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Mint
a day ago
- General
- Mint
The importance of ‘third places' in a disconnected world
A 25-year-old client tells me, 'I spend all my week working from home and then on weekends I'm binge watching, spending time on my couch. Sometimes I order food, I rarely head out. When I was in college, I used to be out every day, meeting friends, making plans. Now I feel lifeless and trapped, I don't know what needs to change." Another 53-year-old client says, 'I recently joined a dance class, and I can't tell you how alive I feel. The shadow of the pandemic continued to haunt my life. My work is hybrid so I'm at my office twice a week and rest of the days I'm working from my home. I have forgotten what it's like to be in spaces that are neither home nor work. I listen to podcasts, chat with friends online, play on my console and yet feel isolated and unhappy although there isn't any reason particularly to be sad." Also read: Navigating grief after a personal loss Over the last decade, and more so in the last two years, my clients have been talking about this feeling of disengagement and disconnection. The thread that connects all of them is that they spend all their time either at home or at their workplace. And this seems true across age groups. Complicating it is the fact that even at home, people are spending more and more time alone, glued to their devices or eating alone. My 25-year-old client said that while they order food from the same restaurant, her father, mother and she watch separate shows in their own spaces. As I hear clients talk about this, I wonder if our loneliness, lack of aliveness, disengagement and lethargy is linked to the loss of 'third places", a term that is attributed to sociologist Ray Oldenburg in his 1989 book The Great Good Place. Our first place is the place we live and the second place is our workplace/school/college. Using this lens, our third places are spaces beyond these two, which could be the neighbourhood salon, gym, a place of worship, park, bookstore, grocery store, restaurant or community centre. In the book, Celebrating the Third Place: Inspiring Stories about the 'Great Good Places' at the Heart of Our Communities (2001), Oldenberg writes, 'The nature of a third place is one in which the presence of a 'regular' is always welcome, although never required. Membership is a simple, fluid process of frequent social contact, renewed each time by choice of the people involved." These are places that offer us familiarity, community, warmth, connection and micro interactions. They allow us a sense of ease, help us relax and offer engagement, either in short bursts or long duration which we can choose. In my neighbourhood, the dosa place is one of my favourite third places as is the bookstore I visit regularly. Both offer enough opportunities for interaction along with a sense of belonging and comfort, and in a strange way it feels like I can park all my worries, life's agonies at the doorstep and step in to a different world. I often suggest that clients think about these spaces from a lens of what rejuvenates and energises them. Then look at them from a perspective of shared interests. One client mentioned how she found a third space in the company of friends with whom she started discussing meditation at the park, and another joined a food lovers' community to find connection, friendship and joy. The road to building long-term engagement, community and a sense of vitality lies in these third places. While online delivery and technology is bringing a massive sense of convenience, it is taking away our social fitness and eating into our third spaces. Also read: Why strong social connections matter more than ever Finally, we need to choose and make room for these spaces, even on days when ordering in and lying on the couch feels tempting. Sonali Gupta is a Mumbai-based psychotherapist. She is the author of the book You Will be Alright: A Guide to Navigating Grief and has a YouTube channel, Mental Health with Sonali.
Edinburgh Reporter
4 days ago
- Business
- Edinburgh Reporter
Edinburgh's Expanding Espresso Elite
In a column last summer, I featured what I then considered to be Edinburgh's best specialty coffee places; its 'espresso elite'. These were (in no particular order) The Source, Beatnik, Lowdown, Little Fitzroy, Cult Espresso, Williams and Johnson, and Origin. That list was far from exhaustive. Pleasingly, high quality new coffee spots continue to arrive in the city, while several established places continue to serve tasty brews. This new list includes a new spot, as well as one of the city's specialty coffee pioneers. There are , it should be noted, many other places serving fine coffee in the city. What the list shows is that the availability of high quality coffee continues a steady rise. It's all part of a general shift in the UK towards coffee, evident since the 1990s. In this sense the UK is starting to resemble continental Europe where cafes are often very numerous. Despite Brexit, we are becoming more European in this aspect. It also illustrates the way in which cafes are much more than places to drink coffee; they are for many work and study hubs, and what the sociologist Ray Oldenburg termed 'third spaces' by which he meant publicly accessible locations where social interaction can take place. Ante Ante, on Haddington Place, is a compact basement coffee spot with a clear focus on standards, complementing Spry, the highly rated wine bar, on the floor above. On my first visit, my coffee was brought to me as if it was a goblet full of a liquid with immense religious significance. Though, what I imbibed did not produce a spiritual awakening, it was richly flavour-packed. My taste buds at least experienced something divine. The care and attention expended on it had been worth it. Ante is clearly a high class addition to the coffee scene. 1b Haddington Place, EH7 4AE. Cafēn Cafēn has, in a few short months created a definite buzz, not least among others in Edinburgh's coffee scene. All those I've asked have been very impressed. In all my visits, I've been served consistently excellent brews, showing off the interesting range of beans they stock. As with some of the very best places, this includes a real focus on different brewing methods, beyond espresso. The only drawback of this instant popularity is that seats can be difficult to find. It's well worth it if you can. 44 Dundas Street, EH3 6JN. Room & Rumours Room and Rumours in the Old Town initially attracted a lot of attention for its highly rated donuts but this should not eclipse the very fine coffee that they serve. This is made with skill and precision with their under the counter machine. Room and Rumours rotate the coffees they are using, changing every few weeks. These have included beans by Clifton Coffee, based in Bristol, and Girls Who Grind; an all female roastery. More recently, they've offered Hundred House Coffee, ethically sourced from sustainable, eco-conscious growers from around the world. In all cases, the quality of the coffee served has been outstanding, a testament to the consistency of their friendly and knowledgeable baristas and the well chosen beans. Arch 13, 25 East Market Street, EH8 8FS. Artisan Roast Artisan Roast, established in 2007, is one of Edinburgh's specialty coffee pioneers. I left Artisan Roast off the list last year as I felt there was a degree of inconsistency across its four venues. This seems to have been addressed and over the last few months I've been served superb cups at all four. I'd pick out their Bruntsfield Place location as consistently the best of the bunch, while their original Broughton Street branch has a distinct bohemian vibe. It's good to see that they have maintained a strong position after all these years. 138 Bruntsfield Place, EH10 4ER. Detour Espresso This place is marked by its lively, welcoming vibe. Manager Matt Rees has created an engaging place that attracts a substantial band of regulars. Many of them are students and academics from the university, on the other side of the Meadows. Detour is something of a creative hub, with a writers group meeting there, regular art exhibitions and a well curated selection of books available. Their customers are attracted by the interesting music choices, the varied discussion and banter – and by the coffee. This has, I feel, gone up a notch or two in recent years. A tribute to a small, well trained barista team. 39 Argyle Place, EH9 1JT. Fauna Fauna, and its sister café (Heart and Bottle, near Holy Corner) make excellent use of beans by the highly rated London-based Redemption Roasters. Redemption helps provide 'prison leavers with the skills they need to gain secure and meaningful employment'. Fauna's Turkish/ Greek pastries make a great accompaniment to their coffees: especially their very moreish cinnamon dusted vanilla bougatsa. The café itself is long and thin, with an uncluttered feel. The minimalist décor creates a cool and calming atmosphere on a bustling city centre street. Fauna's arrival was part of a post-Covid revival for specialty coffee in the centre of Edinburgh. 19a Queensferry Street, EH2 4QW. Cairngorm Cairngorm in Melville Place is one of the most elegant places to drink specialty coffee in Edinburgh. Cairngorm is also close to Dean Village and other fantastic spots to wander towards, clutching a cup of one of Cairngorm's well crafted brews in your hand. Established in 2014, Cairngorm manifests some of the trends we see in the coffee scene, including a general mainstreaming of specialty coffee. Cairngorm's original basement bar on Frederick Street, which eventually closed in 2023, opened when specialty coffee was something new and edgy. Specialty coffee is no longer an underground movement – literally in Cairngorm's case. 1 Melville Place, EH3 7PR. Like this: Like Related
Forbes
03-04-2025
- General
- Forbes
3 Reasons Why You Should Find Your ‘Third Place' — By A Psychologist
The key to social well-being might lie in finding your 'third place.' Here's why these social hubs ... More are essential for happiness in an increasingly lonely world. Between the demands of work and the comfort of home, there's another space where life happens — a place where you can unwind and connect. This is what sociologist Ray Oldenburg called the 'third place' — a setting outside of home (the first place) and work (the second place) that offers community and a sense of belonging. Oldenburg introduced the concept of the 'third place' in The Great Good Place (1989), highlighting how public spaces like coffee shops, bars and bookstores facilitate social connection. He later expanded on this in Celebrating the Third Place (2000), showcasing real-world examples of their impact. Oldenburg identified key traits of third places: they are neutral ground, open to all, free from status pressures and encourage lighthearted conversation. Think of Central Perk from the TV show Friends — the coffee shop where the characters gathered daily, not just for coffee but for connection, comfort and a break from their everyday lives. This is a classic example of a third place: familiar yet energizing, social yet pressure-free. Whether it's a café, a park, a library or a gym, your third place is somewhere you frequent — a space that allows you to reset and recharge. Here's how having a third place impacts your well-being and how to find your own. A third place can be a powerful tool for combating loneliness by offering individuals a space to connect with others. For many, especially those who may lack strong social support networks, third places offer a sense of belonging. Engaging in social interactions in these settings provides a sense of community, making people feel seen and connected. Research published in the Journal of Service Research found that third places, like malls, diners or cafés, help combat loneliness by providing spaces for social interaction and emotional support. Researchers suggest these environments can create 'commercial friendships' between consumers and staff, especially in older adulthood. Additionally, third places can help create rituals and traditions among friends, which are vital for nurturing strong friendships. By routinely meeting up in the same place — whether it's a weekly coffee at a café or an afternoon walk in the park — individuals create a sense of consistency and connection. These rituals offer a structured way to maintain and deepen friendships, providing both emotional and social benefits. Over time, these traditions become more than just meetings; they evolve into significant emotional touchstones, contributing to overall well-being and combating loneliness. Research published in Applied Research in Quality of Life shows that when third places are accessible to a community, it enhances their quality of life. The sense of community and belonging that comes from engaging with such spaces plays a crucial role in shaping your emotional well-being. These spaces provide a sense of security where you can connect with others freely, knowing you can be yourself without the pressures of life. In a third place, you're also more likely to find yourself surrounded by people who share common interests or values, which creates a safe environment where people tend to feel understood and appreciated. This can contribute to feelings of comfort and confidence, as you might be able to find solace in knowing you belong to a group that values you, whether it's a group of regulars at a coffee shop or a group at a local gym. Additionally, third places allow you to engage in activities you enjoy, often with those you care about. Whether it's participating in a local book club, enjoying creative workshops, attending a fitness class or simply spending time in familiar spaces with friends, these places offer opportunities for both self-expression and creativity. The shared experience of doing something enjoyable together enhances the bond between individuals, providing a foundation for lasting friendships and community ties. Ultimately, third places allow supportive social networks and individual well-being to thrive. In these settings, people often engage in meaningful conversations that offer emotional support and motivation. These interactions can be incredibly valuable, especially in times of stress or uncertainty. A third place serves as an essential refuge, providing individuals with a much-needed break from the demands of daily life. These spaces are intentionally designed to offer a sense of comfort and detachment from routine pressures of work, home or other responsibilities, encouraging people to unwind and recharge. Oldenburg's The Great Good Place (1989) highlights how third places function as 'neutral ground,' where people can socialize informally and experience a sense of belonging. By engaging in relaxed conversations and communal activities, individuals can enjoy moments of reprieve from life's stresses. This is especially important for emotional well-being, as social support and interpersonal connections play a vital role in relieving feelings of anxiety and tension. The relaxed nature of third places provides a sanctuary where people can be their authentic selves without fear of judgment or expectations. Whether it's through casual chats with familiar faces or engaging in group activities that spark creativity and joy, these spaces encourage a sense of emotional relief. This sense of emotional support, paired with the physical act of relaxing in a comfortable setting, can significantly reduce stress and promote mental clarity. Finding a third place that suits your needs can significantly enhance your social connectedness and overall well-being. Here's how you can find your own: By intentionally finding a third place that resonates with you, you cultivate a space that nurtures both your social and mental health. Wondering how connected you are to those around you? Take this science-backed test to find out: Social Connectedness Scale
Khaleej Times
17-03-2025
- Entertainment
- Khaleej Times
UAE: How group chats become Gen Z's new 'third place' for socialising, connection
Group chats have become the new go-to spot for Gen Z to hang out, replacing traditional places like malls and coffee shops. According to the Pew Research Center, the internet has created what's known as a 'third place' — a social space outside the usual home and work or school routine. Urban sociologist Ray Oldenburg first introduced this idea in his book The Great Good Place, describing third places as informal, relaxed spots where people can unwind and be themselves. Today, for Gen Z, this 'third place' often exists in a group chat. These digital spaces are where friendships are strengthened through shared memes, inside jokes, and slang, much like an exclusive club where only the members get the humour. 'Unlike in-person meetups or even FaceTime, group chats let Gen Z stay connected without the pressure of immediate responses,' said 21-year-old Syrian expat Abbas Mahmoud. 'I can dip in and out of conversations at my own pace. Group chats aren't just for catching up, they're hubs for holiday planning, venting sessions, and sharing life updates.' With various sub-groups like friend groups, work chats, family chats, and fandom (communities of fans) groups, Gen Z can manage all aspects of social life seamlessly. 'It's also convenient because I don't have to commit to a long conversation or in-person meetups,' added Abbas. Tejasvi Sandeep Gurjar, a fashion marketer at Rochaan, echoed this sentiment, explaining how these communities have become integral to modern life. 'People order food and join online communities in their pyjamas, where group chats let you connect with friends from around the world while being in a relaxed environment.' The 22-year-old also explained apart from group chats, she regularly 'hangs out' with her friends through virtual calls that helps her save time and money while staying connected. 'I often chat with my friends from my neighbourhood or building who now live in different countries. Sometimes, we all buy our own coffee at a café and log in for a virtual hangout. "On Fridays, I log in at noon, and we chat until 4pm. This happens three times a month — it's a great way to maintain those connections. We have a lot to catch up on and usually have five to six people joining from places like Germany, the US, the UK, India, and Australia," she explained. Sharing experiences, sense of belonging For Gen Z, these group chats aren't just about keeping in touch; they provide shared experiences, foster a sense of belonging, and offer psychological safety. Wellness coaches and professionals who work with Gen Z's emphasise how group chats fulfill this generation's need for authentic connection, emotional openness, and meaningful conversations. Girish Hemnani, a life coach and energy healer based in Dubai, said, 'Group chats serve as a modern 'third place' for Gen Z. Humans seek spaces where they can express vulnerability, share ideas freely, and build trust. Group chats provide that, allowing Gen Z to connect beyond geographic limits. They offer not only quick communication but also shared experiences, a sense of belonging and safety, which are essential for personal growth and innovation.' However, he also pointed out a potential downside. 'While group chats offer incredible convenience and connection, they can unintentionally reinforce isolation if used as the sole social outlet. The key is balancing digital and real-world interactions to build authentic, deep, meaningful relationships.' M eaningful face-to-face human interactions Experts also pointed out that the key is awareness in ensuring that these digital spaces complement rather than substitute meaningful face-to-face human interactions. 'Gen Z often starts with real-life friends in group chats and then expands into online communities with like-minded people. These connections are based on shared interests, not physical appearance or social status, leading to genuine, unbiased relationships. They felt safe among strangers who shared their values rather than materialistic similarities," explained Hemant Jain, a life coach and corporate trainer based in Dubai. 'In my experience of coaching Leaders in corporate world, the Millennials who are Leaders now and have GenZ kids, perceive GenZ as lonely since they don't see them interacting much with people in real life. On the other hand, when I interact with GenZ, they tell me they have multiple networks of friends they can connect anytime on different platforms. So are never alone. Their mobile phone is their connection to their entire network of friends,' he added.
Yahoo
06-02-2025
- Entertainment
- Yahoo
What Are ‘Fourth Spaces' & Why Are They Trending With Gen Z?
Many of us are familiar with the term 'third place.' Or, if you're not, let me give you a rudimentary breakdown of a phrase that you'll now notice all the time. For adults, there's their home, there's their workplace, and then there's that third place — their local coffee shop, bar, mall, library, or any space for public gatherings — that is ultra-special in their lives. Think: Central Perk in Friends or the diner in Seinfeld. Urban sociologist Ray Oldenburg is credited with coining the term in the '90s, and he argued that these 'third places' are vital to communities and let people put aside the concerns associated with that first and second place. It's where the fun and relaxation can (hopefully) happen. More from SheKnows There's No Rule Book for Parents About Teens & Dating - But This Expert Advice Comes Close Now, the term 'Fourth Space' is entering the chat. Yes, Fourth Space (I know that slight change will be upsetting to some Type A personalities out there — myself included). It's a space that, according to new research, Gen Z and Millenials are increasingly seeking. Event promotion company Eventbrite and dcdx, a company that specializes in Gen Z research and insights, surveyed 2 thousand people, mostly ages 18-35, per Ticket News. The study found that 95 percent of people in this demographic are 'interested in exploring their online interests face-to-face.' This means, that despite what parents of teens and young adults might think, there is this shift away from screens (halle-freakin'-lujah!) and back toward in-person interactions. So retro! 'Fourth Spaces' go beyond just a regular ol' hangout with friends. They are intentional gathering places that typically bring people's digital interests to life. So, if they've been watching cooking videos on TikTok, their Fourth Space might be a Supper Club. Or, if they're always playing Candy Crush or Wordle, maybe they've joined a board game meetup. Getting the gist? The study also found that jewelry-making or crocheting classes are gaining interest, along with comedy shows, anime conventions, running clubs, and more events, classes, or meetups that encourage genuine interactions based on a common interest. It's all about blending digital interests with IRL experiences. And while the idea of getting together with people to do something you like might not sound revolutionary, it sort of is — for a demographic known for excessive screen time. 'This shift is happening because teens and young adults are developmentally wired to invest in their individuality and find meaningful relationships outside their homes,' Grace Lautman, licensed mental health counselor at Honor Nutrition & Counseling, tells SheKnows. 'These kids have obviously had so much access to technology and the online world, and that was exacerbated during the pandemic, but that doesn't mean they want friendships and communities to be exclusively online.' Lautman swears it's a 'total misconception' that these generations prefer online communities over in-person ones, and hopes parents find solace in the fact that, again, teens and young adults are 'innately wired' to crave in-person connections. If you think your Gen Z-er needs a nudge to find their own Fourth Space, Lautman recommends asking open-ended questions about their online interests and approaching the conversation with a genuine sense of curiosity. 'Teens are developmentally prone to establishing their differences or opposition to parents, so we help them foster in-person spaces more effectively when we avoid saying things that put them on the defensive,' Lautman says. Meaning, don't force them into a certain Fourth Space. You want to be asking, not probing. For some young people, it's easier to identify their Fourth Space than others. A teen who loves to play FIFA every day will likely want to join a soccer league (or at least attend some games). 'Someone else may be passionate about something like storytelling; for that person, a book club, writers club, or in-person role-play games might be the ticket,' Lindsey Gray, a cognitive behavioral expert and Head Teen Coach of The Attitude Advantage Program tells SheKnows. 'There's always a way to 'team up' with others who 'tick' just like us, in our digital and physical worlds.' So how do you get started? Platforms like Meetup are designed to help connect people with relevant (you guessed it) meetups near them. There's everything from game nights, craft workshops, hiking groups, and more. Navi Hughes, a therapist and psychiatric nurse practitioner with Empower Mental Health, also suggests finding volunteer opportunities that align with their interests to give young adults 'a sense of purpose.' VolunteerMatch is a great place to find nonprofits in need of a hand. And, when in doubt, turn to your mom friends or parent Facebook groups for suggestions on local Fourth Spaces. Bonus points if you get a new Fourth Space started! (Can your teen and their peers meet in your basement for a monthly knitting hour? Can you talk to the local library about hosting international film nights?) No matter how your teen's Fourth Space manifests, it's encouraging to see this movement away from screen time and toward more authentic interactions — no chargers or blue light glasses required. (Although some snacks certainly wouldn't hurt!)Best of SheKnows Recent Baby & Toddler Product Recalls Every Parent and Caregiver Should Know About 10 History-Making Black Moms Whose Amazing Stories Everyone Should Know Celebrity Parents Who Are So Proud of Their LGBTQ Kids
