Influencer speaks out on violent attack and growing online abuse
Ahead of a special television programme tonight, Prime Time has published a series of articles about concerns regarding the impact of online influencers and content which promote negative or distorted forms of masculinity.
Here, podcaster Charleen Murphy speaks about her experience in which a man who had commented constantly on her social media accounts attacked her in person.
On 10 February 2023, influencer Charleen Murphy was having dinner with a friend in a hotel restaurant in Dublin.
The two were having a drink, waiting on their meals. As was normal for her at the time, she posted a photo on Instagram and tagged her location.
A short while later, a man entered the restaurant.
"I just felt this blow to the back of my head," Ms Murphy told Prime Time. "My head basically went so full force forward into my glass that the glass completely shattered and smashed and I got a cut in my hairline."
Ms Murphy said she recognised the man immediately as someone who had been constantly messaging her on social media.
"I looked to my left and I could see him standing there. Straight away, I knew who it was… He had been messaging me in the past online," she told Prime Time.
"I could feel this warmth on my face - the blood rushing down - but I didn't realise what that was. My friend said: 'We need to call an ambulance.'"
Ms Murphy has made a career from sharing her life online, posting lifestyle content across her Instagram and TikTok accounts, which have a combined following of almost 600,000.
She spoke to Prime Time as part of a programme examining how certain types of online content may be shaping Irish teenagers' views on gender roles, masculinity, and fuelling misogyny.
Ms Murphy went to St James's Hospital in Dublin and received stitches for the cut on her head.
Her attacker walked out of the restaurant and sent Ms Murphy a message asking 'how's the head?' Hours later, he presented himself to gardaí.
At his sentencing, the judge in the case described the attack as "unprovoked, unwarranted and terrible" and said "Ms Murphy had no way of protecting herself as she was hit from behind".
She also added that he had spoken about Ms Murphy in "utter derogatory terms, a female who had done nothing to him".
Since the attack, Ms Murphy has changed how she shares her life.
"If I'm in a restaurant or on holiday anywhere, if I'm posting, I've already actually gone from there. I'll put it up as if it's the moment, just to keep the continuity. But I won't actually be there anymore. You just don't know who's watching."
Ms Murphy also hosts a podcast, which includes live recordings with ticketed audiences in well-known venues.
"I've had to get security, just to feel safe and have that extra layer of security. That obviously comes at a cost. It's not cheap."
She says her efforts to stay safe have became the target of criticism, with people leaving comments saying things like "Who does she think she is?"
"They condemned me for my own personal safety. I'm trying to be safe… I'd rather not do it. I'd rather not pay that money. You're damned if you do, damned if you don't."
Online abuse has become a growing part of her daily life, Ms Murphy says.
"Probably the most common one would be 'slut', which is mad that that's a common word thrown around online in such an open space. 'Slapper, whore, fat'."
"They range from really small to something really like... 'wow' when you're reading it."
She remembers the first time she got an onslaught of abuse, when a tweet of hers went viral. The now 26-year-old said she was young at the time and it had a serious impact on her.
"I was getting all sorts of 'slut, who does she think she is', 'the biggest loser on the internet'. I was quite young at the time. I remember just breaking down."
"I'm sure, subconsciously, it affects me even more than I think."
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Some of the most disturbing messages come when she speaks out.
"When I came out with the story [of being attacked] that time, people said: 'You're not a real victim because it was only this or only that.' They downplay your pain or trauma," she said.
"You don't have to have something worse than someone else to still have gone through something bad."
Ms Murphy says that often people think she should expect abuse because she shares her life online.
"People say it comes with the job. And obviously, people are allowed to give their own opinion - it's free speech. But it doesn't make it any nicer or easier. And it doesn't mean they should."
Ms Murphy says there needs to be more policing online and that she monitors her own comments. "It's usually a fake account. Usually a man. But sometimes it's their own account and they just have no shame."
"Men try to flirt by replying to stories. If you don't reply, it's like, 'Well, you're a slut.' They say something nasty because you didn't give them attention."
Increasingly, Ms Murphy says abusive comments are coming from younger users.
"It's happening much younger. People have these words and this information so young. Their brains are being shaped by it all. It's scary. I'm scared for the younger generation."
Although Ms Murphy says she can't identify the root cause for the rise in abusive comments, she does see a wider shift in what young people are exposed to.
"I feel like maybe the content online is more toxic. There's a lot more toxic masculinity out there."
"And there's a lot more women coming forward with their stories. I don't know, is it happening more because of that? Or are people just more open to sharing?"
Ms Murphy says people underestimate the impact of what they post.
"People think it's so minor and so small - it's just a comment. You can brush it off. But kids are reading that. And that's saying to them, 'It's okay for me to post this too.'"
"All the little things turn into the big things. They build up. And it can lead to something like an attack or a stalker or anything. It's scary."
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