
Thomas Tuchel is playing a dangerous game - Team Bellingham do not take kindly to any sleight on the star at the centre of their universe, writes CRAIG HOPE
As Thomas Tuchel excitedly waved his arms in the air and bellowed, 'Senegal, Senegal', recreating the joy of England 's victors, you knew what was to follow. He lowered his limbs and dropped his shoulders like a puppet whose strings had been cut. Now he was mirroring his England team.
'Their players came into the dressing room, it was next to my changing room, screaming 'Senegal!',' began the England boss. 'The next one came, 'Senegal!'. Hitting on boxes and whatever. It was not offensive, it was nice to see what it means to them.
'I asked myself, for us as a group, how would we have celebrated if we had beaten them 3-1? Would player after player and the coach go in the dressing room screaming, 'England!'? Would the players jump up and down? Or would we all say, 'Hey guys, it's a friendly match, this is what we expect from us'? I think that's the answer. We would have done that, 'Calm down, it's just a friendly'.
'It shows me what it means to them, and also an excitement and joy to celebrate this victory. We are not there at the moment. We expect a lot from us. I'm missing a little bit of the excitement and laughter and the joy. I see it in training, but in general? No.'
Tuchel was standing beneath a steel staircase in the shadow of the City Ground. He may have thought he was inheriting a team halfway up that flight of steps, but in just a few months it feels like they have tumbled back to the bottom. It was a heavy landing in Nottingham.
His efforts to lift his players during a remarkable radio interview less than 24 hours later were well intended, but revealing that his mother finds Jude Bellingham 's on-field behaviour 'repulsive' could yet backfire, given Team Bellingham do not take kindly to any sleight on the star at the centre of their universe.
Tuchel needs Bellingham if England are to win the World Cup next summer, and he admitted as much during his talkSPORT exchange with host Adrian Durham and former Three Lions defender Stuart Pearce. But this, of course, is assuming they get to North America.
'It's not coming home,' sang some Senegalese journalists on Tuesday. The more pressing matter is leaving home in the first place. Why are we so sure England will make the finals? At the risk of sounding like Kevin Keegan - appropriate, though, given his mid-90s rant mentioned Nottingham Forest - England have still got to go to Albania, Latvia and Serbia and get something this autumn. They would love it if they beat us.
So, Thomas, is it dangerous to believe you're already qualified?
'One hundred per cent,' said the man contracted to win the World Cup, not simply get us there. 'This is the perception because we are competitive, we are in tournaments, we qualify. I'm still 100 per cent convinced that we qualify and win our group. There is no doubt and there will never be a doubt. But if I see the pure joy of Senegal, and they score, the whole bench runs, it feels almost like we are knocked out of a tournament.'
The shirt weights heavy again?
'I'm not so sure what that means,' he said. 'Maybe our own expectation towards us and how we approach games is also heavy on us at the moment.'
External pressure, internal anxiety. It's little wonder playing for England right now looks as uncomfortable as being trapped inside a cooker. This is no fun, for anyone.
Gareth Southgate recognised as much in 2016 and changed the culture of the England team and its supporters. On Tuesday, there were smatterings of boos when the names of some players were read out, presumably motivated by Midlands rivalry or previous skirmishes.
Southgate stopped that, at least for a golden period between 2018 and 2022. You cheered, he said, for the boys from Leicester, Liverpool and Tottenham. You cheered the manager from Crawley, too.
In the play Dear England at the National Theatre, charting the national team's journey under Southgate, there is a scene in which the head coach approaches psychologist Pippa Grange to work with his squad. What does he want from her, she asks.
'I'd settle, right now, for the team feeling better,' he says. 'They're not in good way. The pressure they face, they're not handling it. I don't want any of these young men to go through what I did.'
Southgate, Wayne Rooney, Gary Neville, Steven Gerrard, David Beckham, they have all spoken about the quiet trauma of playing for their country.
Is that where we are again? Take England's best player, Bellingham, and it's fair to call him that given he starts for Real Madrid every week. He has become a poster boy for moodiness, a brand ambassador for adult adolescence, as Tuchel's radio interview alluded to.
But it's all so needless - Bellingham has every reason to be England's Pied Piper. The problem is, in Jude's world, everyone dances to his tune. That much was evident at the Euros last summer.
Jordan Henderson has been brought in by Tuchel to be Bellingham's chaperone. But that has side-effects. What do the others think of a team-mate who is cast as both teacher and teacher's pet? Henderson is operating as a minister without portfolio, given he is likely to have little responsibility on the field. Just be done with it and make him a coach, or the heir to Pippa Grange.
For Tuchel is learning more about who not to pick than he is who warrants selection. Guaranteed starters? Jordan Pickford, Declan Rice, Bellingham and Harry Kane, but some of those are because of pedigree, not performance.
Twelve months out from a World Cup we're no longer certain England will be at, and this is all starting to feel very nostalgic - boos, blunders and bafflement.
'The job looks always easy from the outside,' said Tuchel, in his final address from the outdoor stairwell. 'There are always millions of football coaches who have an answer and better ideas. I'm far from perfect. It is a big challenge, I knew this before. I think it's very important now we stay calm and stay together.
'I feel this togetherness between the players and the staff. It's very important we remind ourselves this is needed if we want to get better.'
For perhaps the first time, Thomas Tuchel looked and sounded like an England manager, albeit one who pre-dated Southgate. A German, though, should not be scarred by our historical sorrow. He is here to shape the future. He is here to wave his arms about England. Not Senegal.
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