Macron is wrong — the best baguette is a binned baguette
However, amid the howls of Gallic outrage, we are in danger of missing the point: the best baguette is a binned baguette and six out of ten French people admit to doing just that with at least part of it. But my top tip after you've been to the boulangerie and carried your baguette home is to feed it to the birds and have a croissant instead. Or not, because croissants are overrated too, and don't get me started on brioche, or pain complet, which tastes like doormats, or pain de mie, the runt of the litter and the ideal choice for what, exactly? You're never at a loss with a poppy seed bloomer, but pain de mie?
Naturally, a country that takes itself so seriously that it polices its own language, tries also to police its own bread. La vraie baguette has to be 55 to 65cm long and weigh 250 to 300g, because otherwise the sky will fall in or it might be a ficelle, not a baguette, so watch out for the language police. President Macron once said that baguettes are '250 grams of magic and perfection in our daily lives', which shows how much he knows. Unesco has added baguettes to a list of the world's 'intangible cultural heritage', alongside Syrian soap and Estonian mash, a clear disservice to Syrian soap and Estonian mash.
• Is French food really the best in the world?
Yet the popularity of this sorry attempt at baking is fuelled by a romantic myth that you'll break off a chunk and eat it with camembert, in the perfect picnic spot. There will be a river meandering close by and no wasps. How many of us can say that we have ever, even once, achieved that? Is it worth persevering with what should, by any reasonable measure, be a doomed form of carbs on the off-chance that we might? Baguettes are stale by the time you've left the shop. You're more likely to eat them sitting in a traffic jam on the autoroute du Soleil than a water meadow in the Dordogne, and the kids will be bored witless in both.
They are an inefficient shape. They taste of cotton wool and crust, compared to, say, a poppy seed bloomer, which tastes of poppy seeds and loveliness. And lest the French feel singled out, the same applies to Italian bread. Has anyone ever truly enjoyed a grissini? Foccacia's all very well, but no one would care if they never ate it again. Anything served on ciabatta would be better off not, and that crispy poppadom thing, pane carasau? No.
Nor is it just a European thing, because anything baked with yeast in America is instantly suspect. I love America. Some of my best friends are American. But you just can't trust a country that invented waffles and serves biscuits with gravy. And the darkest and most important truth about this most important of subjects isn't the length of baguettes in France, it's the ubiquity of sourdough in England. You can't buy anything that isn't sourdough any more. A baguette isn't any less pointless for making it sourdough and a muffin is not improved by it. Where have all the good, plain bloomers gone? To the barricades, citizens, and let us abolish all this fancy foreign sourdough. Unless it's too hot. Or raining. Or August.
An email arrives from someone senior and apologetic at M&S, admitting that in its recent hack, 'some personal customer data has been taken … this could include contact details, date of birth and online order history'. There is, she adds, 'no evidence that it has been shared', perhaps showing a slight naivety about what hacking is for.
Now, hacking and its co-defendant, scamming, are obviously very bad things, a modern curse with terrible consequences and hapless victims. But the M&S hackers will now be armed with knowledge of my bra size and that I recently bought a hair clip and returned a light fitting. Was it worth it, I asked a friend. 'Yes,' she replied. 'That's invaluable information, if you're a plastic surgeon performing breast reductions in a well-lit hair salon.'
• Marks & Spencer shuts out WFH staff after cyberattack
Lucy Worsley, promoting her new Lady Swindlers podcast, has said, 'We still recognise those situations where women feel they have to marry for money.' I think her point is that she feels sorry for such women, but honestly, Lucy? Would that I had.
I'm halfway through doing up a house. I spend my days adding up columns of figures wrong and my nights worrying about it. I count plug sockets, not sheep, and wonder if, perhaps, electricity is overrated, because do you have any idea how much nice light switches cost? Off the top of my head, I'm fairly sure that my relationship history isn't replete with chances to marry money, but is it too late? And could he be persuaded to invest in some plugs?
• Lucy Worsley interview: 'I don't mind sexist trolls — they can just get on with it'
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Daily Mail
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- Daily Mail
Emily Ratajkowski shares her raciest photos yet as she STRIPS DOWN to string bikinis on summer vacation
left little to the imagination in a tiny bikini while enjoying a European summer getaway over the weekend. On Saturday, the model, 34, took to Instagram to share several photos and videos of herself frolicking around Italy in a barely-there bikini top and cheeky bottoms. She shared a sultry snapshot of her backside in an animal-print thong while standing on the edge of an infinity pool with the iconic view of the colorful houses in Positano in the background. On her Instagram Story, she also kept her 29 million followers tuned in as she documented herself partying on a yacht in skimpy swimsuits with her friends. She also included snapshots of herself partaking in wholesome activities, such as collecting colorful stones on the beach with her four-year-old son Sylvester Apollo Bear, whom she shares with her ex-husband Sebastian Bear-McClard. The Gone Girl actress — who flaunted her fit physique in a plunging, thong one-piece swimsuit during a boating excursion just one day earlier — showed off her adventures while taking care of her son as she wined and dined with close friends throughout the vibrant city. In one adorable snapshot in her photo album, her son was seen sleeping on a pile of towels. He appeared to be snoozing peacefully after presumably snorkeling with his mom as Ratajkowski can be seen sitting next to him and a pair of goggles placed on the table. The model also included a photo of Positano at night, lit up by lights, as well as a candid portrait of her friends and their kids. She posted photos of the extravagant seafood meals she enjoyed while on vacation. Ratajkowski also posted a clip of scantily-clad self in a bikini as she jumped off a boat and into the ocean, where her friend and her son were swimming. Her son Sly was also at her side while sunbathing at the beach, at one point, as seen in another photo of her son sitting in her lap as she laid on a chaise. She included a snapshot of her friend pouring a glass of white wine on a patio with a view as well as a picture of her backside while on another yachting excursion. She posted photos of her son's spaghetti alongside a plate of grilled fish and another short clip of her diving into the ocean in synchronization.
Times
2 hours ago
- Times
14 of the best all-inclusive cruise lines
Once the preserve of the ultra-luxurious, all-inclusive cruising is now becoming the norm across a much broader spectrum of sailings. While full board and accommodation remain standard, more and more lines are throwing in extras like wi-fi, tips, drinks and curated excursions — sparing you from the creeping costs that used to accumulate day by day at sea. That means fewer shocks when presented with your final bill, particularly for those travelling with families. Of course, not all all-inclusive packages are created equal. Some lines offer fizz on tap and butler-drawn baths strewn with petals (yes, really), while others keep things simpler through immersive expeditions such as pasta-making lessons in Bologna. Whether you're drawn to chandeliers and caviar or vineyard bike rides and Galapagos landings, these are the cruise lines doing all-inclusive best. This article contains affiliate links that will earn us revenue Ultra-luxury cruise line Silversea operates a fleet of 13 ships, of which five are smaller expedition ships. Silversea's offering is the last word in luxury afloat, with butler service, fine dining in a choice of restaurants, and everything you could imagine included, from champagne and caviar round the pool to a scented bath run by your butler and strewn with flower petals. Silversea sails all over the world. The expedition ships Silver Explorer, Silver Cloud, Silver Wind and Silver Endeavour visit the poles, while the sleek Silver Origin is based year-round in the Galapagos. The classic fleet (ships that don't offer expeditions) sails the Mediterranean in summer, with long cruises in winter that circle the globe. What's included? Silversea has two price bands. 'Door-to-door' includes a chauffeur-driven car to the airport, business-class flights, transfers, all dining on board (except the fancy French restaurant La Dame, which costs £50pp), an open bar, crew tips, wi-fi and a choice of excursions. 'Port-to-port' pricing includes all this apart from the chauffeur and flight. Price £££ Part of holiday giant Tui, Marella operates four older cruise ships, aimed at a price-conscious British market. Three are family-friendly, while Marella Explorer 2 is for adults only. A fifth ship, Marella Voyager, joined the fleet in 2023. Its ships are friendly and relaxed, but Marella's biggest selling point is the fact that it includes flights from several regional UK airports. Destinations include the Mediterranean and the Caribbean, with new departures in 2023 from the USA. On board, expect a mix of cabin grades and sizes; these are older ships, built before the days when almost every cabin had a balcony. Food and entertainment are geared to British tastes. A plus on Marella Explorer and Marella Explorer 2 is a huge Champneys spa, the only such collaboration at sea. What's included? Meals in the main dining venues, open bar, crew tips, some classes in the gym, kids' clubs, flights and transfers. Excursions and speciality dining cost extra. Price £ Nobody could accuse river line Uniworld of operating cookie-cutter ships. Each of the line's 'Super Ships' is done out in an extravagant, opulent theme — from ornate baroque on SS Maria Theresa, plying the Danube, to tinkling chandeliers and Fortuny art deco on SS La Venezia, which sails the Venice lagoon. On board, everything is included, with creative shore excursions offering activities such as pasta-making in Bologna, or cycling in vineyard trails around Bordeaux. The line has 17 ships, including vessels on the Mekong, the Ganges and the Nile, as well as a ship on the Amazon operated in an arrangement with Aqua Expeditions. What's included? All meals, open bar, crew tips, wi-fi, excursions and activities, use of bicycles (most ships) and airport transfers. Flights are also included in some fares. Price £££ Celebrity Cruises operates a fleet of 12 big ships, the newest of which are decidedly swish, with interiors by Kelly Hoppen, cool pools featuring private cabanas and a roof garden bar and grill, among many other speciality restaurants. Three smaller ships are based year-round in the Galapagos. Its 16th ship, Celebrity Ascent, launches in autumn 2023. Celebrity recently introduced the option of 'All Included' fares, which means you don't pay any extra for drinks, crew tips or wi-fi. Some charges remain — for example, speciality dining and excursions — but these new fares are a good deal if you enjoy a couple of cocktails in the evening and wine with meals. What's included? Meals in the main dining rooms, drinks up to a certain value (including soft drinks, beer, wine and cocktails), crew tips, wi-fi, some classes in the gym, kids' clubs. Price ££ Azamara, which owns four stylish, mid-sized ships, provides destination-intensive cruises that spend longer in port than those of any other line. The ships are older, built around 1999, but have had multiple refits and passengers love their cosy, compact size. Food on board is excellent, with drinks included, although unless you're staying in a suite, there's a cover charge of £25 for the two speciality restaurants Prime C and Aqualina. There are also a couple of weekly treats. Every cruise includes a spectacular 'AzAmazing' event, which might involve ferrying all 690 passengers to a lavish cultural event ashore, or taking over a port or a venue for a festival of local food, drink and culture. The line is also known for its dazzling White Nights deck parties, which include a magnificent barbecue, flowing drinks and dancing under the stars. What's included? Dining, open bar, wi-fi, crew tips, AzAmazing events, some classes in the gym. Some fares include flights and transfers, too. Price ££ Regent's ships are very grand and reminiscent of opulent hotels, with lavish decor, sweeping staircases and elegant lounges. Seven Seas Splendor and Seven Seas Explorer also feature some of the most expensive suites at sea, the poshest of which even includes its own spa. The line has a loyal following, mainly mature Americans, and sails all over the world, from the Mediterranean to the Caribbean, Australia, Alaska and Asia. What's included? Everything on board — dining, including the various speciality dining restaurants, open bar, crew trips, wi-fi and valet laundry — and a choice of complimentary shore excursions plus, on some voyages, bolt-on land programmes. Fares include flights and often a pre-cruise hotel stay too. Price £££ Video: Times Travel boards a ship to bust the cruise myths SeaDream's two small yachts, taking just 112 passengers each, sail the Caribbean in winter and the Mediterranean in summer. Because they're so small, SeaDream I and SeaDream II can easily fit into fashionable small ports and anchorages like St Barts, Bequia or Hvar. Both vessels have had a significant upgrade so while you won't have a balcony cabin — these being older ships — the decor is infinitely Instagrammable. On board, the vibe is very much that of a house party on a private yacht. Life is informal — there's no dress code beyond superyacht chic, and you can even sleep on one of the squashy Balinese beds on deck if you want. Water sports equipment is carried on board and there's a marina platform at the back of the ship for swimming. No detail is spared in the excellent food. What's included? All meals, drinks, wi-fi, water sports, use of bicycles, most gym classes and crew tips. Travel and excursions are extra. Price £££ Australian-owned Scenic operates a fleet of state-of-the-art river ships in Europe and Asia, and has two ocean-going ships, the superyachts Scenic Eclipse and Scenic Eclipse II, which launched in 2023. Both have ice-class hulls, which means they can sail in Antarctica and northern polar regions, but they offer warm-weather cruising, too. And while they're small, carrying just 228 each, you'll find a surprisingly impressive range of speciality restaurants on board, from Asian to French, as well as 24-hour room service. Scenic's ethos is to be the most inclusive cruise line out there, so you can put the wallet away the minute you board — unless you want a ride in the helicopter and submarine on the expedition ships, that is. Expect a multinational audience that includes a lot of Australians, and a laid-back vibe on board. What's included? Cruise fares include all meals, drinks, gratuities, wi-fi, flights, a choice of excursions, and use of water toys and e-bikes. Price £££ Seabourn's seven ships are small, sleek and chic, with a vibe that's more private yacht than luxury cruise line. Expedition vessels Seabourn Venture and Seabourn Pursuit both come complete with two submarines. Seabourn's ships sail all over the world, from summer in the Mediterranean and Baltic to winter in the Caribbean, South America and Asia. Its expedition ships, built for polar cruising, explores Antarctica and, in summer, northern polar regions; it also offers warm-weather expeditions to destinations including the Amazon. There's a lot to love on board, from grill classics by renowned chef Thomas Keller to a wellness programme in collaboration with health guru Andrew Weil. The food and service are exceptional and the cabins, almost all with balcony, are spacious, with abundant Molton Brown goodies in the bathrooms. What's included? All meals, open bar, wi-fi, most classes in the gym, and crew tips. Most prices include flights and transfers. Excursions are extra, apart from on the expedition ships. Price £££ Ponant provides an all-inclusive cruise experience with more than a dash of French panache, thanks to partnerships with Veuve Clicquot and Charles Heidsieck champagne, chef Alain Ducasse, Diptyque and Brittany-based cheesemaker Jean-Yves Bordier. The line operates 13 ships, which vary from smart expedition vessels to the six Ponant Explorers, built for tropical cruising and each featuring a multi-sensory underwater lounge. There's also a hybrid-powered icebreaker, Le Commandant Charcot, which explores deep into Antarctica and offers regular expeditions to the North Pole in summer. The passenger mix is international, with a high proportion of French guests. What's included? All dining, open bar, wi-fi, classes in the gym, kids' clubs on some ships. Flights are included on some cruises, often from Paris, while most activities are covered on polar expeditions. Other excursions cost extra, as do crew tips. Price ££-£££ As well as its popular river fleet, Viking operates a fleet of ten elegant ocean-going ships, and two smart expedition ships, both built for polar expeditions. The ships sail all over the world, from Europe and the Caribbean to Asia and Australia, with cruises varying from the standard seven days to grand world voyages of more than 120 days. What's lovely about Viking's ships is the thoughtful decor, all soothing, Scandi-inspired chic and light-filled lounges, plus touches such as an infinity pool, a cool little nightclub, a lavish suite of saunas, steam and an ice grotto in the spa that's free to use. Every cabin has a balcony, too. What's included? All dining, drinks with meals, crew tips, wi-fi, excursions, flights, transfers, access to the spa thermal suite, some classes in the gym. Some excursions cost extra. Price: ££-£££ Emerald is best known for its smart, contemporary riverboats but has recently launched its first ocean-going ship, Emerald Azzurra, with a second ship, Emerald Sakara, launched in February 2023. Destinations include the Adriatic, Aegean, Middle East, Caribbean and Central America. If you like the idea of a very small ship, carrying just 100, with the feel of a private yacht in its elegant lines, infinity pool, Missoni Home amenities and top-deck cocktail bar, this could be the one. There are no butlers or speciality dining, but pretty well everything is included — and you can't put a price on occupying the best moorings in town alongside other superyachts, rather than in the wilderness of a cruise port, along with the 5,000-passenger ships. What's included? All dining, drinks with meals, crew tips, basic wi-fi, some excursions, flights, transfers, use of water toys and e-bikes. Price ££ Unapologetically geared towards the over-50s market, Saga is the cruise line to choose if you want to enjoy a relaxed experience in a blissfully child-free environment. It has a small fleet of four relatively new ships — the oldest debuted in 2017 while the newest first sailed in 2022 — plus boutique vessels that it charters for selected European sailings. Unique to Saga are the thoughtful extras, like travel insurance, unlimited luggage and door-to-door transfers and porterage. On its ocean-faring vessels, Spirit of Adventure and Spirit of Discovery, guests also enjoy a private balcony, and access to spa facilities including hydrotherapy pool, infrared sauna and steam room as standard. It sails to well-trodden destinations, from the US and the Caribbean to the Mediterranean and the Baltic Sea, with departures from the UK. What's included? All meals (including speciality restaurants) and drinks on board, 24-hour room service, wi-fi, excursions at selected ports, door-to-door transfers and travel insurance. Price ££ The new kid on the sailing block is Explora Journeys, MSC Group's foray into the luxury market. Its first ship, Explora I, made its maiden voyage in August 2023 and Explora II, III and IV are on the way. The experience is inspired by the ocean and, to that end, the public spaces inside and outside are designed to maximise the sea view, with floor-to-ceiling windows. Multigenerational travel is also encouraged by way of 78 connected suites. Elsewhere, there are six restaurants with one featuring a guest chef, and a sumptuous spa with a hydrotherapy pool, Finnish sauna and salt cave. What's included? Food and drinks (with upgrades available), wi-fi, gratuities, wellbeing programme onboard and in destination, and transfers from port to the city. Price ££ • Best Mediterranean cruises• The world's biggest cruise ships• Best cruise lines for solo travellers Additional reporting by Qin Xie and Imogen Lepere
Times
2 hours ago
- Times
11 of the best all-inclusive Mediterranean cruises
Whether you fancy cava on tap as you sail around Spain or a gelato a day on an Italian itinerary, an all-inclusive cruise means you'll want for nothing on a Mediterranean voyage. Without a final bill looming at the end of the cruise, you can relax and really enjoy your holiday, sampling new cuisines in the on-board restaurants, celebrating sail-away with a glass of fizz or even taking it easy by ordering breakfast on room service. Every cruise line differs so always check the details carefully before booking to be sure the fare includes all you'll need. Some may not cover important extras like gratuities or wi-fi, while pricier packages often throw in everything from laundry to shore excursions, but you might not want to pay for inclusions you won't need. Here's our pick of the best all-inclusive Mediterranean cruises. This article contains affiliate links that will earn us revenue Best for high-end suitesThere's no chance of being stuck in a pokey state room with Explora Journeys, the new line from MSC Group that launched its first ship, MSC Explora 1, in August 2023. Explora 2 is set to follow in summer 2024. All suites are oceanfront, with floor-to-ceiling windows, a walk-in wardrobe and a terrace with a daybed, plus nice-to-have extras including a Dyson hairdryer, Frette bed linen and Illy espresso machine. A stocked minibar, thermal spa access, gratuities, fitness programmes and wi-fi are all included, while guests have nine dining options including room service, a gelateria and creperie, a European steakhouse and an immersive pan-Asian restaurant with its own sake sommelier. Itineraries include a seven-night voyage from Lanzarote to Barcelona and a more in-depth 14-night tour of the Adriatic's most beautiful ports including Rovinj in Croatia and Nydri on the Greek island of for butler serviceThere's no need to lift a finger when cruising with Silversea. Its lavish all-inclusive package includes a personal butler for each suite who can help out with everything from filling your bath to cleaning your sunglasses. The fare also includes a complimentary shore excursion each day, champagne on tap, 24-hour room service, a chauffeur-driven car from your home and hotel nights where needed before or after the cruise. Mediterranean itineraries include seven-night round trips from either Athens or Fusina (Venice), calling at ports including the Croatian island of Hvar and Nafplion in Greece, where you'll find ancient ruins, rustic tavernas and quiet for paying only for what you wantThere's no point splurging on an all-bells-and-whistles-inclusive voyage if you barely drink, don't need wi-fi and don't fancy visiting speciality restaurants. New for 2024, Greek cruise line Celestyal offers two all-inclusive packages for maximum value. The Celestyal Experience fare includes complimentary dining, drinks with meals, entertainment and discounts on shore excursions, while the Plus+ Experience also includes premium drinks, speciality dining and wi-fi. Optional shore excursions encourage guests to get to know the real Greece — they include a cooking class in a local home in Mykonos and pottery-making and a meze lunch in for on-board activitiesGreat value all-inclusive fares from Fred Olsen don't skimp on entertainment options, with guest speakers, chart-reading sessions with the captain, cooking classes and even stargazing sessions over a hot toddy. There's also a house band, dance teachers, an art studio and a theatre company on each ship. Fares include all-day room service, afternoon tea and à la carte dinners — alcohol is extra, though reasonable packages can be added from £24.99 per person per night. Med itineraries sail from the UK so tend to be at least two weeks long, calling at ports including La Goulette in Tunisia and Gibraltar with its Moorish baths, cable car and the only wild monkeys in for luxuryExpect to be pampered when you sail on any of Seabourn's seven ships, all of which have a private yacht feel, with personal service and sumptuous extras included as standard. Fine wines, premium spirits, a bespoke in-suite bar, wi-fi, dining in any venue at any time and even unlimited caviar are all thrown in. Itineraries are more original than most too, calling at lesser-visited Med ports including pastel-coloured Greek fishing town Gythio, Andalusia's Almeria and the sleepy Greek island of Patmos, where St John is believed to have written the Book of Revelation. Best for regional UK departures The cost of travelling to a London airport can be an unwelcome extra on top of many cruise fares. Marella, which is part of Tui, includes departures from several UK regional airports, so it's easy to find a more convenient alternative. Cruise fares also cover luggage, transfers to the ship, selected drinks including certain spirits and house wine, gratuities and several informal dining options. Good-value Med itineraries include all the big-name stops including Barcelona, Civitavecchia for Rome and Malaga. • Best budget cruises in the Mediterranean• Best small-ship Mediterranean cruises Best for non-drinkersIf you prefer a juice to a gin and tonic, all-inclusive cruise fares can prove expensive. P&O's package includes coach transfers, dining at a range of restaurants, room service breakfast, plenty of entertainment and a formal five-course gala night dinner created by celebrity chef Marco Pierre White. A choice of four drinks packages can be added including one for soft drinks only and another alcohol-free bundle including Costa coffee, non-alcoholic beer and wine and a range of mocktails, so you can toast your arrival in must-see ports including Genoa, Dubrovnik and for all-day diningThere's no chance of going hungry on a Princess cruise. Meals are all covered but there are also sweet snacks aplenty on board for no extra cost, including complimentary soft serve ice cream on deck, popcorn dished out during open-air movies and freshly baked cookies available throughout the ship. Opt for a Princess Plus package — an extra £50 per day — and wi-fi, gratuities, drinks up to $15 (about £12), extra meals and other treats are included too. Med itineraries sail from Barcelona, Civitavecchia (Rome) or Piraeus (Athens) and tick off all the major ports along the way including Mykonos, Sicily and Marseilles. • Best Princess cruise ships Best for maximum shore timeAll Azamara's four ships hold around 700 passengers each so you can expect a boutique feel on board, plus more varied Med itineraries featuring smaller ports. Late-evening departures also mean plenty of time to explore the cobbled streets and shaded squares of Ermoupoli in Greece or the postcard-pretty harbour of Kotor in Montenegro. Back on board, room service, gratuities, self-service laundry, excellent food and selected alcoholic drinks are included in the standard fare, as is a weekly alfresco White Night party with entertainment, cocktails and an elaborate buffet for inclusionsYou'll struggle to find something to spend money on once you board a Scenic ship, unless you fancy a trip on its helicopter. Its all-inclusive package covers almost everything you can think of including the use of waterskis and kayaks, room service, self-service laundry, wi-fi and cooking classes that reflect the area the ship is travelling through. Med itineraries are a good mix of the bigger must-visit ports and underrated spots including Porto Santo Stefano in Tuscany and the French town of Collioure, once popular with artists such as Dali, Picasso and for a five-star hotel feelFrom its chic spas to the palatial suites, a Regent Seven Seas cruise feels more like staying in a top hotel. Every fare is all-inclusive and has every detail covered, including unlimited wi-fi, laundry, a stocked minibar, shore excursions and a pre-cruise hotel stay. Foodies are particularly spoiled with a range of chef-led shore excursions available for an extra charge, including a market tour and tapas meal in Bilbao, a foraging tour and on-board cooking class in Corfu, and lunch at a two-Michelin-star restaurant in Barcelona — plus a peek in the kitchens. • Best eastern Mediterranean cruises• Best 14-day Mediterranean cruises
