Scots vampire TikToker's goth alter ego 'helped her confidence after motherhood'

Daily Record

09-07-2025

'For a long time, I felt really lost in myself, and I didn't really know how to express myself properly, or how to separate me from the mum that I had become.'
A young stay-at-home mum who presents as a vampire in her spare time, wearing corsets and fake fangs and filming in graveyards, has said this alter ego allows her to be 'more confident'.
Kat, 22, who is originally from Poland but now lives in West Lothian shares videos of her vampire alter ego 'Katarina' with her 14,000 TikTok followers under the handle @zokatsen.
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Having been bullied as a child for being 'weird' and 'different', Kat says her online alter ego has helped her find her identity after feeling 'lost' in early motherhood.
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She takes inspiration from Victorian-era fabrics, pairing black and red silk or lace with white linen and cotton pieces that feature Romantic details like flouncy sleeves, layering them with gothic-inspired jewellery adorned with bat motifs.
Despite receiving hate online and 'strange looks' in public for her appearance, Kat, who does not wish to disclose her surname for privacy reasons, has found a community of fellow goths and aims to inspire other mothers to pursue their passions.
Her dream would be for her online persona to lead to paid acting roles, and she will be going into her second year studying creative writing at university from September 2025.
'Even though Katarina is a character, she and I are two sides of the same coin,' Kat told PA Real Life.
'She allows me to be more confident, more outwardly somebody that maybe I don't feel so confident being in my own life.'
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After moving to Scotland from Poland aged two-and-a-half, Kat's journey into the gothic subculture began in childhood, with a love of the film The Corpse Bride and the musical The Phantom Of The Opera.
At school, Kat said she was verbally and physically bullied by other girls for being 'outspoken', as well as for her Minecraft YouTube channel – her first foray into content creation.
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'Throughout my childhood, there was definitely a pattern of me being considered weird and different, and people trying to stamp that out,' Kat said.
'In high school, that's when the more physical stuff started – pulling hair, standing on my shoes, walking behind me, following me, and then your usual yelling out abuse.'
During the Covid-19 pandemic, Kat began experimenting with her appearance, starting with dramatic eyeliner.
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Her go-to products include Revolution SFX white base, NYX eyeshadow and Rimmel eyeliner – but she focuses on budget-friendly choices.
'I love Vinted – just these random gems that you find,' she said.
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'I also try to alter any clothing that I maybe don't like any more, but I could make something else out of it.'
Kat's daughter, who she wishes to keep anonymous, was born in May 2023, and she initially threw herself into motherhood, sidelining other parts of her identity.
'For a long time, I felt really lost in myself, and I didn't really know how to express myself properly, or how to separate me from the mum that I had become,' she said.
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'I felt like I had to completely lock away any of my desires, any of my needs, and just put my daughter first, because if I didn't do that, I wouldn't have been able to cope.'
Kat said she was still in a relationship with her daughter's father at the time, but they have since broken up.
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She said she knows any future partner would need to support her alternative lifestyle.
'I probably would want to date somebody that is also in the subculture, maybe somebody that has also experienced being shunned for what they really enjoyed doing,' she said.
'Just because I wouldn't be able to be with someone that I didn't really relate to in that way, and I wouldn't want to dampen my own personality and how outwardly myself I have become.'
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It is at night – when vampires typically prowl – that Kat finds time to create her TikTok content.
'Since I've been a teenager, I find it a lot easier to function at night,' Kat said.
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She creates videos in which her comedic vampire persona Katarina 'navigates the world of human alternative culture'.
In one of her most popular videos, which has more than 340,000 views, Katarina visited Frankenstein's Bar in Edinburgh, acting confused by modern human customs.
She also films in graveyards, spaces Kat says she has always found 'peaceful'.
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While Kat does occasionally use fake fangs in her videos, she uses special effects to edit red eyes in after recording, as she 'struggles' with contact lenses, and this also saves time as a busy mum.
Kat draws on her childhood experience as a youth theatre member to bring Katarina to life.
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She also takes inspiration from vampire-themed media including Netflix's animated series Castlevania, and comedy mockumentary What We Do In The Shadows – with TikTokers drawing comparisons between her and Natasia Demetriou's character, Nadja.
'Katarina says that Nadja is one of her best friends from the United States, so they're kind of spiritual sisters in that sense,' explained Kat.
Out of some of the more mainstream vampire series, Kat prefers The Vampire Diaries to the Twilight franchise.
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'I watched The Vampire Diaries when I was younger, and I really enjoyed that,' said Kat.
'However, Katarina would hate Twilight because she thinks that it is a completely inaccurate representation of vampires and that it spreads a lot of misconceptions about her kind.'
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She added: 'I really enjoy acting. That love for theatre has stuck with me – it's a core part of who I am.
'Even though I'm playing a character, I try to incorporate my own values, my belief system and who I am.'
Despite the growth of the channel leading to opportunities including an advert for ITVX's vampire collection, Kat's appearance – online and in real life – has not been without backlash.
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'I don't get many comments (in real life), but I do see disapproval on some people's faces,' Kat said.
'Online, I've had hate comments from 'putting on eyeliner doesn't make you goth' to 'you can't be a good mum looking like that'.
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'There is no filter online – people just say the most horrible things, and they have no repercussions for that.'
As a young single mum, Kat said she initially turned to the internet for help with her parenting journey but quickly felt 'overwhelmed' by influencer culture.
'When my daughter was born, I really felt a lot of pressure to live up to that outwards appearance of a put-together mum,' she said.
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'I had a lot of difficulties with breastfeeding and had to combi-feed… but I eventually realised that every child is so unique, and there is no right way to be a mum.'
Kat intends to keep her daughter's life private until she is old enough to make an informed choice about being online – although she would 'love' to make mother-daughter content one day if her daughter wanted to.
Her advice to other young or alternative mums is simple: be yourself.
'Nobody should be forced to change who they are to be a good mother – it's not sustainable,' Kat said.