5 Back To School Routines For Working Parents

Forbes

3 days ago

For working parents, back to school can be both a relief and also a burden. You'll miss the slow days of summer and you look forward to the comfort of regular schedules, but the demands can feel overwhelming.
With the responsibilities of back to school, establishing routines can be the perfect way to reduce stress and make the process easier for both you and your kids.
Build a Back-to-School Routine that Works
So how can working parents build a back-to-school routine that makes sense for their family?
One of the best ways to establish your routine is to start early. In fact, 89% of parents swear by this approach, according to a survey from Life360. Before the start of the school year, establish earlier bedtimes and wake up times, set a routine for mealtimes and protect periods for regular reading that will turn into periods for homework.
In addition, communicate with your boss or your team in case your schedule at work will need to shift. And ensure you're caught up on summer-time projects so you can hit the ground running for the school year.
The reason routines are helpful is that they embed habits and allow for 'cognitive offloading.' When you do something the same way again and again, you don't have to think about it each time and it just starts to happen automatically.
For back to school, make a list of the tasks that need to occur regularly, determine the times that will be best for each, and then block periods for each of them.
For example, you know you'll need to get the kids up each morning, check your email for the day, make lunches, choose outfits, get homework done and read bedtime stories. In this case, you might determine that you'll make lunches every night as you're also making dinner so they're ready the night before, and you'll lay out outfits each night as well. You'll also get up an extra 10 minutes early, so you have time to check what's coming up at work. And you'll block time after school for 30 minutes of playtime followed by homework time and bedtime.
Do what works best for you, but make plans, block time and monitor outcomes so you can continuously improve your routines.
As you're establishing habits, also determine who can help. Reach out to your neighbor and make plans to share the driving for after-school pick up. Create a snack schedule for the parents who will take the granola bars and water to football practices. Agree with your partner that you'll make lunches on odd-numbered days and they'll make lunches on even-numbered days.
Also consider the support you may need at work. Connect with your teammates to determine ways you can support each other with shared responsibilities. Look ahead to your regular meetings and collaborate with a colleague to update each other in case either of you will need to miss meetings because of school demands.
Another unexpected but powerful way to establish routines is to involve kids in the process. Include them in obtaining school supplies, selecting their outfits, setting clothes out the night before and planning for the time they'll protect for homework.
When children are involved, it can help relieve responsibility but also create a sense of agency for children which contributes to their esteem and confidence. According to a survey by Talker Research, 62% of parents let their children choose clothing and select school supplies. And 56% involve their kids in choosing what extracurriculars they'll pursue.
Use visual tools and time management aids. Sometimes we think of using these for younger children, but ironically, they can be helpful at any age.
Create a chart for completing homework or make a paper chain for the number of days before school starts. Keep your calendar in a prominent location with key dates marked on it, including your work trip, your big project and your daughter's violin recital.
Especially when you're facing a lot of stress, making things tangible and visible can provide a sense of control and empowerment.
Another way to manage your routines is to be sure and talk things through with your partner, friends and your kids. Sometimes, the focus during back-to-school can be all about logistics and schedules but be sure you stay connected with others and with your children.
If you're stressed about being stressed and running in all directions to do all the things, you can undermine your own sense of calm. Instead, if you can share your concerns with trusted adults and talk openly with your children about their worries, it can enhance your feelings of connection and reduce the stress you're feeling.
Feeling personally supported and also offering empathy to others (including your kids) are strongly correlated with reduced stress. You'll still be facing all the demands, but you'll have a greater sense of wellbeing as you do.
Why Back to School Is Stressful
But why are routines important in the first place and where does the stress arise? Is it legit that parents feel so stressed? How does the transition from summer break to school impact working parents? And where do the difficulties or obstacles arise?
It's helpful to just understand and validate what the challenges are. They fall into a few key areas:
The takeaway message? There's a lot to manage, and good reasons to be stressed for working moms and dads. But you're not alone. In fact, for 44% of parents, back-to-school season is the most stressful time of the year, even more than birthdays or holidays, according to Life360.
Give yourself permission to feel the pressure, take a deep breath and move forward one step at a time.
Create Positive Back-to-School Experiences
If you're able to manage through the pressure of back to school and stay calm, your kids will be able to stay more calm as well. Your children are learning from how you handle work and life. Of course you'll have ups and downs and there will be periods with more pressure, as well as periods of less challenge along the way.
Remind yourself that you're capable and that this is a season of life that you're in. Back to school is busy, but it can also be rewarding. You can expand your own resilience and deepen relationships with your children as they (and you!) are developing through each school year.