Husband's demand for ‘me time' after ‘stressful' work day scrutinized by stay-at-home-mom sympathizers: ‘Can you buck up?'
The man, a dad of three — ages nine, six and two — recently spilled his burnout woes on Reddit's AITAH [Am I The A—hole?] forum.
'I work in healthcare, so I can have pretty full-on/stressful days and can often feel very emotionally as well as physically drained when I get home from work and have been feeling increasingly burnt out recently.'
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The dad of three (ages nine, six, and two) recently vented his burnout blues on Reddit's AITAH forum — and the internet's reaction was anything but unanimous.
Studio Romantic – stock.adobe.com
After long, stressful days, he claimed he's running on empty. 'I find I can function at work to get the job done, but once I'm home, I've got nothing in the tank, which leads to having very little patience and really only being present in body only,' he wrote. His only 'me time,' he explained, is the commute home and a rare weekly run, with post-bedtime doom-scrolling and TV binges to recharge.
The real kicker? He's expected to tag-team with wifey to wrestle with his little rascals as soon as he enters the ring.
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The man asked bluntly, 'AITAH [am I the a—hole] for wanting some me time when I get home?'
Reddit users were quick to weigh in — and it wasn't a unanimous cheer squad.
'Can you get a sitter or someone to watch the kids for 1-2 days a week?' one practical soul suggested.
Another dropped marriage counselor wisdom: 'The solution was for him to have 10-15 minutes decompression time when he got in from work. But once that time was up, he had to do whatever she needed him to do.'
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Some users, however, served a cold dose of reality.
Looks like when it comes to parenting burnout, it's not just about clocking hours — it's about sharing the load. And maybe 'me time' is a team sport.
Elnur – stock.adobe.com
'I'm a physician (F). My ex-wife raised our 2 kids while I did a very stressful job… So I guess you signed up for having kids? Do you want someone else to raise them? Can you buck up and realize you are all in? … You need to understand that it's a sacrifice and it won't be forever.'
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Others called out the dad for overlooking his wife's nonstop 24/7 grind.
'NTA [not the a—hole] for now, but leaning towards YTA [you're the a—hole]. What breaks does the stay-at-home Mom get? What adult interaction does she get? Does she have a commute to decompress? Does she get ME time?'
'You get vacation time… when is hers? Not only is she raising kids, she's managing the house, cooking, cleaning and mental load… Grow up and be a partner.'
Still, some offered a middle ground. 'NTA for wanting a little me time, but you also have to think about your wife's me time too. Talk to her… maybe call a sitter, schedule her a spa day during your work hours and let her have her me time that day and have your me time the day after… You guys have to communicate and compromise.'
As previously reported by The Post, today's busy parents are finding creative ways to make every second count with their kids — like millennial stay-at-home mom Sara Martinez, who went viral with the '9-minute theory,' spotlighting three key three-minute windows a day when parental presence matters most.
From Upper West Side entrepreneurs hiring help to moms moving off the grid for quality time, parents are reshaping the rules on how to balance burnout and bonding — proving that sometimes, it's less about quantity and more about making moments count.
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