The Apprentice: the Final, review: a worthy winner, but it's time to boot out the boss
The king of cool prevailed over the pizza princess. The Apprentice: The Final (BBC One) saw air conditioning mogul Dean Franklin edge out fast foodie Anisa Khan to clinch Lord Sugar's quarter-of-a-million-pound investment. The curmudgeonly Baron of Clapton should now retire and watch the money roll in. This show is looking more tired than its 78-year-old boss.
Over the past 12 weeks of buck-passing, backstabbing and besuited bluster, 18 cocky candidates had been whittled down to two. Likeable Essex boy Franklin wanted to take his home-grown air-con company to the next level. He needed Sugar's mentorship as much as his moolah. Academic high-achiever Khan had the worst record in the series but her Indian fusion pizzas were universally deemed delicious. Could she take a slice of a crowded market?
As is traditional, the wannabe tycoons had one last chance to convince the belligerent boss to make them his next business partner. Previously fired contestants returned to help (okay, hinder) as they designed branding and created ad campaigns, before pitching their ideas to industry experts. Both proved solid team leaders. It was their returning rivals who made the blunders.
Amber-Rose's shouty attempt at directing an advert for Anisa was cringe-making. Why was it set at a football stadium? Who orders pizza for delivery to Row Z? Meanwhile, hapless Liam bafflingly based the air-con commercial on heating – a secondary function, not its primary purpose. Only an aghast phone call from Dean averted disaster. The bedroom setting and hot-under-the-collar cast meant it still resembled a dodgy adult movie. Sugar's 'trusted advisors', Karren Brady and Tim Campbell, perfected the art of frowning in the background or shaking their heads in disbelief.
Come presentation time, Franklin strutted on-stage to 'Daddy Cool' by Boney M, then promptly forgot to take questions. Khan repeatedly referred to 'dark kitchens', which thankfully weren't as sinister (or under-lit) as they sounded. The climactic boardroom grilling was feel-good rather than fearsome. Campbell especially looked endearingly proud of his charges. Both would have made worthy winners but ultimately, chillers beat chillies.
The Apprentice remains grimly compelling in a hate-watch kind of way. However, its format has barely changed for 19 series. Too many tasks feel obsolete in this tech age. The emphasis on sales and squabbling is reductive. Those dated bodycon dresses and estate agent suits can be hung up. Sugar's pre-scripted boardroom 'jokes' should be consigned to the circular filing cabinet in the corner.
Most of all, it needs a new figurehead with a fresh approach. The original star of the US version, a certain Donald J Trump, moved on a decade ago. Sugar has taken root. The next series is his 20th. An apt time to step aside and let someone else haul the franchise into the future, dragging its wheely suitcase behind it.
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