Influencer invasions and pushy waiters: What infuriates us about the world's best-loved travel hotspots
A holiday is meant to be a case of sweetness and light; of unfettered relaxation on some idyllic shore – a glorious sunset illuminating the horizon, a chilled glass of rosé in hand.
Except, of course, that it doesn't always work that way. No matter how wonderful the destination you have chosen – from France in all its sophistication to Greece in its pastoral beauty – there will always be something to wipe the polish off your state of calm; a minor yet regular irritation.
If it is Japan, then it may be the lack of public bins – a recent survey by the Japan Tourism Agency saw 22 per cent of visitors list this particular scarcity as their main bugbear about the Land of the Rising Sun. But if it is America, Canada, Australia, Italy, or even the five-star beach oasis that is Dubai, then it may be another annoyance entirely.
Here, 10 Telegraph Travel experts reveal their personal peeves about some of the world's best-loved travel hotspots. By all mean, add your own frustrations in the comments.
Dubai
Influencer invasion
Nowhere is immune from the scourge of 'influencers', but Dubai pampers them like spoilt toddlers – and they're everywhere. Pouting in thongs beside your hotel pool, vlogging vacuous live-streams from the Burj Khalifa, hashtagging #blessed as they frolic on Kite Beach.
Wannabes can join Insta-themed tours which promise the chance 'to shoot the best pictures for your Instagram', while last month the tourist board announced it would launch the 'world's first dedicated [influencer] training programme', a three-month residency for budding 'content creators'. The UAE has such an extraordinary heritage and history, and surprisingly enchanting culture – but who cares when you can do selfies instead?
– Hazel Plush
Greece
Overly public lavatories
Perhaps I'm wrong in singling out the Land of Zeus for condemnation, but Greece seems to be the worst offender when it comes to this particular crime. You can almost guarantee that, whether you are on Crete, Kefalonia or somewhere in between, straying even a few steps from the trail will reap unpleasant rewards.
Behind every little archaeological site, or just uphill from any beautiful beach, there will be a stamped-down section amid the gorse and bushes, where there is evidence of human 'digestion', and the discarded scraps of tissue paper that are part of the process. Aphrodite must be holding her nose in disgust.
– Chris Leadbeater
USA
Cut the conversation
It's not the tipping. It's not the lack of public transport. It's not even their embarrassingly flimsy plug sockets. No ma'am, it's the way every interaction takes twice as long as necessary because 'How are you today?' 'Where are you guys from?' 'That is super-exciting!' and 'You're so welcome!'. You know what would really make us 'have a great day now'? You shutting up.
– Ed Grenby
Japan
Slipper etiquette
There are innumerable cultural shocks when visiting Japan, most of them wonderful. Then there are the slippers. No amount of planning can prevent you from making a huge middle-of-the-night gaff in your ryokan when you slip on the wrong set to pop to the loo or, God forbid, forget to put on slippers as you enter.
– Robin McKelvie
Canada
Modesty and name-dropping
There is an irritating little irony about Canada: Canadians are slyly, but unfailingly, immodest about their modesty. Pleasant humility is their thing and, boy, do they know it, humbly broadcasting the fact to all and sundry. This is, notably, in comparison with the US – to which, Canadians imply, their great modesty makes them superior.
Nor can these splendid folk stop themselves from claiming famous people as their own, lest we think that the stars be from the US. Should you be talking films or music and conversation include Jim Carrey, Ryans Reynolds or Gosling, Pamela Anderson, Joni Mitchell, k.d. Lang, Alanis Morissette, The Weeknd, Neil Young, Leonard Cohen, Rush or Arcade Fire, you may be sure that their Canadian-ness will not go unmentioned. They might make an exception for Justin Bieber.
– Anthony Peregrine
Australia
Worry-free frustrations
Maybe it's the coffee (and don't get me started on their tedious obsession with coffee), but why are Australians so relentlessly, vacuously, gratingly, aggressively cheerful all the sodding time? They breeze through life like it's one long beach barbecue, all sunshine grins and 'No worries, mate!'. But what if we want to worry?
– Ed Grenby
Italy
Queuing qualms
It's always better to book two weeks instead of one when you travel to Italy. One week to enjoy La Dolce Vita and an extra one to allow for all the time you lose when you get ambushed from left, right and centre by locals in your futile attempts to politely queue.
Robin McKelvie
France
Pushy waiters and public toilets
Surprisingly, for a nation devoted to eating and drinking, France has only recently got the hang of public toilets. And then not always. They may still appear as though someone has placed walls randomly around a swamp. Send in someone sturdy – a husband usually suffices – to check them out first.
Talking of food and drink – which the French do 83 per cent of the time – they may go on about local cheeses, several interesting ways with rabbit, or a sublime rosé-de-Provence until you wish to hit them with a microwave oven. Resist the urge or you'll not be invited back. Also steaks, which the French like so bloody that they might have come direct from a war zone. There's a macho element to this. French waiters will sneer at the words: 'medium well' / ' assez bien cuit '. Ignore the blighters.
– Anthony Peregrine
UK
Child-friendly conundrums
On the Med, family holidays mean savouring the simple pleasures of days on the beach with Nonna and long nights on restaurant terraces. Breaks with kids in the UK are a completely different experience.
Our preoccupation with segregating the youngest generation means they're turfed out of pubs and restaurants by 7pm in some places, and forced to eat from menus of nuggets and burgers before that. Much later, ravenous parents must cobble together silent second dinners for themselves back at the apartment while their children sleep. Somebody also seems to have decreed that kids can only visit places designed especially for them. Thus, every farm has a soft play and every castle has an adventure playground. And, in every one of those, there are lines of bored parents wondering when they can go home.
– Amanda Hyde
Austria
Nude nuisance
After a long, hard day on the slopes, there's nothing more soothing than a well-earned session in the hotel spa – until, that is, you see a flash of bare bottom as you turn the corner towards the sauna. Nudity is widespread across Europe's wellness centres, where mere hand towels are all that stand between you and your modesty. But it's in Austria where I've often felt most under pressure to bare all.
It's a shame really. As a nation, Austria is home to some of Europe's finest spa hotels. But far too often have I been chased away from my relaxation by the dreaded 'sauna attendant' after they caught a glimpse of a swimsuit strap. I once endured a 'sauna show' at the encouragement of a hotel owner – those 45 minutes, as our host waved hot towels and slapped around ice for the nude (and sweating) audience, soundtracked by the James Bond playlist, will be forever etched in my memory.
Call me a prude, or even immature, but no number of claims about cleanliness will encourage me to relax when I know the last person in my place was led bare. For now, I'll retreat to the safety of the clothed relaxation room and let my aching body scream with regret.
Did we miss any? Let us know your biggest holiday bugbears below...
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