22 Married Folks Who Gave Up Major Things In Their Relationships, And Yearn For Their Wild, Single Days
Welp, married folks went RIGHT into it, and weren't afraid to admit what they miss about "being free" and the dating world.
So, here are some small but pretty huge things married people miss about being single:
1."Autonomy — plain and simple. I don't feel like I have any control over my life or true ownership of anything in my life. I feel like I have to ask permission to do anything, and none of my opinions on how something should be done or how something should look matter. If it wasn't for the kids, I'd be gone in a heartbeat. Sometimes, I even contemplate just playing along nicely until they are out on their own, and at least having my 50s and 60s to myself."
—u/Wise_Nectarine_3568
2."The lack of responsibility and obligations. I literally used to pack my bags and leave to live and work in a few different countries just because I felt like experiencing the culture. Now, I feel like I have to be careful and stick with my family. I enjoy my family life, but I want to go adventuring again and explore."
—u/mrinkyface
3."The rush of 'firsts' — that first date rush/nervous feeling. Holding hands for the first time, first kisses, the first time having sex with someone. You get a ton of firsts in marriage, too, that make it all worth it, but those are the ones you'll miss from being single."
—u/DavidJMeowthews41
"Yesssss. This is so hard for some people to understand — it's not that I don't want to be in a relationship. It's just the feeling of firsts is the greatest. Those little adrenaline rushes you get are the best, and cannot be compared to anything else."
—u/Chasing-Amy
4."Not ever having to be accountable for random stuff I do around my own house. It's not like my spouse particularly cares what I do in that sense, but I'd rather no one know I got up at 3 a.m. and was eating ice cream or whatever else."
—u/sexrockandroll
5."Being able to come home from work and not speak a single word."
—u/Dull-Pickle4040
"No, but for real — my husband and I go out of our way to not be in the kitchen when the other one comes home. Something about arriving home to immediate conversation feels like bombardment."
—u/squeakymayotoes
6."Freedom and friends. I feel a 'requirement' to spend most (if not all) of my time at home with my wife and daughter. And it's probably the right thing to do, but I miss being able to just leave and go hang out with friends all the time. Now, I'm lucky if I hang out with a friend once a month. I think my average is once every two months, if not more — it's pretty sad. Also, if you wanna bring your wife and daughter to something, it's not the same. I would be too worried thinking about if my wife is thinking I'm not giving her enough attention, watching our kid, and if my kid is being too annoying around my friends."
—u/Yakkamota
7."Being on my own time. I wouldn't trade my wife for anything, but having to share a vehicle means neither one of us is ever on our own time. Everything is a scheduling conflict and compromise. It's definitely a first-world problem, but I do miss doing whatever I wanted whenever I wanted."
—u/Letter10
8."Having alone time. Like, holy hell, dude: I just want one weekend to be the disgusting, vile, wine-loving bitch that I am."
—u/bennygal16
9."Deciding on what to have for dinner without a second opinion. Most of the time, it's not an issue — we have similar tastes. But occasionally we are craving different flavors."
—u/SelfDerecatingTumor
10."Having a shitload of money usable for any purpose *I* want."
—u/ProbablyABore
11."Now it's not all about me, so there are days when I have to do things I don't want. There are some days when I will stand my ground, but somehow it doesn't feel totally right. Before, for example, I could go out or not, and nobody cared."
—u/oo-----D
12."I miss not having someone worried about me. Where I am, where I'm going, and when I'll be back. Ironically, that's why I like being married."
—u/_joeBone_
13."Knowing exactly what to expect when I put the key in the door after work. Marriage is awesome, but there are some days in my life where a period of nothing is a good thing."
—u/P4S5B60
14."I miss shopping for groceries for just myself. I also miss having snacks last for more than one day — they never last anymore."
—u/Chlovir
15."Not compromising about anything. It gets exhausting to compromise on your end, and then I feel guilty if he compromises on his end. Decision making is also a lot easier on your own."
—u/Low_Departure_5853
16."Talking to other women. I don't even have to date them, but just open conversations where I don't have to think about if what I'm saying may come off as flirting or not. Just being myself and getting to know new women."
—u/Letitbe8522
17."Spending my money however I want. My wife is amazing and never asks me for anything, not even what I'm spending my money on. But I feel really bad to spend 1/4 of my salary on a new video game or half of it on a smartwatch when I have a house and a family to take care of."
—u/ImSynnx
18."Peace and quiet — I need quiet time. My wife and kids need radios, TVs, and phones on high volume at all times. They all talk loud, stomp around like a herd of rhinos, and slam doors."
—u/Worried-Mulberry-968
19."Making a mistake and thinking: 'I won't do that again.' Then it's over, and I go about my day. Now, if I make a mistake, I hear about the mistake and how it affects us, and what I need to do in the future for an hour. Then periodically I'll be reminded of it for the next week."
—u/pyroguy174
20."Having to share everything. Being the youngest kid growing up, I always had to share everything I had. Most of my clothes were hand-me-downs. If we got junk food, then I usually had to share it with my older sister. And we did it without much fuss, as we knew it was a treat every so often. Then I got married — he is a great guy, but has a habit of not asking if something is his or not. So any leftovers I have in the fridge, he will eat, and they have to be very clearly labeled as mine to avoid this."
—u/shadow-foxe
21."Sleeping alone. I need my sleep, and my husband tosses and turns to the point where he pulls the pillows I'm sleeping on out from underneath my head. I like the blankets to be straightened out, and sometimes he moves around so much that I wake up with no blankets on. I know he is doing this stuff in his sleep and not doing it intentionally, but I'm lucky if I can get one or two nights sleeping through the night without being woken up by his restless sleeping."
—u/whydoihave2dothis
22.And finally, "The lack of anxiety around making decisions. I will make weekend plans around what I want to do. I will cook what I want to eat. I will select decorations that please me. I will stay up as late as I want and take showers as long as I want. I will dance around and sing loudly and have my music on. I will have no music and absolute silence. I will starfish on the bed or burrito in the blankets. All my choices will be for *my* happiness, but right now, my choices can/do influence someone else's happiness."
—u/somewhenimpossible
Note: Some submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
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