Woman Calls Out Family's Double Standards After Being Told Housework Is 'Just for Girls'

Yahoo

2 days ago

A woman who lives at home with her whole family was surprised recently when her mom put her to work cleaning the house — but let her brothers continue playing video games
The siblings are all adults, and the woman constantly sees her parents give her brothers a pass while making the poster and her sister do gendered jobs at home
Now, she is seeking advice from fellow Redditors about how to proceedA woman is seeking support from the Reddit community after a frustrating experience at home left her questioning her own actions.
At 22, she lives with her parents, three brothers and a younger sister, and recently found herself at the center of a family debate about fairness and household chores.
She explains in her post, 'The house needed a deep clean, and I suggested that it would be faster and fairer if everyone pitched in - not just the girls.' To her surprise, her mother initially agreed, saying, 'That sounds like a good idea.'
Encouraged by this, she thought her family was finally on the same page about sharing responsibilities.
However, things quickly took a turn. Her mother assigned her to vacuum all the carpets and gave her sister other chores, while her brothers continued playing video games in the next room.
'I started wondering when my brothers were going to be called in to help,' she recalls, noting that they seemed entirely exempt from the cleaning effort.
When she brought up the issue, her mother dismissed her concerns. 'She basically told me to be quiet and just do the work,' she writes. Feeling the situation was unfair, she pressed further, only to be met with anger from her mother, who snapped, 'Never in my life have I seen a girl act like this. Aren't you embarrassed?'
Trying to reason with her mother, she reminded her of the earlier agreement that everyone should help, but was quickly shut down. Her mother replied, 'I never said we would actually do that. They're boys. You and your sister are girls. This is your job.'
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The young woman felt the weight of traditional gender roles in her family, where men are expected to work outside and women handle the inside chores.
As she points out, her brothers are all adults now, but they don't have jobs and aren't expected to do either the 'man jobs' or the 'woman jobs.' 'They're free to sit around and play video games & don't have to help anyone while my sister and I do all the work,' she laments.
Seeking some backup, she turned to her father, hoping he might intervene. Instead, she was met with indifference. 'He just ignored me and kind of mocked me,' she explains.
Frustrated and feeling unheard, she decided to stop doing the chores all together as a form of protest. This decision only escalated tensions at home. 'My mom is now really angry at me and thinks I'm being disrespectful and lazy,' she says.
Despite the backlash, she remains conflicted. 'I feel like I'm just standing up for what's fair, but part of me wonders if I'm being a jerk by refusing to help now,' she writes.
"This is sexist behavior. You're an adult, so I'd recommend you start to prepare for moving out and building a life on your own terms," writes one commenter.
Adds another, "I'd be ashamed to raise boys to believe they could sit on their arses gaming while the females cleaned the house. Your parents are setting them up to completely fail in life."
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