Sony issues update on PS6 following reports release date could be ‘sooner' than we thought
And gamers can't wait to get their hands on the new exciting console.
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The Sun revealed that court documents from Microsoft, which owns Xbox, previously revealed that the tech giant was expecting a 2028 launch for next-gen consoles.
That included its own top-secret Xbox successor as well as Sony 's unnamed next-gen PlayStation.
But countering that was a new report from Insider Gaming that suggested an upcoming Blade Runner game due for 2027 has been cancelled.
The report noted that the game was due to land on next-gen consoles that are yet to be released.
This unannounced game was reportedly due to be called Blade Runner: Time To Leave.
It entered pre-production in September 2024 with a budget of around £33 million / $45 million.
But the game has supposedly been canned by the Guildford, UK-based studio.
However, it was a major hint that the PS6 might land in 2027 rather than 2028.
Now, Sony Interactive Entertainment's new president and CEO, Hideaki Nishino, was asked during a meeting about the future of PlayStation console hardware, and whether it could be superseded by cloud gaming.
He said: 'Cloud streaming is progressing well from a technical standpoint, as we have demonstrated with [our] offerings, but end-to-end network stability is not in our control.
Watch trailer for free Samurai game for PlayStation fans in May 2025
'And the higher cost per playtime compared to the traditional console model remains a challenge.
'Cloud gaming is increasingly providing an additional option for players to access content,
"But our belief is that the majority of players continue to want to experience gaming through local execution without dependency on network conditions.
"And PS5 and PS5 Pro have validated this thesis, I believe," reports Video Games Chronicle.
Sony PlayStation Release Dates
Here's a quick history of the main models released.
Sony PlayStation:
Japan – December 3, 1994
North America – September 9, 1995
Europe – September 29, 1995
Sony PlayStation 2:
Japan – March 4, 2000
North America – October 26, 2000
Europe – November 24, 2000
Sony PlayStation 3:
Japan – November 11, 2006
North America – November 17, 2006
Europe – March 23, 2007
Sony PlayStation 4:
North America – November 15, 2013
Europe – November 29, 2013
Japan – February 22, 2014
Sony PlayStation 5:
Japan – November 12, 2020
North America – November 12, 2020
Europe – November 12, 2020
The CEO continued to explain how Sony's console business has evolved into a 'multi-faceted platform', with a significant portion of its 124 million monthly active users still playing on PlayStation 4.
'We now have a large ecosystem of highly engaged players across both the PlayStation 5 and the PlayStation 4 generations.
"So naturally, therefore, there's a huge interest in our next generation console strategy,' he said.
'While we cannot share further details at this stage, the future of the platform is top of mind.
"We are committed to exploring a new and enhanced way for players to engage with our content and services.'
SVP of finance and corporate development, Lynn Azar, was then asked if Sony expects to see higher profits in the year its next console launches, like it has before.
Azar emphasized that Sony's players are now engaged across multiple platforms, including PS4, PS5 and PC.
And explained that the vast majority of its revenue now comes from subscriptions and microtransactions, which should provide protection during any future platform migration.
She added: 'PS5 represents our most engaged players, with the highest spend per player versus prior generations.
"Our PS4 players as well are still active and spending as well.
'So, by providing players with increasing options of how to access the platform, we're able to better target the different play patterns and monetization profiles of different customer segments.
"And as we continue to drive a multi-generational ecosystem into the future, we'll provide new ways for players to access the platform and experience our content and services.'
WHAT DO WE KNOW ABOUT THE PS6 LAUNCH WINDOW?
Sony hasn't explicitly confirmed a launch timeline for the PS6 but the company has released plenty of consoles in the past, giving us some useful data.
Just last year, we asked AI to predict the PS6 release date, based on Sony's PlayStation release history.
And it came up with Thursday, November 11, 2027 – fitting in with this latest leak.
Here's a list of previous PlayStation release dates, as well as the days of the week that those consoles launched on:
PlayStation – Saturday, December 3, 1994 (1st Saturday)
PS One – Friday, July 7, 2000 (1st Friday)
PlayStation 2 – Saturday, March 4, 2000 (1st Saturday)
PS2 Slimline – Friday, October 29, 2004 (5th Friday)
PlayStation 3 – Saturday, November 11, 2006 (2nd Saturday)
PS3 Slim – Thursday, August 27, 2009 (4th Thursday)
PS3 Super Slim – Tuesday, September 25, 2012 (4th Tuesday)
PlayStation 4 – Friday, November 15, 2013 (3rd Friday)
PS4 Slim – Thursday, September 15, 2016 (3rd Thursday)
PS4 Pro – Thursday, November 10, 2016 (2nd Thursday)
PlayStation 5 – Thursday, November 12, 2020 (2nd Thursday)
PS5 Slim – Friday, November 10, 2023 (2nd Friday)
PS5 Pro – Thursday, November 7, 2024 (1st Thursday)
That would suggest that Sony would work towards a 2027 launch.
November is usually favoured by Sony for PlayStation launches, especially in recent years.
That means the console is out just in time for Christmas and the Black Friday spending season.
But of course, it's all guesswork - so watch this space.
In the meantime, PlayStation owners are having to pay extra for consoles after a recent PS5 price hike.
And a shooter game loved by 10million is closing in days – as fans are warned they'll have to pay for an upgrade to keep playing.
Plus, Sony has announced that it will be issuing refunds over a gaming blunder.
The gaming giant had to issue an apology after gamers experienced significant problems with one if its new releases.
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The Sun
21 minutes ago
- The Sun
Flesh hung like ribbons from bones…ghostly figures collapsed, never to rise – inside horrors of WW2 atomic bomb
IT was the day that changed the world for ever – when the first atomic bomb brought Armageddon to Japan. Oscar-winning 2023 film Oppenheimer tells how the world's most destructive weapon was created. But it does not show the A-bomb being used in action. 9 9 9 Next week marks 80 years since scientist Robert Oppenheimer 's nuclear bombs obliterated two Japanese cities, ending World War Two. Incredibly, the weapon that could destroy all life has since brought eight decades of peace, through fear of mutual destruction. Here, minute by minute, we detail the story movie viewers did not see – of how US President Harry Truman approved the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki in August 1945, before Japan's Emperor Hirohito surrendered six days later. MONDAY AUG 6, 1945 1.30am (Japan), 2.30am local time: Nine days after US President Harry Truman had warned Japan to surrender or face 'prompt and utter destruction', a US Boeing B-29 Superfortress bomber emerges from a top-secret compound at the world's busiest airbase. Lieut-Col Paul Tibbets, 29, is at the controls of the plane, named Enola Gay after his 57-year-old mother, on the Pacific island of Tinian, 1,500 miles from the Japanese mainland. In the hold is only one warhead — a bomb so deadly that it could not be armed in advance in case the plane crashed on the runway, wiping the US base off the face of the Earth. The device, nicknamed Little Boy, is 10ft long and 28inches in diameter and has the explosive force of 20,000 tonnes of TNT. Physicist Harold Agnew, who would be flying alongside to monitor the explosion, confessed later: 'That bomb was completely unsafe. If they'd crashed, anything could have happened.' 1.40am: Photographers and film crews surround the Enola Gay, which is lit up by spotlights as her ten-man crew pose for photos. Theodore 'Dutch' Van Kirk, who was on his 59th mission, recalled: 'There were all these people — photographers, newspapermen — everywhere. It looked like a Hollywood premiere.' 1.45am: Heavily overloaded with the five-tonne bomb on board, Enola Gay rumbles down the 1.6mile runway and takes off with 200ft to spare. Inside the eerie abandoned Los Alamos lab where Oppenheimer created the weapon that could wipe out the world Behind are two more planes with nicknames — The Great Artiste, carrying scientific instruments to record the blast, and Necessary Evil, with a camera crew on board to film the explosion and damage. Ahead lies a six-hour flight in a moonless sky. 2.20am: Also on board Enola Gay is US Navy captain William 'Deke' Parsons, 43, who had witnessed the horror of Oppenheimer's atomic test in the New Mexico desert and described it as 'the hottest and brightest thing since the creation'. Parsons, along with electronics specialist Morris Jeppson, 23, wriggle into the crammed bomb bay to carry out the 11-step process of arming Little Boy. Working by flashlight for 15 minutes, they insert a fuse and four bags of cordite gunpowder that will detonate the bomb, which contains 64kg of highly enriched uranium. 4.15am: Van Kirk would recall: 'That morning, the sunrise was the most beautiful I'd ever seen.' 6.25am: Jeppson returns to the bay to make final adjustments. Little Boy is now fully armed. 7.09am: Straight Flush, one of three US weather reconnaissance bombers sent to check out three possible cities to attack, is seen over Hiroshima, home to 245,000 people. On the ground, Hiroshima's citizens have heard a rumour that the Americans were saving something for their city because, for the last two months, US planes had been dropping harmless orange bombs, the same size as Little Boy. Oppenheimer had warned that the bomb's shockwave could crush his plane like a giant hand swatting an ant. 7.30am: Over the intercom, Tibbets announces: ' It's Hiroshima.' Co-pilot Captain Robert Lewis, 27, writes in his report: 'There will be a short intermission while we bomb our target.' 8.10am: Flying at 285mph, Enola Gay reaches 31,000ft. Her crew, now wearing flak jackets and welder's goggles, search for their aiming point, the T-shaped Aioi Bridge in Hiroshima city centre. Akihiro Takahashi, 14, is in the playground of a high school, watching the bomber overhead. 8.15am +16seconds: An alarm sounds as Bombardier Major Thomas Ferebee releases Little Boy, which nosedives towards the earth. Engines screaming, Tibbets turns Enola Gay into a steep diving turn of exactly 159 degrees. Oppenheimer had warned that the bomb's shockwave could crush his plane like a giant hand swatting an ant. 8.16am +2seconds: Little Boy explodes at 1,890ft above the ground, creating a fireball of 10,000F — the same as the surface of the sun. The explosion rips through Hiroshima's Communications Hospital. Of 150 doctors in the city, 65 are already dead and most of the rest are wounded. Some 1,654 of 1,780 nurses are also killed or too hurt to work. At the Red Cross Hospital, the city's biggest, only six doctors out of 30 are fit to function. One of them is surgeon Dr Terufumi Sasaki, who is trying to deal with at least 10,000 wounded who descend on the hospital, which has just 600 beds. Van Kirk recalls: 'Everybody was waiting for that bomb to go off because there was a real possibility it was going to be a dud.' Despite wearing goggles, the explosion 'was like a photographer's flash going off in your face'. Tail gunner, George 'Bob' Caron screams: 'Here it comes!' Moments later, the shockwave hits them, followed by a huge radioactive cloud that can be seen from 400 miles away. 9 8.17am: As Enola Gay levels off, Tibbets tells his crew: 'Fellows, you have just dropped the first atomic bomb in history. ' The B-29's crew look for Hiroshima. Van Kirk says later: 'You couldn't see it. It was covered in smoke, dust, debris. 'And coming out of it was that mushroom cloud.' Lewis writes in his log: 'Just how many did we kill? My God, what have we done?' More than 100,000 people in Hiroshima die in an instant. Another 40,000 would succumb to their injuries, while thousands more would suffer death by radiation poisoning. In the devastated city centre, 8,000 children aged 12 and 13, helping clear firebreaks to limit damage from air raids, are vapourised as the fireball engulfs the wooden buildings. Eiko Taoka, 21, is on a tram clutching her year-old son as she hears a screaming noise and the sky goes black. Fragments of glass suddenly appear in the baby's head. He looks up at his mother and smiles. That smile will haunt Eiko for the rest of her life. Her little boy will live for three more weeks. Akihiro Takahashi is blown across the playground, his skin on fire. He staggers to the Ota River to cool his burns, jumping into the water just as the huge wall of flame engulfs the city. 10am: Faced with such devastation, Lewis believes the Japanese will have surrendered by the time Enola Gay lands back at Tinian. He signs off his log: 'Everyone got a few catnaps.' Akihiro climbs out of the Ota River and finds a school friend, Tokujiro Hatta, who has burnt feet and his muscles are exposed beneath peeled skin. They head slowly home with Tokujiro crawling on his knees and elbows and leaning on Akihiro as he walks on his heels. Thousands of naked, badly burnt people are also shuffling out of the city. Setsuko Nakamura, 13, would recall: 'Some had eyeballs hanging out of their sockets. Strips of flesh hung like ribbons from their bones. 'Often, these ghostly figures would collapse in heaps, never to rise again. With a few surviving classmates, I joined the procession, carefully stepping over the dead and dying.' 1.58pm: Enola Gay lands back on Tinian 12 hours and 13 minutes after take-off. In Hiroshima Akihiro spots his great-aunt and uncle walking towards them. He said it was like 'seeing the Buddha in the depths of hell'. Akihiro would survive after months in hospital, but his friend Tokujiro died. In 1980, Akihiro met Enola Gay's pilot Paul Tibbets in Washington DC. 3.05pm: Tibbets is first out of Enola Gay. Waiting for him are 100 men, including General Carl Spaatz, commander of US Strategic Air Forces in the Pacific, who pins the Distinguished Service Cross on Tibbets's chest. 9 9 9 4.20pm: Enola Gay's crew undergo radiation tests plus examinations to see if their eyes have been damaged. All pass. 10pm: A party is held on Tinian, while Captain Parsons, Enola Gay's weapons expert, signs documents confirming Little Boy was deployed. Meanwhile, at the Red Cross Hospital in Hiroshima, worn out and wearing glasses taken from a wounded nurse after his specs were lost in the explosion, Dr Sasaki wanders the corridors, binding up the worst wounds. WHEN the Americans do not hear any sign of surrender from Japan, they decide a second, bigger, atomic bomb is needed. This explosive, 'Fat Man', is 40 per cent more powerful than Little Boy. With no electricity, he works by the light of fires still burning outside and candles held by the ten remaining nurses. Patients are dying in their hundreds. The stench of death is overwhelming. 11.55am Eastern War Time: President Truman is on USS Augusta, heading home from the Potsdam Conference in Germany where, with British PM Winston Churchill and Joseph Stalin, he had warned Japan of the consequences of failure to surrender. He is handed an urgent War Department message: 'Hiroshima was bombed at 7.15pm Washington time August 5 . . . results clear cut, successful in all respects.' Truman shouts: 'This is the greatest thing in history!' The crew cheer and bang their lunch tables. One sailor says: 'Mr President, I guess that means I'll get home sooner now.' TUESDAY, AUGUST 7 WHEN the Americans do not hear any sign of surrender from Japan, they decide a second, bigger, atomic bomb is needed. This explosive, 'Fat Man', is 40 per cent more powerful than Little Boy, with a core made of plutonium rather than uranium. THURSDAY, AUGUST 9 2.47am (Japan time): US Air Force B-29 bomber Bockscar, piloted by Major Charles Sweeney, who had been on the Hiroshima mission, sets off from Tinian. The target is the city of Kokura in Japan's west — with Nagasaki as a back-up in case of bad weather. 8.44am: Sweeney's crew arrives above Kokura and finds the city covered in fog. They attempt three bomb runs, but cancel each one at the last moment because they cannot see anything below. 10.32am: After 'animated discussions', the crew decides to fly on to the secondary target, Nagasaki, 95 miles south. Nagasaki was only added to the list because US Secretary of War, Henry Stimson, had happy memories of staying 19 years earlier in Kyoto, the original No1 target. Nagasaki was added instead after Stimson insisted: 'I don't want Kyoto bombed.' 10.58am: Arriving at Nagasaki, Bockscar only has enough fuel for one pass over the bustling city, which is also covered in fog. 11am +50seconds: Bombardier Captain Kermit Beahan yells: 'I see a hole!' But the gap in the cloud is above an area several miles away from the point they had planned to drop the bomb. 11.01am +13seconds: Beahan shouts: 'Bombs away!' and releases the most powerful atomic bomb ever used in warfare. 11.02am: Fat Man detonates 1,650ft above the harbour city. Sweeney later says this bomb seems 'more intense, more angry' than the one he watched fall on Hiroshima. Everyone within one mile of ground zero is vaporised — at least 40,000 people die instantly. About 30,000 more will rapidly die from burns and injuries. Despite Fat Man being more powerful than the Hiroshima weapon — with a core temperature of up to 1.8million F — the death toll is far less. That is because this bomb falls in a valley, and the sides contain some of its spread. Just outside the vaporisation zone, British prisoner of war Geoffrey Sherring is trying to light a cigarette when 'a very, very brilliant and powerful light' fills the sky, 'completely eclipsing the sun'. He will later recall: 'It was the colour of a welding flash, a blue, mostly ultraviolet flash.' Geoffrey then feels the 'thundering, rolling, shaking' of the bomb's shockwave. This brings down a wall in the camp, which crushes fellow prisoner Corporal Ronald Shaw. The 25-year-old, from Edmonton, North London, is the first British person to be killed in an atomic bombing. 11.06am: Bockscar's crew decides to head to the US air base at Okinawa because they do not have enough fuel to reach Tinian. 11.30am: Japan's Supreme War Council is in the middle of a meeting in Tokyo to discuss a possible conditional surrender when a messenger arrives with news of the Nagasaki blast. Noon: Bockscar begins its descent into Okinawa, with less than one minute of fuel left. Sweeney takes the mic and shouts: 'I'm coming straight in!' He lands and another crew member later recalls: 'A bunch of very jittery people debarked.' 4.30pm: Bockscar takes off again and heads for Tinian. The crew switches on Armed Forces Radio hoping to hear of a Japanese surrender, but are disappointed. 9.30pm (Japan time), 10.30pm Tinian time: Touchdown at Tinian, but there is no fanfare and photos for the arrival, unlike the scenes after the Hiroshima mission. However, Tibbets, from the Enola Gay crew, comes out to meet them. Sweeney asks: 'Now what about some beer?' Tibbets says: 'Chuck, I'm afraid I have some bad news. The beer ran out.' FRIDAY, AUGUST 10 2am (Japan time): J apanese Emperor Hirohito tells an emergency meeting of Japanese war leaders in Tokyo: 'I cannot bear to see my innocent people suffer any longer.' He says his 'sacred decision' is to surrender, on the condition that he is allowed to remain as head of state. The news is cabled to the US, which rejects the terms and demands unconditional surrender. WEDS, AUGUST 15 Noon (Japan time): Japanese radio broadcasts a pre-recorded speech by Emperor Hirohito, announcing unconditional surrender — the first broadcast by any Japanese emperor. In the UK, this will for ever be known as VJ — Victory over Japan — Day. SUNDAY, SEPT 2 9.04am (Japan time): World War Two formally ends when Japanese officials sign the surrender treaty aboard USS Missouri in Tokyo Bay. 9 9
The Sun
21 minutes ago
- The Sun
Love Island's Helena breaks silence after shock villa axe and reveals plan to double date with surprising islander
LOVE Island star Helena has broken her silence after her shock villa axe, and revealed plans to double date with a surprising Islander on the outside. Helena had her fair share of ups and downs with the public on Love Island. 4 And on Thursday night, the star was dumped from the villa alongside Blu, who she'd been in a friendship couple with. The former cabin crew member had a tumultuous relationship with Harry Cooksley on the show, with the pair even going exclusive before he dumped her for Shakira Khan. But despite that, Helena said in her exit interview that she plans on staying pals with the footballer, and that they'll even go on a double date with Meg and Dejon. She shared: 'I don't regret saying we would be friends because I was accepting of the situation and starting to move on from it. 'The main thing for me wasn't losing the relationship, it was losing our friendship as we had such a great connection. 'I wanted to still be around him and not avoid him.' Helena continued: 'I think without the pressure of being in the Villa and seeing each other on the outside we will be friends. 'Me, Meg, D and him had already made plans to do things as a four. We have so many similarities, which was why we got on in the first place.' She also opened up on the backlash Harry had received for the way he'd handled the love triangle. Love Island in new fix row as fans hit out at 'massive rule break' Helena admitted: 'Actions will always have consequences but I would still back him in some situations as he is remorseful. 'I don't think he is a bad person, I just don't think he knows how to handle certain things.' As Helena was eliminated from Love Island last night, the former cabin crew member showed a softer side on-screen that left those watching wishing they had got to know her more. After embracing her former villa-mates, Helena had a sweet, concise parting message to her ex Harry - who had been involved in a dramatic love triangle with both herself and Shakira. 'Look after Shakira,' Helena said. Despite being exclusive with Helena only days prior before the couple split, Harry admitted to still also having feelings for Shakira. Taking a moment to ask Harry to look out for Shakira was a touching gesture, especially as Helena and Shakira had the occasional spat, and Shakira and Helena's friend, Meg, were on horrible terms leading to one of the 'biggest feuds in Love Island history'. Taking to X, one viewer wrote: "Whatever you think of Helena, her walking out by saying to Harry 'be good to Shakira' is lovely. She's not the mean girl a lot of people try to make her out to be." Another added: "helena and shakira hug is so sweet." A third tweeted: "Helena telling Harry to 'be good to Shakira' after everything was a really nice thing to do." 4 4
The Sun
21 minutes ago
- The Sun
Labour is robbing us in broad daylight with extortionate council tax hikes – but I know the solution
THERE is much to heed from the wit and wisdom of The Inbetweeners, the late Noughties TV series that dared to show teenagers in all their puerile glory. I still can't even look at a gentleman carrying a briefcase without stifling the urge to scream 'Briefcase w****r!' at him. 5 5 So James 'JayFromTheInbetweeners' Buckley's F-bomb-laced council tax outburst on his The Buckleys podcast, which he does with wife Clair, had my attention. James is the latest citizen to have been informed by his local council — understood to be Chelmsford, Essex — that he will now have to pay to have his 'green waste' removed. In a deliciously expletive-fuelled rant that would make his preposterous alter ego blush with pride, he seethed: 'What do you mean you're now charging? 'Don't f***ing start that s**t. We were always f***ing paying for it, it's called council tax. Why are you fing taking more money off me and doing less? 'And everyone up and down the country is saying the exact same fing thing — what the f*** is going on?' Hear hear! With one unfiltered flare-up James, 37, who, despite his generous facial furniture still resembles the infantile gobs**te he famously portrayed, has turned this spotlight on one of the most egregious public swindles of our time. Council tax is the new Dick Turpin, robbing us in broad daylight each year on the streets where we live. I'm sure you are painfully aware of how much your bill rose this year. I know I am. Haringey Council whacked mine up by 4.8 per cent. I was lucky. Some councils begged the Government to allow it to screw even more out of people than the supposed five per cent rise threshold. Free data roaming abroad and HUGE council tax bill reductions Windsor and Maidenhead Council went as far as to ask for an outrageous 25 per cent before that was over-ruled and they had to make do with fleecing locals with a mere nine per cent rise. We particularly hate council tax increases because all around us our streets seem to be getting ever more pot-holed while our bins increasingly overflow with crap. But we are stuck, beholden to cough up with the threat of a three-month jail sentence if we stop paying then refuse to clear our debts. So the rises will increase and, with a Labour government at the helm, don't be surprised if they go up even more, despite them flirting with the idea of freezing rates when they wanted us to vote for them. Yet it doesn't have to be like this. Yes, many councils and their often ludicrously paid chiefs are utterly incompetent, which has not helped their financial positions. A quarter could go bust But the reason every council is grasping for every penny it can get is ultimately down to one enormous and ever-growing cost: Social care. Local authorities have been charged with handling social care since the late 1940s when the NHS was set up to deal with the cradle-to-grave medical matters for the then-50million people living in Britain. Back then the average life expectancy was 66 for men and 70 for women. Fast forward to 2025 and that has now rocketed to 79 for men and 83 for women. 5 Of course, the longer we live, the more meals on wheels and home visits we need and the more residential centres need to be built. The list goes on and on, hoovering up more and more cash, up to 70 per cent of some councils' budgets. And in an absurd state of affairs, town halls' social care policies are mostly dictated by Westminster, so councils are forced to pay for and administer policies they have precious little power to control. It is hard to see this faltering system continuing without a wholesale collapse of the entire local government structure. Indeed, a recent Local Government Association survey revealed that up to a quarter of all English councils could go bust by the end of next year. One way to avoid this would be to make social care nationally funded. Take the revenue- raising responsibilities for it away from councils and just let them get on with administering it. And collecting James Buckley's lawn clippings. MOLLY IS TWO MUCH MY heart goes out to poor old Molly-Mae Hague. She's been having an absolute mare. As she admitted: 'I haven't done one social, fun thing. I haven't a life.' Well, Molly, I hate to break it to you but I'm not surprised you've had a bummer summer – someone has been having all the fun by pretending to be you. That's right, an exact replica of you has been spotted having a whale of a time enjoying five-star trips to Dubai, Paris and St Tropez over the past few months. This devious doppelganger was also spotted lapping up the luxury at Wimbledon, gadding about with stars like Rebel Wilson in the VIP suite. And on Thursday your lookalike was spotted at Manchester airport with a carbon copy of your fella, Tommy, heading off for yet another holiday. That should have been you having all those larks, not someone who looks and sounds exactly like you. If I were you I'd get on to your lawyer and issue a cease and desist letter to this outrageous imposter . . . whoever she may be. HAD a maddening experience this week with Yodel, who failed to deliver a parcel three straight days in a row despite claiming it was 'out for delivery'. By day four they gave up and insisted they could not find my address despite the clear road sign and a gigantic number on my door. They then insisted I send them one of those bizarre 'what3words' phrases to identify my apparently invisible abode. It took every fibre of my being not to reply with the three words: 'Yodel F***ing Sucks'. Cruz that meant to be, Becks? CRUZ BECKHAM looked like he'd gone from nepo baby to nappy baby as he posed aboard one of the two yachts his warring family are currently on, with a giant bulge in his shorts. It was one hell of a sight for sore eyes, but then Beckham minor went a step further, ribbing his old man by aping his legs akimbo Boss underpants ad, inset, by striking the same pose in a pair of £410 trunks. Brother Romeo summed up everyone's reaction, commenting on the shot with a simple, 'Jesus!' I bet Brooklyn was itching to pile in with a cheeky quip of his own until he remembered he's in the middle of some tedious row with his folks. I like that this ubiquitous family are always taking the mick out of each other. It makes their endless social media humblebrags easier to stomach. HELP YOUR SHELF POPPED to a local shop near work the other day and was somewhat surprised to see 'top shelf' titles among its magazine selection. And there was me thinking the traditional jazz mag had been all but wiped out by the onslaught of online porn. Some of these titles looked a little on the dated side, but there were enough on display to suggest an industry still, ahem, hard at it. And then it occurred to me, with the market having suddenly entered a state of flux, these publishers are simply playing the long game. Because, as of July 25, porn sites are obliged to gather details of, er, 'users' in order to verify that they are old enough to view adult material. The move has resulted in a huge drop in visitors, as many shy away from officially registering their carnal proclivities. One site, XHamster, has reported an 85 per cent slump in UK traffic, with the firm declaring: 'Our userbase has essentially vanished in a day.' Expect long queues at the newsagent in the coming days. lI'M glad The Naked Gun reboot is getting rave reviews as I saw a trailer during a trip to see Superman and it looked abysmal. But I was never worried that Liam Neeson wouldn't be able to muster the comic timing required to follow Leslie Nielsen's brilliant Frank. Not a year goes by when I don't play the clip from Ricky Gervais' brilliant Life's Too Short, where an exquisitely earnest Liam decides he wants to get into comedy. If you've seen it you'll know how hilarious it is and, if not, Google it, then hold on to your sides. Another woke warning ANOTHER day another 'trigger warning' slapped on a TV show millions once watched without taking any offence. This time it's Minder's turn, with delicate viewers warned the Eighties show, left, may contain phrases that could cause them to self-combust with fury such as, er, 'pull a bird'. People always get hot under the collar about these warnings but personally I'd like to see more – as many as possible in fact. The more woke warnings a show contains, the more I know it's something I'll enjoy watching.
