Bride Questions Bridesmaid's Commitment, Considers Kicking Her Out of Wedding Party Due to Delayed Replies
A bride asked Reddit users if she would be in the wrong for kicking one of her bridesmaids out of her wedding party
The bride is upset because her bridesmaid "doesn't seem to have the time" to answer "simple questions," often taking up to a month to respond to her
Redditors commented that the bride wasn't in the wrong, but warned that the demotion might hurt the women's friendshipA bride wants to demote her bridesmaid just four months before her wedding.
An October bride asked Reddit users in a post on the platform's "Am I the A------" forum if she would be in the wrong for kicking her childhood best friend out of her wedding party. The bride has known this bridesmaid since high school and thought she could depend on her, but she hasn't made her wedding a priority.
"There have been numerous occasions throughout the whole process of the wedding planning where I needed answers from everyone and I have not gotten a response from her," the bride explained.
Although the bride knows that "life can get busy" and that her wedding should not be any of her bridesmaids' "top priority," her grace period only goes so far. She gives everyone "at least a week's notice," but often much "longer" to respond to "simple questions," such as whether or not a makeup artist should be hired for them. Yet, this doesn't seem to be enough time for the bridesmaid in question.
"It sometimes takes her two weeks to a month to answer simple questions," the bride wrote, noting that her friend still hasn't responded to several of her queries, including about wedding day makeup.
The bride is at her wits' end. She's spoken privately to her bridesmaid about her expectations "multiple times," yet "nothing is working." Now, she thinks that dropping her bridesmaid from her wedding party might be the best — and only — solution for both of them.
"I am really considering kicking her out of the wedding party because she doesn't seem to have the time," she said.
The majority of Reddit users in the comments section said that the bride is "NTA (Not The A------)" for kicking her bridesmaid out of her wedding party if she's done everything she can to remedy the situation.
"You're planning [a] major life event, not begging for attention, if she can't show up now in small ways, she won't show up when it really counts," one person commented.
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"If they're not going to prioritize you, you don't need to prioritize them," another Redditor agreed. "If they're not going to answer you or help you out in communicating with you basic things, then they're not worth the energy. Kick them out and move on. You'll be much happier in the long run, and if she doesn't understand and gets mad, then maybe she was never really your friend in the first place."
Other Reddit users recommended that the bride "have a chat with her first and find out what her problem is" in order to "salvage some of the relationship."
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