Woman Can't Stop Thinking About a Man She Met 10 Years Ago — Even Though Their Relationship Was ‘Very Surface Level'

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4 days ago

"Lately, I can't seem to get him out of my mind," the woman wrote on a community forumNEED TO KNOW
A woman shared on a community forum that she can't stop thinking about a man she met 10 years ago, even though their relationship was "very surface level"
"Lately, I can't seem to get him out of my mind. I imagine us running into each other and what we would say, what would happen," she wrote
She said she even believes she "might be in love" with the man, and wonders if he feels the sameA woman says she can't stop thinking about a man from her past, despite "barely" knowing him. She even thinks she "might be in love" with him — and wonders if he feels the same.
She shared her story in a post on the U.K.-based community forum Mumsnet, beginning by explaining that she and the man had "a thing right at the start" of first meeting each other 10 years ago. While she wouldn't specify what happened, she said, "in short I rejected his advances."
"We became casual acquaintances, seeing each other on a sort of necessary basis (work-related)," she noted. "I saw him as a friend. Even though the relationship was very surface level."
Then, the two had a falling-out.
"We didn't even speak to each other — it was just the way he looked at me and the way I left," she said of the interaction. "The next time I saw him, I acted normal and things were ok."
She continued: "I moved away and just didn't contact him again, there being no need now that we were not connected via work. I also was feeling that he was never going to take things forward with me."
Over the years, she said, she couldn't help but think of him — but she always "pushed the feelings away, believing he did not feel the same way."
The man eventually "settled down" and had two children. "I heard this through a friend, he is not traceable on social media. I do not know if the relationship with the mother lasted or not," she noted.
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Now, the woman said she finds herself wondering what might have been.
"Lately, I can't seem to get him out of my mind. I imagine us running into each other and what we would say, what would happen," she wrote, asking fellow Mumsnet users, "Am I crazy for feeling this way?"
She also questioned, "Does he feel the same way — how can it be possible for this to happen as a one-sided thing?"
The woman concluded her post — which she titled, "I think I might be in love with someone I barely knew 10 years ago" — by admitting that the whole situation has her feeling "like an idiot."
In the comments section, readers were quick to bring the woman back down to Earth.
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"It's a fantasy of [what] you'd want it to be. You're in love with the idea of him," one person wrote, urging the poster to "stop analyzing and let it go."
Another agreed, commenting, "It sounds like you are lonely and have romanticized the memory."
Someone else gently suggested that the man is unlikely to have reciprocal feelings after all this time.
"With the ultimate kindness and respect, he has probably never thought about you again. He has gone on to have his life, settled down with a partner and had a few kids," they wrote.
The same person continued: "We all have moments of rose-tinted specs and 'what could have beens,' so don't feel like an idiot for the dreaming, lots of us have done it. But do try and haul yourself back to reality, and put him out of your mind, and try and move on. Unrequited love is a waste of your space and time."
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