7 Things Elementary-Age Kids Worry About the Most, According to a Child Psychologist

Yahoo

08-06-2025

7 Things Elementary-Age Kids Worry About the Most, According to a Child Psychologist originally appeared on Parade.
Think back to when you were in elementary school. Between the fun stuff, like recess, field trips and sleepovers, you likely worried about things from time to time, right? Back then, just like today, there were also bullies and friendship dynamics to navigate. Because kids interact with each other daily, often dealing with certain issues for the first time, any child can get stressed out. But what do elementary-age kids the most today?As it turns out, younger generations are more worried and anxious than previous ones, with research pointing to this fact, as reported by a 2011 American Journal of Orthopsychiatry study. Data from the National Survey of Children's Health also found that the prevalence of children diagnosed with anxiety rose from 9.5% in 2020 to over 11% in 2022 among children aged 6 to 11. With the rise of social media, reality TV and the pressure to achieve so much, it makes sense that kids are more anxious than ever.However, are those the only things elementary-age kids worry about these days? How can parents support them? And when does worry become indicative of something larger, like an anxiety disorder? Parade reached out to a child psychologist to get some of these answers to help out kids and parents alike.Related:
Like adults, children naturally worry. Child psychologist Jacque Cutillo, Ph.D., LLP, LPC, LMHC, Director of Specialized Operations at Youth Villages, says that at the elementary school stage, kids are figuring out their place in the world, testing their beliefs and managing increased responsibilities at home and at school. Additionally, they're navigating peer relationships, gaining independence and exploring interests. 'They develop flexible thinking, considering more 'gray' options instead of just black and white,' Cutillo remarks. 'And navigating the gray can bring new challenges in determining right and wrong.' Related: Have a Nervous Child in the Doctor's Office? Here's How to Ease Shot Anxiety in Your Kids
As is the case with adults, yes, some kids are just predisposed to worry more. 'Some children do worry more than others, but there are both biological and environmental components to consider,' Cutillo says. For instance, some children have a lower tolerance when managing stressful events, or they might have higher standards they hold themselves to, which can result in increased worry. Also, as Cutillo points out, children's worries can fluctuate from day to day depending on the stressors they are facing. Finally, children are often mirroring how their parents navigate worries. As Cutillo says, if adults can navigate through stressful situations or tolerate levels of unknowns in their daily interactions, children will observe that modeled behavior and develop their own strategies for similar situations. Related:
At times, kids can worry about adult concerns like housing, finances and adult relationships. 'Adults are sharing more about things that impact their family with their children. Children are more frequently privy to family concerns at an earlier stage of navigating the concern before adults have a plan to solve the issue,' Cutillo says.
Calling them 'macro-level concerns,' Cutillo says that modern-day issues such as politics and immigration can be top of mind for children. 'Children are far more observant now about local, national and international issues because of increased exposure,' she explains.
Peer concerns, such as feeling included, fitting in and navigating relationships can be a big source of worry. Cutillo says that kids compare themselves to their peers, from what snacks they bring to lunch to how they perform on a test. 'Competition and performance have become hallmarks in conversations, and needing to keep up continues to increase stressors to maintain relevancy and remain involved in peer groups,' she observes.
Labeling it as social media 'infatuation,' Cutillo says that this state has become more common among children, even from a young age. 'Part of this is modeled behavior from caregivers who use their phone or other device to engage in social media usage or technology devices to distract and decompress,' she explains. 'Additionally, technology is everywhere, and a lot of social interaction happens over technology.' Related:
Children may worry when trying to meet their own expectations, the expectations of the adults in their lives or simply by media that can influence them. 'Our children want to be good at things and want to have the skills to succeed," Cutillo says. "Children are doing the best they can with the skills they have, and some have developed the need to be perfect at everything they try.'
Transitional experiences in life—both small and substantial—can create a lot of worry for a child. As Cutillo notes, it can be something as simple as a change in routine or a new activity, or it can be something larger, such as moving or experiencing loss. 'Changes in daily living result in worry for most people—it is not surprising that children experience the same feelings,' she says.
Just like work worries for adults, kids get anxious about school as well. 'Many children experience worries about school performance,' Cutillo says. 'This may be regarding classroom activities, maintaining behavioral norms, standardized tests or public speaking.' Related: If Your Parents or Grandparents Did These 7 Things When You Were a Kid, You're Probably an Anxious Adult
Cutillo says that parents can support their children by discussing their feelings openly, addressing daily worries and noticing changes in mood and behavior. 'Even small worries should be taken seriously, as they may be significant to the child,' she cautions. 'Engaging in problem-solving and discussing physiological symptoms helps model good skills and supports emotional development.' She also advises using age-appropriate language and monitoring the information your children are consuming (i.e. through social media). Limiting screen time and trying to avoid sensitive news topics can be beneficial when it comes to their worries.As a parent, you'll also want to be aware of how you're modeling healthy habits to your children. Cutillo also recommends answering children's questions honestly and appropriately, seeking answers together if needed. This can be addressed through kid-friendly resources like books, shows or podcasts. Lastly, you can work together to create a 'worry box,' something that can help kids manage their worries, and they can make it unique to them. She suggests using a shoebox or another small box with a lid, decorating it and having your kids place their worries inside for safekeeping, perhaps written on slips of paper.Related: Child Psychologists Are Begging Parents and Grandparents To Stop Asking These 10 Questions
'When worries grow large and seem to be impacting daily activities or relationships, that is a time to seek further support to help your child navigate their worries,' says Cutillo. 'When worries become a problem, caregivers may notice a change in their child's mood or behavior. A typically energetic and outgoing child may withdraw or appear more subdued.'You might notice a change in tone or attitude if your child is experiencing stressors, as well. You should also watch for changes in physiological presentation as well, including difficulty falling or staying asleep, changes in appetite and reports of head or stomachaches, as she explains.
Related: There's a chance that these everyday worries may indicate a clinical anxiety disorder. Cutillo says that these characteristics can include excessive worry about a variety of topics over a significant amount of time or a fixation around a specific phobia, social event or even being separated from a primary caregiver.What should you do if these are things you're noticing? 'Caregivers should reach out to their child's pediatrician or school support for further assessment and intervention,' Cutillo says. 'If you notice unsafe behaviors, such as self-harm or suicidal comments or behaviors, seek immediate support from a professional.' Up Next:Jacque Cutillo, Ph.D., LLP, LPC, LMHC, child psychologist and Director of Specialized Operations at Youth Villages
7 Things Elementary-Age Kids Worry About the Most, According to a Child Psychologist first appeared on Parade on Jun 7, 2025
This story was originally reported by Parade on Jun 7, 2025, where it first appeared.