7 Things I Decluttered After Divorce for a Fresh Start
Going through a divorce is undoubtedly transformative. It's not just about changing your legal connection with someone; it can mean shifting who you spend time with, where you live, and even what you own. For someone like me, who is deeply connected to my environment, it wasn't a surprise that the process of separation also led to some serious decluttering. Here's everything I got rid of in the months after my divorce, including old photos, mementos, and more.
(Most) Wedding Mementos
After my ex and I got married, I held onto everything related to our wedding — from the cake serving set gifted by my stepmom, to cards filled with generic well-wishes, and all those other little keepsakes that seemed to carry meaning. I wanted all of the memories readily available for us and our future kids. But now, I have pared it down to just a few items: my veil, thrifted vases we used in the floral arrangements, copies of speeches from family members, and our vows. That last one might seem like an odd choice, but it's important to me that if our daughter ever wonders, she can see how much love there was between us.
Excess Kitchen Supplies
As an avid home chef, my ex took care of most of our meals, which led to an impressive — though overwhelming — collection of kitchen gadgets. After our split, I was more than ready to simplify. Cooking has never been my forte, and while the gadgets were technically useful, they made me feel anxious rather than inspired. I couldn't handle the extra clutter when I was already juggling so much.
Our Bed
My ex and I moved in together immediately after college, meaning we shared the same bed for seven years. After our separation, I couldn't bring myself to keep it — though I tried, as furniture can be so expensive. It had become more than just a bed — it was a symbol of the emotional and physical intimacy we'd shared. I didn't fully realize just how much the presence of that bed weighed on me until it was gone. Once I got rid of it, I noticed a difference almost immediately: My sleep improved, which confirmed I wasn't being dramatic about its emotional impact after all.
Photos of Us
Despite our split, my ex and I share a daughter, so I didn't go as far as shredding all our photos or deleting digital files. She deserves to have access to those memories should she want them. What I did do, however, was get rid of anything framed or on display. As time passed and our daughter got older, I kept a few photos of the three of us and of her with her dad around my home. It's one small way we can continue to show her that, while our family dynamic has changed, we are still a loving and united unit.
Decor We Compromised On
I've always had a very specific aesthetic, so it was (admittedly) frustrating when my ex and I disagreed on home decor. When I moved out, I donated everything we had met each other halfway on. In a way, it became a physical reminder of compromises I'd made — and not just for the sake of home decor. Getting rid of these items cleared up space for pieces that I actually found beautiful and meaningful. It was surprisingly empowering to create a space that truly reflected who I am.
Clothes He Liked
I never bought clothes solely based on my ex's preferences, but I did gravitate toward certain items he liked for special occasions or date nights. After our divorce, those pieces lost their appeal. I wanted my closet to be filled only with things I loved, not items that were a reminder of someone else's taste. It felt freeing to shed that extra layer of connection.
Anything 'Extra'
The chaos of divorce led me to embrace a sort of 'if it doesn't serve me, it's gone' mindset. If something wasn't useful or didn't spark joy, it was out the door. This is probably an effective way to declutter in any circumstance, but for me, the act of purging felt incredibly necessary. Despite thinking of myself as relatively minimalist before, this process left me with less stuff than ever — and during such a difficult time, that was a huge relief.
Further Reading
We Used Our New 'Room Plan' Tool to Give This Living Room 3 Distinct Styles — See How, Then Try It Yourself
The Design Changemakers to Know in 2025
Create Your Own 3D Room Plan with Our New Tool
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