, I really enjoy working on choreography and studying about it. It could be a side job in the future." The 152-cm Miyahara was coached by Mie Hamada for her entire career. Ice Time asked for her thoughts on the legendary mentor, who is still going strong. Mie Hamada (KYODO) "She started coaching me when I was seven and a half," and "basically brought me to the Olympics. Baby to the Olympics. She taught me all the basic skills and skating skills, and how to practice, how to train, how to train off ice." Satoko Miyahara on mentor Mie Hamada Added Miyahara, "She brought me to all the amazing choreographers overseas, jump coaches, spin coaches. [And] she took me everywhere that we could go. I think that made me a good skater. I really appreciate her." Having learned under a prominent coach for so many years, the question of whether Miyahara would someday like to coach herself was broached. "Not for now," Miyahara stated. "I have been thinking about if I really want to coach after finishing competing. But so far, I never felt that I wanted to be a coach. It is very difficult." One new assignment that Miyahara has taken on is that of a director for the Japan Skating Federation, which she assumed in September 2024. I asked how that opportunity came about and what it entails. "Ito-san (JSF chief Hidehito Ito) called me and he asked me if I would like to try or not," Miyahara recalled. "He asked if it was OK if he selected me as a director. I had no idea at that time what I could do. [And] I thought it might be a good chance to contribute to the skating world. So I thought I would like to try it." Miyahara then gave a brief description of what her role with the JSF is. "There are a few faculties in the JSF," she noted. "I am in the headquarters. There are meetings and I attend those meetings. We talk about events and how the event went. We discuss how we can make things better. That is what I am doing now. I am still learning about how it all works. We meet once a month, in Tokyo or online." Miyahara's popularity among the skating public and her fellow skaters is well known. Her sublime skating skills, dedication to her craft, and ability to interact with her fellow competitors through the years have made her a highly respected figure in the sport. Kaori Sakamoto (left) and Satoko Miyahara are seen at the Fantasy on Ice show at Makuhari Messe in Chiba on May 31. (KYODO) Ice Time queried Miyahara on who she considered her best friends in skating after all these years. "That is such a hard question," Miyahara replied. "In Japan, probably Kaori, Wakaba [Higuchi] and Rika Hongo. Those three are the closest. Of the boys, Kazuki [Tomono] and Koshiro [Shimada]. I am pretty close to them." Miyahara then said, "I grew up competing with Shoma [Uno], so I know a lot about him. I am very close with [coach and choreographer] Stephane Lambiel, [and] I am also close with the Stars on Ice family members." From left, Japanese skaters Yuzuru Hanyu, Satoko Miyahara, Akiko Suzuki and Takahito Mura are seen in this commemorative photo at a Noto Peninsula reconstruction charity performance in September 2024 in Kanazawa. (©Toru Yaguchi/via SANKEI) Miyahara said she has enjoyed the annual multi-city tours of Canada and the United States with the SOI team. "It's really fun because I like to travel and see the city," Miyahara commented before adding, "it's very interesting to see all the places. I don't really know exactly on the map which city is where, but it's so amazing that I can see all the places and skate there. It's hard to say which city is the best." Miyahara mentioned that the evening performances give her a chance to explore the different stops on the tours. "It's amazing because I get to see all the different venues and rinks," she noted. "We have the shows. Usually Sundays are matinees. Weekdays it is from 7 PM, so I have time during the mornings to walk around." Having spent so much time outside Japan for training, competitions, and shows in her career, Ice Time wanted to know if she was interested in living abroad at some point in the future. "I would like to have the chance to live overseas someday," Miyahara replied with a smile. Author: Jack Gallagher The author is a veteran sports journalist and one of the world's foremost figure skating experts. Find articles and podcasts by Jack on his author page , and find him on X (formerly Twitter) @sportsjapan .


Global News
2 hours ago
- Global News
Jared Leto denies reported sexual misconduct allegations by 9 women
NOTE: The following article contains disturbing details. Please read at your own discretion. Jared Leto has denied allegations of sexual misconduct after multiple women came forward and accused the 53-year-old actor and singer of behaving inappropriately toward them, with some claiming they were underage. In a report published by digital weekly Air Mail on Saturday, nine women alleged that the Suicide Squad actor behaved inappropriately toward them and has a long-standing pattern of sexual misconduct. A representative for Leto told the outlet that 'all of the allegations are expressly denied.' The rep also denied an earlier allegation from Allie Teilz, a DJ who claimed in an Instagram Story posted last month that she was 'assaulted and traumatized' by Leto. His rep said that 'Ms. Teilz's allegations are demonstrably false.' Story continues below advertisement Teilz said she was 17 years old when she had her interaction with Leto. She reposted a 2012 Facebook status update on Instagram last month, writing, 'Youre (sic) not really in L.A. until Jared Leto tries to force himself on you backstage … In a kilt.. And a snow hat.' View image in full screen A screenshot of Allie Teilz's Instagram Stories. allieteilz / Instagram In a follow-up post, Teilz wrote, 'I was assaulted and traumatized by that creep when I was 17. He knew my age and didn't care. What he did was predatory, terrifying and unacceptable.' Get breaking National news For news impacting Canada and around the world, sign up for breaking news alerts delivered directly to you when they happen. Sign up for breaking National newsletter Sign Up By providing your email address, you have read and agree to Global News' Terms and Conditions and Privacy Policy Among the allegations in the article from Air Mail, Leto is accused of walking out of a room naked in front of a 17-year-old girl and exposing himself and masturbating before putting an 18-year-old's hand 'on him.' He is also accused of asking sexual questions to a 16-year-old girl. 'It's been an open secret for a long time,' an anonymous woman told Air Mail. Story continues below advertisement Another accuser, model Laura La Rue, said she met Leto at an animal rights benefit in 2008 in Beverly Hills, Calif. She said she attended the event with her mom and she told Leto that she was 16 and he still allegedly asked for her number. La Rue said she began exchanging emails with Leto and visited him at his music studio several times. She also said that when she visited Leto's home in April 2009, she remembers him 'teasing me the whole time I was there.' 'He was flirting with me. He'd lean in close, then pull away, like it was a game,' La Rue added. She said when she was 17, Leto walked out of a room completely naked and she 'thought maybe this was just what adult men do.' In response to La Rue's allegations, Leto's rep told Air Mail that 'their communications contain nothing sexual or inappropriate.' Story continues below advertisement The rep also claimed that La Rue had 'applied to work as Mr. Leto's personal assistant, further underscoring the absence of anything inappropriate in any of their interactions.' La Rue has denied applying for the position. Another woman said she was 16 years old when Leto approached her at Urth Caffé in Los Angeles in 2008 and 'got' her number. She said that days later, Leto called her home in the middle of the night with the 'weirdest, grossest voice' and she said she didn't 'know if he was on drugs.' Leto's rep disputed her claims and said the singer 'has not had a drink or used drugs in over 35 years.' The woman also alleged that after she turned down an invitation to attend a party, Leto continued to call her in the early mornings over the course of three weeks. 'And the conversations turned sexual,' she alleged. 'He'd ask things like, 'Have you ever had a boyfriend? Have you ever sucked a d—?'' 'He changed — his voice, the way he talked. It scared me. That was the first time I thought, 'Oh my God, that's not just in movies.'' The woman's mother also told the outlet she had overheard a phone call and confirmed her daughter's story. Story continues below advertisement Another anonymous woman said she was underage when she began texting with Leto and claimed the House of Gucci actor would ask her uncomfortable questions when she would visit his home. She said once she turned 18 'he suddenly pulled his penis out and started masturbating.' 'Then he walked over, grabbed my hand, and put it on him,' she alleged. 'He leaned in and said, 'I want you to spit on it.'' Another anonymous woman said she was 'definitely not the youngest person there' when she attended one of Leto's parties at his home in the 2000s when she was 18. She claimed that the focus of the party appeared to be to get girls to skinny-dip in his pool. Leto's rep said 'there was never any recruiting, complaints or impropriety' and nightlife promoter Brent Bolthouse, who organized many parties at Leto's home, told Air Mail he 'never saw anyone skinny-dipping.'


Toronto Sun
3 hours ago
- Toronto Sun
Olympic star Ryan Lochte and Playboy model reportedly in debt mess amid divorce revelation
U.S. Olympic swimming hero and estranged wife reportedly are nearly$370Gs in debt Former U.S. Olympian Ryan Lochte and ex-Playboy model Kayla Rae Reid. Instagram The divorce between former U.S. Olympic swimming star Ryan Lochte and his ex-Playboy model wife Kayla Rae Reid has taken a big twist. This advertisement has not loaded yet, but your article continues below. THIS CONTENT IS RESERVED FOR SUBSCRIBERS ONLY Subscribe now to read the latest news in your city and across Canada. Unlimited online access to articles from across Canada with one account. Get exclusive access to the Toronto Sun ePaper, an electronic replica of the print edition that you can share, download and comment on. Enjoy insights and behind-the-scenes analysis from our award-winning journalists. Support local journalists and the next generation of journalists. Daily puzzles including the New York Times Crossword. SUBSCRIBE TO UNLOCK MORE ARTICLES Subscribe now to read the latest news in your city and across Canada. Unlimited online access to articles from across Canada with one account. Get exclusive access to the Toronto Sun ePaper, an electronic replica of the print edition that you can share, download and comment on. Enjoy insights and behind-the-scenes analysis from our award-winning journalists. Support local journalists and the next generation of journalists. Daily puzzles including the New York Times Crossword. REGISTER / SIGN IN TO UNLOCK MORE ARTICLES Create an account or sign in to continue with your reading experience. Access articles from across Canada with one account. Share your thoughts and join the conversation in the comments. Enjoy additional articles per month. Get email updates from your favourite authors. THIS ARTICLE IS FREE TO READ REGISTER TO UNLOCK. Create an account or sign in to continue with your reading experience. Access articles from across Canada with one account Share your thoughts and join the conversation in the comments Enjoy additional articles per month Get email updates from your favourite authors Don't have an account? Create Account The couple reportedly is deeply in debt. According to court documents obtained by Us Weekly , the estranged couple owes more than $369,000 to a variety of creditors, including the IRS. The Daily Mail reported that Lochte and Reid have an unpaid balance of $136,000 to the Internal Revenue Service from the years 2021 and 2022. On top of that, a lien was filed by Shands Teaching Hospital and Clinic for a total of nearly $230,000 stemming from two separate incidents. The first reportedly occurred in November 2023, when Lochte is said to have spent two days in a Gainesville medical facility for an unspecified treatment, accruing $175,000 in unpaid bills and another instance in February 2024, for an additional $54,000. This advertisement has not loaded yet, but your article continues below. Additionally, a lien of more than $3,000 was filed in December 2024 on their Gainesville, Fla., property by the local homeowners association. The Fletcher Park Owner's Association reportedly cited Lochte and Reid for several 'unpaid' fees, including 'special assessments, late fees, costs of collection (and) attorney's fees.' Lochte's legal team has yet to respond to Us Weekly 's request for comment on the situation. Lochte and Reid announced the divorce last week through their social media accounts. Reid, a former Playboy model, described ending the marriage as 'one of the most painful' decisions of her life. Read More Your noon-hour look at what's happening in Toronto and beyond. By signing up you consent to receive the above newsletter from Postmedia Network Inc. Please try again This advertisement has not loaded yet, but your article continues below. 'Earlier this year, I made the hard decision to end my marriage after deep prayer and reflection,' Reid wrote in the post, accompanied by a clip of her sitting outside. 'I hold marriage in the highest regard, so this has been one of the most painful, revealing and challenging seasons of my life. I've been hesitant to share until I could do so from a place of healing — not from fresh, open wounds. 'Sometimes we face trials we didn't choose or see coming. And in those moments, we're forced to make the hardest decisions to protect our peace, our children, and our future. I've come to the understanding that staying isn't always the most loving decision someone can make. For me, leaving was an act of love — for those around me and for myself. This advertisement has not loaded yet, but your article continues below. This advertisement has not loaded yet, but your article continues below. 'Living with transparency and authenticity has been how I have grown into the person I am today, and I'll continue to do so — while also protecting the parts of this journey that are private and unfolding in uncharted territory.' She also reshared the post to her Instagram Story, writing, 'Time to exhale' with a bandaged heart emoji. According to court records obtained by People, Reid filed for divorce from the retired swimmer on March 26. This advertisement has not loaded yet, but your article continues below. Lochte, now 40, is a 12-time Olympic medalist who also appeared in several reality TV series after retiring from competition. He shared his feelings about the split last Thursday, calling the decision to split a 'difficult' one. 'I want to take a moment to acknowledge what Kayla shared. This past year has brought major changes for both of us as we've come to the difficult decision to end our marriage,' Lochte wrote. This advertisement has not loaded yet, but your article continues below. 'I'm deeply grateful for the life we've built together and especially for the love we share for our three children. 'Although this decision hasn't been easy, I believe it's the right step toward peace and well-being for us both. I remain committed to healing, growth, and co-parenting with care and respect as we move forward separately.' Lochte and Reid share three children: Son Caiden Zane, 7, and daughters Liv Rae, 6, and Georgia June, who turns 2 on June 22. Canada Sunshine Girls World Golf Editorial Cartoons