Bride Weighs Attending Grandmother's Funeral Against Long-Planned Wedding Parties
A bride doesn't want to cancel her pre-wedding events to attend her grandmother's funeral that's scheduled the same weekend
The bride wasn't close with her deceased paternal grandmother, so she doesn't want to miss out on her bridal shower and bachelorette party for the funeral
Reddit users warned the bride that her relationship with her father, who wants her at the funeral, may be hurt by her decisionA bride is contemplating whether she's in the wrong for not canceling her pre-wedding events and consequently missing her grandmother's funeral.
In a post on Reddit's popular "Am I the A------" forum, the bride-to-be asked for "some outside perspective" on her choice to not attend her grandmother's funeral. She explained that this is her first time asking for advice on the platform because it's really weighing on her whether or not she's making the right call.
The woman, 30, and her fiancé, 29, have three wedding festivities scheduled for next weekend: the bride's "kitchen tea" (bridal shower) and bachelorette party, and the groom's "stag party" (bachelor party).
"This weekend has been planned for months with people from all over coming to attend," she shared.
On Thursday, July 31, the bride's paternal grandmother unexpectedly died. Her funeral is scheduled for next Saturday, the same weekend as the wedding parties.
"My father wants me to cancel the weekend and come through for the funeral," the bride said.
The woman doesn't want to skip out on her long-awaited celebrations for the funeral because she didn't have a close relationship with her grandmother.
"For some context, my parents got divorced when I was 7 and we didn't really have a relationship with my father or his side of the family," she explained. "Over the last five years my sister and I got closer with our father again. We currently have a great relationship, but we never reconnected with his side of the family."
The bride concluded her post by asking: "Would I be the asshole for not canceling the weekend's plans and not attending my grandmother's funeral?"
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Reddit users thought that the soon-to-be bride was NTA (Not The A------), but told her to consider her father's feelings and how her decision may impact their future relationship.
"I'm not sure how you expect your father to feel knowing that you were basically partying while he buried his mother," the top comment reads. "If you want to be close going forward, maybe consider whether this would affect it."
"To be blunt, it doesn't really matter if you connected with your father's side of the family or not. Funerals may be about the dead, but they are for the living. Your father is asking you to be there for him while he grieves for his mother," another Redditor commented. "You say you have a great relationship with your father, the question is do you want to keep that? Because if you don't attend, you risk doing permanent damage to the relationship. Please don't think I'm saying that's fair, I genuinely don't think it is, but it is a possible result of not attending."
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