Emily Ratajkowski Has Zero Straight Men In Her Life

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4 hours ago

Emily Ratajkowski is deprioritizing "straight men," and I honestly love that for her.
In a June 18 interview with Elle UK, the supermodel shared how she's entering a new era where her womanhood and femininity are at the center of her universe.
For Emily, she's learned to deprioritize men. "Not centering men is really wonderful," she said. "In general, in our world, men have somehow filed this space, but what I found instead of it is community."
"I still like men," she explained. "I just have zero straight men in my life, unless they're a romantic interest. In the hierarchy of needs, that's at the top of the pyramid, which is nice. [Men are] pleasure and fun, but not a part of my core."
"The rest of my life is community with other women and queer people, and being a mom," she added.
She is a mother to Sylvester Apollo Bear, whom she shares with ex-husband Sebastian Bear-McClard.
Part of that "community" she discussed is her good friend Lena Dunham, who included her in her new Netflix series Too Much.
Besides starring in one of my favorite TV creators' new shows and always serving us ridiculously beautiful, not-so-candid paparazzi photos, EmRata always has a way with words, and her latest take is certainly making waves on the internet.
When Emily's quotes hit this Reddit thread, people had a lot of thoughts about the idea of her having "zero straight men" in her life and why she's choosing to decenter men. Here are some compelling responses:
"I get it. Just wanted to build a friendship with a male neighbor and had one coffee with him, and whoosh the supposedly funny messages seasoned with sexual hints are coming in. Pisses me off so much."
"I feel this. Most straight men I interact with for longer than ten minutes end up flirting with me. I hate it so much. In high school, almost all of my straight male friends tried hitting on me multiple times. I stopped having serious straight male friends years ago."
"Yeah, it's a bit sad, but every male friend I've had eventually ended up trying to get something sexual from me. I can have more superficial friendships, as in, we can have a conversation in a group of people and get along. But 1:1 meet-ups I just won't do anymore because time and time again this has ended up being the end goal, and I'm so feeling tired of it."
"This is normal for hot women. Straight men want to sleep with her, not be her friend. She's probably encountered enough of that to set her life up like this and avoid the trouble."
"I still have trouble navigating adult friendships and wonder if this is a common thought among men and women. I just want friends, but stuff like this is usually in the back of my head when I try to make friends with women."
"As someone who's a guy and friends with some hot women…I get it. I don't try to get with them because they're just my friends (shocker), but it's an epidemic issue. It's also not one-sided. A lot of the same doors are opened for hot men, and that introduces the same issues. It's very hard for our culture — right now, but I actually think not forever — to just respect the human across from you as a human first. But maybe that's naive."
"Isn't this..... normal? Most guys are like this too, they have no women in their life unless they're a romantic interest and that's OK, too."
Finally, "I'm a man with many male and female friends. I don't know how I'd actually feel if my female friends just decided this about me. 10 years ago, when I was coming of age, it felt like the trend was that all the gender barriers were coming down, and of course, men and women could be friends — now it feels like we're back to playground rules as some sort of edgy trend. Are the 1980s back or something?"
Now, I want to hear what you think. Is it possible to maintain platonic friendships with people you could be attracted to, or are they always doomed to become something more? What are your biggest wins or failures while trying to maintain a platonic friendship that could've been romantic? Share your stories in the comments or use this anonymous form.