How Rolling Stones could be Glastonbury's Patchwork as they record 25th album
Hear me out.
After their last No.1 album, Hackney Diamonds, dropped in 2023 with rave reviews and the success of their single Angry, members Mick Jagger, Keith Richards and Ronnie Wood are said to be working on the new record with current drummer Steve Jordan.
'Originally, the plan was for them to bring their huge US tour to the UK and Europe this summer, but promoters couldn't get the dates to work, a source told The Sun.
This huge news comes as Glastonbury dropped its full line-up for this year, with a number of secret sets billed.
While some of these mystery slots are earmarked with TBA, there is one primetime Pyramid Stage slot currently occupied by a non-existant band called Patchwork.
Most eyes are on Pulp at the moment, with Glastonbury tipsters Secretglasto convinced the 90s rockers are Patchwork, just as the Foo Fighters were made-up name The ChurnUps in 2023.
However, with talks of tour plans being scrapped due to dates not being able to work and a new album said to be on the way, why could it not be the Rolling Stones?
Sir Rod Stewart has already confirmed Rolling Stones member Ronnie Wood will be at the festival, making a surprise appearance in his Sunday afternoon set, so he's in situ.
But here's the big clue: Rolling Stones is actually a Patchwork pattern, which perhaps seems less tenuous than Pulp member Candida Doyle recently saying she likes doing patchwork on tour.
Also, what band in the history of the world has a more recognisable band patch, than the Rolling Stones' hot lips logo?
Plus, the late Rolling Stones member Charlie Watts was known for his love of tailoring, having owned over 200 suits, so the Patchwork moniker could be a nod to him. It would make sense, as he was totally different in his tailored three-piece suits, against the other Stones' rock and roll attire.
The first and only time the Rolling Stones have performed at Glastonbury came in 2013, when they headlined the Pyramid Stage with Watts, before his death in 2021.
According to LitHub, Sunspel, the British clothing manufacturer, designed a T-shirt that was easier for Charlie to play in due to the insertion of an extra side panel, allowing for two seams down the side instead of one.
He was said to be so happy with it that the entire band wore the design at the Glastonbury Festival in 2013.
In case we didn't need any more clues, in the 1960s – when the Rolling Stones were formed – patchwork patterns saw a huge revival with the emergance of the hippy culture.
All an innocent coincidence? We're not so convinced… Time will tell.
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